Re: "It was their behavior that got them there in the first place"
All three definitions refer to more or less the same, only the perspective differs. The problem with CoCs is that they are a vehicle employed by adherents of Critical Theory and its many offshoots (here, "SJWs" for short) to limit other people's speech to their liking by establishing themselves as arbiters of truth and goodness. Convoluted rules, secret proceedings, deliberate vagueness, the lot. Far from leveling any playing field, it is ment to cause strife, then blame the victims for being strife-causers so they can be silenced, ejected, "dealt with". This is cancel culture in action.
For many partaking in the spiel there's not much concious thought going on: The mechanisms employed run on cult mechanics so most people, even in the thick of it, are only dimly aware of what's really going on. For some good scholarship on the mechanics at play, try and see newdiscourses.com, though there are other sources too. So yeah, we have stupid strife and most barely see where it's coming from, but that's deliberate.
Since you brought them up, I was actually obscurely happy with the UK anti-immigrant riots. Not because I support any such thing, which I don't, but because finally we see some back-pressure the other way. For note that we, that is pretty much the entire Western world, have long been played by extreme left pressure groups. They're tiny, but there's many, one for every tiny issue some lefty cares to think up, and they have been having grossly outsized influence. This has skewed perspective. Consider that the "Capitol rioters" could easily be reframed as "citizens concerned about their vote", thus extremely engaged democrats. Certainly if you compare those "mostly peaceful" Portland riots, doing so much more damage, even up to outright and explicit sedition and call for secession, and attacks on public order and its keepers. And that's ignoring the long-term fall-out for the affected communities, the nepotism and graft within the BLM organisation, the fact they outright admitted to being "trained Marxists, don't worry", and other things that shouldn't be ignored. Both in the UK, say these riots compared to various "XR" and other like groups' misdeeds, like the art-attackers and the motorway mobs, and the "Capitol rioters" vs. the Portland mobs, compare and contrast the state-led prosecution of each group. There is a marked difference in repercussions and the division runs along ideological lines.
The thing is, we are living under a yoke where a lot of things cannot be said and much of this is ideologically coloured. Things that we increasingly cannot afford to not be able to talk about. As you can see here, where voicing concerns about the wellbeing of the project is rewarded by character assassination and suspension, to be followed by forceful ejection from the project. That this will lose the project an engaged and knowledgeable contributor is nothing to the bureaucrats driving the process. Their ideology trumps any technical prowess.
In the wider political perspective, the riots ought to be a wake-up call. I sincerely hope it's not too late to divert the ire away from simple racism, but that can only happen if it gets recognised as having at least some legitimacy. Which it does, since there are real problems underlying the ire that need addressing. Instead it's again labeled simplistically with a big word of big badness and attacked and suppressed in its entirety. Thus leaving the problems to fester until the next, and stronger, and even less nuanced, outburst. The longer the issues are ignored, the more costly the cleanup afterward. I do think this ostrich-like behaviour is the main driver towards reiterating past mistakes.
As to the python project, "go woke, get broke". Like a bunch of other projects that let themselves get bamboozled into letting the SJWs in, they're going to have to get rid of that BS before they can hope to start functioning again. A fork seems more likely.
Biting the hand that feeds IT
