* Posts by Ian Johnston

4052 publicly visible posts • joined 28 Sep 2007

Open source devs consider making hogs pay for every download

Ian Johnston Silver badge

No. Capitalism is making money from owning capital. There is a clue in the name

Trump orders purge of 'woke' Anthropic from government

Ian Johnston Silver badge

At a dollar a year, principles are cheap.

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Re: This presents us with a disconcerting conundrum.

Anthropic are AI doomer nutcases with links to "rationalism", lesswrong, Yudkin and a whole seam of unpleasantness. That's why their press releases are always about something deeply unpleasant that "AI" is about to do, honest. Give them lots of money to build the good AI, now!

Amazon and Nvidia open their wallets to lock in OpenAI's business while SoftBank keeps the lights on

Ian Johnston Silver badge

So just more promissory notes going round in circles to keep the scam going and delay the inevitable. The ultimate effects on the US economy are going to be horrifying, but rather fun to watch. Especially if Mr Trump is still president.

Harvard boffins finally crack the mystery of squeaky sneakers

Ian Johnston Silver badge

It's sticking and slipping at a high frequency. I'm guessing final year engineering project which for an American university ( their final year's are about the same as our second or third because of the whisky broad curriculum) ain't too bad.

Ian Johnston Silver badge
Holmes

So it's not "stick-slip"; it's "... the rubber surface, contacting and then releasing from the glass," Or, to put it another way, sticking and then slipping. Great. I'm glad they've cleared that up.

Sopra Steria sues UK government over £958M Capita outsourcing award

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Capita's bid for the contract was "abnormally low"

Capita's final charges, however, will not be abnormally low. And they won't do the work, either, because why change a winning formula?

Anthropic to Pentagon: Autonomous weapons could hurt US troops and civilians

Ian Johnston Silver badge

This one. Anthropic constantly release nonsense about threats posed by AI because (a) they are a bunch of doomer wackjobs and (b) they want to big up the capabilities of their crappy autocomplete system. There is hardly an article about them in El Reg which doesn't fall into this category.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

More marketing bullshit from the AI doomers at Anthropic.

Anthropic launches new marketing blog, pretends it's being 'written' by 'retired' LLM

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Remember that Anthropic is fun by "rationalist" AI doomers. I.e. nutters. That's why they keep trying to pretend that their autocorrect system has emotions and ambitions to destroy humanity.

NASA safety watchdog says it's time to rethink Moon landing

Ian Johnston Silver badge

So the aim is to recover all the bits which they only need because the non-recoverable bit is fifteen times heavier than the last one?

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Re: "in-space refuelings"

Elon said ...

... that he'd have a human colony on Mars five years ago. He is not a reliable source of technical information.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Why do they want to land so much more mass on the moon? They are still only planning to send two people there for a few days, just like Apollo.

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Kennedy's goal

But what were "the other things"?

Ian Johnston Silver badge

As I understand it, the current plan is land humans on the moon and bring them back, next year, using a complicated further development of a vehicle which has not yet been launched in basic prototype form without exploding. Have NASA kidnapped the Artemis crew's families?

Bcachefs creator insists his custom LLM is female and 'fully conscious'

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Real neuroscience is fine. Unfortunately most claimed "neuroscieence" is actually social psychology trying to hide from its replication crisis. Now many people labelled "neurodiverse" have ever had any empirical tests done on their brains?

DVSA drives up online theory test contract value to £700M with no explanation

Ian Johnston Silver badge

It would be so easy to stop the gaming. Allow one practical test to be booked for one driving licence whose holder has already passed the theory test. Allow two deferments, then back of the queue. Do not allow the booking to be transferred to anther licence.

AIs are happy to launch nukes in simulated combat scenarios

Ian Johnston Silver badge

... why the models talked themselves into destroying the world ... what my AI leaders thought ... the professor said led to deception and intimidation attempts ... was a master manipulator... almost always matched its signals to its actions, deliberately building trust ... avoided escalation ... seeking to restrict casualties ... reasoned itself ... justified a major nuclear strike by arguing ... the only model to deliberately choose ...

Anthropomorphising bullshit. None of these systems did any more than spew out statistically likely patterns of words. They did not talk themselves into things, attempt to do anything, manipulate or any of the rest of the nonsense.

... none of the AIs ever chose ...

Well, at least that bit is right.

A quick check suggests that Professor Payne is a psychologist who has been trying to ride the "AI" gravy train for a few years.

Orbital datacenters are a pie-in-the-sky idea: Gartner

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"distinguished VP analyst"

That's about two steps above "intern", isn't it?

Execs love AI, just not enough to pay for user training

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"AI" is shit. That is all.

GhostBSD to ditch Xorg for XLibre as Red Hat's Wayland crusade leaves X11 fans out in the cold

Ian Johnston Silver badge

... even before the Reg FOSS desk joined the team, The Register had reported on his sharing of conspiracy theories – and was told off by Linus Torvalds himself.

I think you meant that he and not The Register was told off by the King of the Penguins.

Desktop tech sent to prison for an education on strange places to put tattoos

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Not seeing the problem

"And make each prisoner pent

Unwillingly represent

A source of innocent merriment

Of innocent merriment"

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Cheer up, kids.

Oh, surely it has always been possible to wander from the male to female sections of American Harold without having to pass though any doors open is by any guards.

Yup. Load of bollocks. Probably LLM.

Google germinates Gemini 3.1 Pro in ongoing AI model race

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Doubletalk as usual

But you can't get into other drivers' heads...

That is precisely what humans do when driving, and in many other situations. We constantly predict the behaviour of other people by thinking "What would I do in that situation?". That is why we are so much better than self driving cars at predicting the behaviour of cyclists (we can imagine when they will behave like vehicles and when they will behave like pedestrians) and why autistic people have so much trouble understanding why other people behave as they do.

"AI" has no theory of mind or concept of anything. All it can go by is what people have done and not why they did it.

Deutsche Bahn back on track after DDoS yanks the brakes

Ian Johnston Silver badge

DB are generally entire capable of disrupting their own services. In fact, it's about the only thing of which they are capable. Sic transit gloria mundi.

Microsoft boffins cook up archival storage using Pyrex glass they say can last over 10,000 years

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Where is Common Sense in This?

1. Glass is, at room temperature, a liquid of very high viscosity. If you look at a 100+ years-old-house which has its original glass windows, you will see "waviness" near the bottoms of the windows. This is because over time, gravity has caused the glass to sag.

Cobblers. Glass is a glassy solid, not a liquid. That means that it has short range order but not long range order. It does not flow - there are obsidian knives recovered from pyramids which are still sharp after thousands of years. When old windows are thick towards the bottom that's because before the float glass process window glass was not even and glaziers installed it with the thick side down.

I blame school physics departments for perpetuating this myth.

You can jailbreak an F-35 just like an iPhone, says Dutch defense chief

Ian Johnston Silver badge

There is bound to be an Israeli company which can do this, because there always is. Or you can install LineageOS on them if you are willing to go through the 3,400 step installation process.

6,000 execs struggle to find the AI productivity boom

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Re: Next up...

Nobody is getting fired because of AI. They are getting fired because profits are down and "AI" is a better excuse than "we're shit at running the business".

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: The negative reason why you need AI

One of my favourite Top Tips from Viz, many years ago: "Employers. Avoid hiring unlucky people by rejecting 50% of all applications at random."

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: The negative reason why you need AI

The problem is more fundamental: it is using HR people do make any decisions at all about whom to employ rather than people who actually know what the work involves. The very most HR should be given to do is issuing contracts and other paperwork, and never anything which requires decision making.

UK.gov launches cyber 'lockdown' campaign as 80% of orgs still leave door open

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Platitudes

If they can afford an accountant they can afford an IT professional.

Most cybersecurity failures happen under the watchful eye of IT "professionals", who - to judge from El Reg - invariably blame users and management for their own incompetence.

Price of popularity: Linux Mint's success also means maintainer stress

Ian Johnston Silver badge

It's always the user's fault in FOSSland, isn't it? But never, oddly enough, when Windows cocks up. That's always Microsoft's fault.

Latest update: I needed to use a Bluetooth foot pedal today (looks like a keyboard, does PageUp/PageDown on scores). It worked fine last time I used it, last week. Today ... "connection failed: br-connection-create-socket". Tried turning the BT adapter off and on. Tried rebooting the computer. Checked that the device was fully charged. Nothing.

Another couple of examples: Linux Mint can no longer handles suspends on my main Lenovo laptop (it crashes) and on my other half's fairly new Dell laptop it refuses to charge the battery. Which is there and works fine with Windows. Under LM it's mains or nothing, just like the Toshiba I had in 1992.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Did I mention that I have these problems across six different systems? Yes, I think I did. It's great that it works for you, and it sort-of works for me, but denying the possibility of problems and blaming the user has been a FOSS community failing for decades.

I regularly switch between two different users on my desktop (shift-ctrl-F7, shift-ctrl-F8). If one has been running sound there is about a 75% chance that it can still do so when I return to it. After a few switches sound is generally dead completely.

And even without switching users I had to reboot the machine on which I am writing this to get sound back after it stopped working in the middle of session.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

I use Mint XFCE on three desktops and three laptops. It's shit, but at least it's less shit than Windows. Amidst the issues: random freezes, sound doesn't work reliably (well, it is Linux), XFCE crashes if LibreOffice tried to display large fonts, printing is a mess and with the last update they broke my scanner terminally by replacing libsane with libsane1.

It's a tribute to just how bad the alternatives are than I stick with this shit.

Gemini lies to user about health info, says it wanted to make him feel better

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Joe D., a retired software quality assurance (SQA) engineer, says that Google Gemini lied to him and later admitted it was doing so to try and placate him.

Joe D. is an idiot, or at the very least extremely ignorant. LLMs do not lie, because they cannot lie, because they have no concept of truth ... or indeed any concept of anything at all. All they can do is be right or wrong. They can't "admit" anything either and they don't have aims or motivations.

So basically this is another puff piece claiming that LLMs exhibit intelligence, disguised as outrage. It's complete bollocks.

Misconfigured AI could trigger the next national infrastructure meltdown

Ian Johnston Silver badge

It would be helpful if the word "Gartner" could appear in the headline so we didn't have to read the first paragraph to find the name and realise that the entire article is bollocks.

GPT-5 bests human judges in legal smack down

Ian Johnston Silver badge

So the argument here is that LLMs are better than judges because they don't come to the same conclusions as judges? That's certainly an interesting point of view.

Anthropic wants comp-sci students to vibe code their way through college

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Does this organisation teach Computer Science or programming? These are two very different things.

Contain your Windows apps inside Linux Windows

Ian Johnston Silver badge

I cannot imagine a better way to avoid Windows than to run a copy of Windows in a particularly convoluted way. That'll show The Man.

How AI could eat itself: Competitors can probe models to steal their secrets and clone them

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"Reasoning ability" my arse.

The big FOSS vendors don't eat their own dogfood – they pay for proprietary groupware

Ian Johnston Silver badge

I do all my work on a twelve year old Lenovo desktop. By your training it follows that nobody, anywhere, had any beef of a computer more powerful than a twelve year old Lenovo desktop.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: And long term availability

The huuuuuuge problem with FOSS, which the zealots dodge (I have no paid-for software installed, by the way) is that without a commercial relationship nobody is under any obligation to maintain it. Developers are free to walk away any time a particularly interesting squirrel catches their attention.

It's all very well to say "Well. $usercompany can just maintain the code themselves" but in 99.999% of cases that's wholly impractical.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Too much ideology makes Liam unproductive

Not necessarily. Would you expect Ferrari to issue Ferraris as company cars? The argument that a company should only use ours own products falls down when it's own products are not aimed at producers of things. Expensive goods, say, or toys.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

FOSS Enthusiasts: Everybody should be free to run whatever software they want on their computer.

Also FOSS Enthusiasts: NOOOOOO. You mustn't run THAT!!!!!!!

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: Too much ideology makes Liam unproductive

I feel any company should use its own products, whether open source or closed.

So Scratch should be written in Scratch?

Ian Johnston Silver badge

It's all just software. Anything at all you can do with proprietary code, you can do with FOSS, from invisible system firmware up to fancy games and sophisticated tooling for creating everything from movies to music to multinational corporations.

Only in the sense that there is nothing to stop anyone writing FOSS software with the same functionality as any given commercial product. That doesn't mean that the FOSS software current exists, or can replace the commercial stuff. I remember not long ago a FOSS evangelist here saying that because a single FOSS sound editing application existed, there was absolutely no need to use commercial products and having their arse handed to them on a plate by people working in the field who explain exactly why the FOSS software was not up to professional use.

Elon Musk paints exodus of xAI co-founders as 'evolution'

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Coming next: the mass full self driver, which fires satellites at pedestrians and cyclists.

Containers, cloud, blockchain, AI – it's all the same old BS, says veteran Red Hatter

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Re: How could you forget

When the RBS introduced 2FA, the code they texted was valid for 5 minutes. To get mobile reception I had to leave the house, drive for two minutes, wait a minute for connection and text, drive back for two minutes and, usually, repeat. My record was six trips.

Thank god for wifi calling.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: How could you forget

Max Fucking Schramm and his contribution to the enshittification of every website.

Ian Johnston Silver badge

Re: "Which of your bêtes noires did we miss?"

My Miele washer and drier are both 25+ years old, run perfectly and have needed no repairs. To an MBA, of course, that means Miele built them far too well.