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The simultaneous assassinations of leading 2024 presidential contenders Donald J. Trump and Robert F. Kennedy Jr. has stunned the nation. Perhaps inevitably, conspiracy theories have been circulating on social media almost as fast as they can be removed by trust-and-safety experts.
All scientists and fact-checkers agree that those conspiracy theories are baseless and unsubstantiated. According to ballistics experts, the bullet that traversed Trump’s skull at Mar-a-Lago, turned 180 degrees, and traveled over 2500 miles to Malibu, California, shattering RFK Jr.’s kitchen window and penetrating his chest, has been recovered from a stretcher and subjected to painstaking analysis. That bullet, it turns out, was fired from one of the worst rifles ever manufactured by a mediocre marksman crouched in the window of the School Book Depository building in Dallas, Texas. The lone assassin—a Palestinian anti-vaxxer and anti-Semitic conspiracy theorist named Sirhan Oswald Sirhan—hated Trump and Kennedy because they loved Israel.
Speaking from his home in San Francisco, political assassination expert Gerald Posner supported the ballistics experts and attacked conspiracy theorists as “paranoid lunatics.” Posner explained: “Everyone knows that bullets can traverse human bodies, make sharp turns, and traverse other human bodies. The bullet that killed Trump and RFK Jr., as it turns out, wasn’t even that special. Other bullets, like the one that struck JFK and Governor Connolly in Dallas sixty years ago, have made multiple sharp turns in order to pierce different people in numerous anatomical areas. This one only had to turn twice. It also only had to go through human flesh and bone twice. As magic bullets go, it was pretty ordinary.”
Asked about the seemingly improbable distance the bullet had to travel, Posner explained that if Oswald could hit JFK from 265 feet, and Sirhan could put a powder burn around the bullet hole in the back of RFK Sr.’s head from ten feet in front, it shouldn’t be surprising that assassins occasionally manage to shoot their targets from distances and positions that seem surprising to the untrained observer. “The important thing is that the experts agree that it happened. And if it did happen, that means it could happen,” Posner said. “Case closed.”
The assassination expert added that people who find it odd that the two leading anti-Establishment candidates were struck down at the same time, by the same bullet, are victims of a well-known psychological phenomenon involving the need for order and security: “Crazy, random stuff happens all the time. But some people can’t handle randomness. Their powerful desire for meaning and order leads them to imagine conspiracies where, in reality, there are only coincidences.”
Conspiracy theorists, whose internet and phone service has been coincidentally cut off, could not be reached for comment.
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sirhan oswald sirhan? are you sending us a message? blink three times quickly, followed by three long blinks and three quick again, if they holding you against your will.
RFK Sr. was killed by a stray bullet fired in Dallas that had circled the globe for years, likely with the connivance of NASA Jews. As every proctologist has heard “I have no idea how it got in there.”
They’re being silenced by the Deep State and slandered by the Media. Rogue politicians don’t need to be killed anymore, as Trump should have found out in his 4 years as POTUS. Don’t want to make them into martyrs.
Why would the deep state shoot their favorite poodles? If Honegger’s quote of CIA director William Casey is real, with him saying that the CIA’s mission will be accomplished when everything the American people believe is false, how would that accomplishment appear to an observer? Would there still be political leaders capable of leading masses of people to the truth? Obviously not! It is not sufficient for only one side of a debate to be spurious. That means that all political opposition must be controlled and corrupted with disinformation! Both sides of every debate must become a limited hangout that obscures and denies reality. Then the CIA’s work will be done.
Looking forward to hearing more of your thoughts on extraterrestrials. /s
Kayfabe.
That’s kind of funny in a black comedy way but seriously I hope President Trump and RFK Jr. don’t fail to take precautions.
There is , in the USA , enough nonsense broadcast about Islam , but I’m sure we’d like to hear yours, Kevin.
You can listen to hundreds of hours worth of my thoughts about Islam, and decide for yourself whether they are sense or nonsense, at: https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCtlNsSL2_x4MVTwFfRGPmqw/community
They call them “Coincidence Theorists”
“Truth is a wall that you can’t blow down and it won’t be laughed away.” – Harry Chapin
……still no Dallas Cowboys at the Alamo.
Brilliant and darkly hilarious!
Although the details will vary somewhat, this is precisely how we will be gaslighted by the controlled media should either or both of these candidates become too much of a threat to the Deep State.
In the Bible, King Nebuchadnezzar of Babylon put a Jew in charge and went mad, leaving the kingdom to be administered by that particular Jew. The story may be apocryphal but it does seem to have served as a road map for what has followed.
The Roman Emperor Constantine put a ‘Christian’ Jew in charge of creating a state religion, and also went mad.
King George III of England put a Jew in charge of the Bank of England, and also went mad.
The American President Woodrow Wilson put a Jew in charge of the White House, and had a crippling stroke that left him all but paralyzed while the Jew put the ‘House’ in order.
Now we’ve got a senile President who happens to be surrounded by Jews. No need to slip a slow-acting brain-rotting poison into his drinks — the goyim figurehead comes pre-brain-damaged!
Can RFK Jr. keep every Jew in the world at arm’s length? I doubt he’ll even try. Because it would be Anti-Semitic to suspect betrayal from a culture that preaches racial supremacism, practices infant sex mutilation, and celebrates genocide.
So I expect at some point they’ll mess with him by doctoring his food, infecting him with a brain-destroying virus, or using some kind of x-ray gun to cause brain cancer. You may call this the ranting of an insane conspiracy theory. I call it twenty-first century technology.
Anyhow, once elected, he’s going to start acting irrational — but his seemingly random behavior will improbably always be in service to Jewish power.
No need to destroy the body when you can destroy the mind.
LOL! But seriously, perhaps you could get a grant from the Rothschild bank for such creative thinking.
War Profiteers and Israel’s Bank
https://warprofiteerstory.blogspot.com/p/war-profiteers-and-israels-bank.html
We really need for the Russians and Chinese to nuke D.C., Langley, Quantico and Silicon Valley.
And between the Chinese brokered peace deal between the Shiite and Sunni blocs in the MidEast and our southern border collapsing, I hope enough suicide bombers slip through and blow the shit out of every Fake News organ.
Because despite a heavily armed populace, most of our countrymen are fat, cowardly, apathetic slobs.