| Synopsis |
Chapter Summaries[]
Chapter 1: The Sounds That Make You Want to Cry[]
The Witch of Envy’s unexpected arrival elicits several emotions from the other Witches, though Echidna’s was that of hatred and disgust, something Subaru didn’t think she could express after writing her off as a sociopath. Memories of the Witch’s attack on the Sanctuary started replaying in Subaru’s mind as he worried what she was going to do in this dream world, but to his surprise, none of the witches were trying to defend themselves, and the Witch of Envy wasn’t trying to attack anyone. Minerva even walked forward without fear, asking if this is the person she knows and if she can trust her.
Subaru asks why none of the witches are attacking her since she killed all of them, so he thought they would bear a grudge against her. Echidna says nothing would please her more than to do so, but she tells Subaru that if she attacks the Witch of Envy, she’ll become an enemy of the other witches. Subaru is still confused because he thought the Witch of Envy was an enemy to everyone, but Carmilla and Daphne tell Subaru that while they do have a grudge against the witch, they don’t have a grudge against Satella, and a candidate to becoming a sage should know that much, though Sekhmet warns her that Subaru doesn’t know any about that yet. Everyone’s vagueness only infuriates Subaru as he feels he’s being left out of the loop.
Finally, Echidna explains to Subaru that while the world recognizes Satella as the Witch of Envy, what they don’t know is that Satella has a split personality brought on by Satella absorbing a Witch Factor she was incompatible with. Hearing that made him realize that the reason the witches weren’t fighting back was because they didn’t know if the person in front of them was the witch or Satella, with Echidna being the only one who seems to hate both. Echidna tells Subaru that if she crosses the other witches just to dispose of her, she’ll most likely perish for good, while the other five are content with disappearing forever as long as they live according to their own personal beliefs, something Subaru has trouble accepting.
Subaru asks what the witch is doing here now, and Minerva tells him to ask her himself because she came to meet him herself. Subaru vehemently refuses to just do what the witches tell him, prompting Sekhmet to ask him what he will do then because what happens next will all be decided by his actions. Subaru asks Echidna if she intends to let him out of her Castle of Dreams, but she simply says she wants to see what he’ll do, to his annoyance. Finally, Subaru walks over to the witch, though he tries his best not to look into her eyes out of fear of what will happen. To his surprise, the witch offers her hands to him, which confused him greatly as it caused him to feel no anger or disgust, but relief. He snaps himself out of it as the witch tells Subaru that she has loved him and him alone.
Hearing the witch’s confession caused Subaru to become wracked with fear and desperately wanting to escape the dream world. Despite the witch constantly telling Subaru she loves him, he demands she stop, as while his mind was rejecting her, his soul felt comforted by her words, and that contradicting left him terrified. Subaru knew that ever since he was summoned this world, he had loved Emilia for helping him when he needed it most, and how even in his darkest moments, he felt she was his salvation, but now he has even more people who he wishes to protect, which is what motivates him to keep pushing forward despite the potential pain, and now confronting the Witch of Envy, he feared she would take all of those feelings away. Subaru tells the witch that she and everyone else present are insane and he wants to leave the dream world, declaring that he won’t take any of their help and instead will handle things by himself like he should have from the start.
Minerva tells Subaru that if he dies, he’ll just make everyone sad while writing off their feelings as a “necessary sacrifice”. Subaru ignores her words saying the pain and trauma that comes with Return By Death is his and his alone, but Minerva continues saying while he may accept a life of suffering, the others around him won’t, but he chooses to ignore them, and to her that makes him more twisted and creepy than any witch. Subaru retorts that he thinks this way because of everything he has been through, and he blames the Witch of Envy for putting him in this position in the first place.
Subaru says that as long as no one else is going through the same pain and suffering he does whenever he uses Return By Death, then he will willingly bear it. He is told that shouldering everything by himself without talking to anyone else suggests he thinks no one else beside him can make their own decisions, but he says without his intervention they would just end up with horrible futures. Subaru then tells the witches that while he doesn’t take back anything he said to them, he is grateful for Return By Death, and he will continue to rely on that power from here on out to save everyone around him.
The witch, however, asks Subaru not to cry or hurt himself, which continues to confuse him, and when she tells him to “love”, he assumes she is telling him to love her, but she clarifies she wants him to love himself and take better care of himself. Subaru rejects this because she was the one who gave him this power in the first place and feels without it he’ll have no way of coping with the pain. He yells that because he has no other special abilities like the others around him, the only thing he can offer to be useful is his own life, and if he is the only one who suffers than so be it, but the witch continues to tell him not to cry or be sad. Ultimately, Subaru confesses that if he had been more careful than Rem wouldn’t have fallen into a coma, and without her, who was his pillar of support, he feels he can rely on no one but himself, and if he can’t forge a better future with Return By Death, then he’ll lose everyone just like he lost Rem.
After a bit of silence, Sekhmet speaks up and tells Subaru he is acting like a sobbing child with his outburst, and Typhon starts consoling him while asking who made him cry. Satella finally speaks up and tells Subaru that the reason why she loves him is because he gave her light, took her hand, and showed her the outside world, and when she was lonely he comforted and kissed her while telling her she isn’t alone, and because he gave her everything, she’ll never stop loving him. However, Subaru couldn’t understand her words because as far as he knows, he has never known her beforehand, instead thinking she is just delusional, but as much as he wanted to believe that, deep down somewhere he knew it was true, which made him feel even more conflicted.
Finally, Subaru tries to kill himself by biting off his tongue, even though he knew it was just in his mind rather than be his real body. Minerva immediately moved to heal Subaru, but Typhon stops her, saying she shouldn’t interfere with Subaru’s choice. Minerva retorts that she will heal every injury she sees since mental illness is beyond her understanding, even if it means destroying the world. She attacks Typhon and blows her away, but Typhon was able to shatter Minerva’s arm using her Authority. Before Minerva could act again, Sekhmet restrains her, saying she is on Typhon’s side. Satella then knelt down to Subaru and asks him why he doesn’t consider saving himself as important as saving the others in his life, but he refuses to accept this without Rem. However, Satella asks Subaru what he witnessed in the second trial, and somewhere in his fading mind he recalls the words of his parents, Julius saying he wanted to be his friend, Ferris’s frustration that Subaru took his own life so easily, Beatrice’s saddness over his death, Rem’s words of encouragement, and finally, Emilia gratefully thanking Subaru for helping her.
Subaru began to think about his friends and if they would truly be sad for his death in the timelines he leave behind, and he begins to think it is okay for him to live with the people he cares about. He finally confesses he doesn’t want to die, and Minerva gets in close and heals him with a headbutt. Once Subaru recovers from his injuries, he asks if he truly is worth more than dying and if the people in his life care for him. Minerva tells Subaru she can’t answer that question as she fixes herself, but she does say that Satella loves him dearly, and the second trial was to show him how sad others would be when he dies, not witness his own failings. Subaru realizes Minerva is right when he recollects the sorrow and kind sendoffs he got in the trial, and he accepts it is okay to be selfish and value his life just as much as he values his friends. Satella answers Subaru’s question saying she permits him to live after he saved her, leaving him a sobbing mess.
While this transpired, Daphne made sure to keep Typhon and Sekhmet at bay, which Echidna saw as impressive. Daphne explains that she wants to see Subaru triumph over the Great Rabbit just like he said he would, though Echidna asks if she is truly okay with that, which she says she is, seeing it as a conclusion to the beast’s endless hunger. Echidna asks if Carmilla has anything to add, considering she used her Authority to help him recognize and she says she’s both glad Subaru resisted Echidna’s contract, and she doesn’t want Subaru to take his love for himself for granted.
Hearing her answer, Echidna realized that all the witches tried to help Subaru in their own unique way; Typhon and Sekhmet honoring his wishes; Minerva healing him; Daphne encouraging him; and Carmilla opening his eyes to his own value, all which Echidna found very interesting and asks Subaru if he thinks so himself. Subaru instead says he can’t comprehend the reasoning of the witches, and while he knows what he must do, but he doesn’t know how to accomplish it anymore. Echidna once again offers to form a contract with Subaru, promising that she will guide him to the path where everyone lives, regardless of the path he follows. This time, Subaru tells Echidna that he doesn’t want to get hurt or get others hurt, and he especially doesn’t want to die, so he once again refuses to form a contract with her. He wants to witness the value the people in his life see he has, and the only way to do that is to keep living. Echidna warns him it will be a thorny path, but she also recognizes it as a greedy decision, and she accepts it. Echidna then warns Subaru that Garfiel is afraid of the outside world ever since he partook in the first trial, and if he wants to succeed, he will need to address that, though Subaru is surprised she would give him genuinely helpful advice, which she says is because she is fond of him.
Subaru laments his inability to understand the witches’ behavior, but he is still grateful for all of their help. He then walks over to Satella and tells her he doesn’t know who she is or why she told him she loves him or why she said he saved her, but he is grateful for Return By Death because it is how he has made it this far, but now he undestands it is just one option among others, and he should love himself more. Above all, he understands Satella gave him this power so he doesn’t die for good, and he will work on loving himself as she takes his hand. The Castle of Dreams begins to disappear, and Subaru realizes he is returning to the outside world. Satella advises Subaru to worry alongside his comrades and struggle together with them rather than alone, and above all, to fear death and know that others will be sad when he dies. The veil over Satella’s face disappears as Subaru witnesses her face for the first time, as she asks him if he will kill her one day. Instead, Subaru tells Satella he will save her as the castle disappears.