英語に詳しい方、Writngの添削をお願いします。 内容 構成 語彙 文法 それぞれ4点、計16点で 点数もつけていただくとありがたいです。 Should young children have their own cell phones? I think that it is too early for children to have cell phones. The reasons are described in the following sentences. The first reason is that considering cost is very important in today's society. High expenses, such as providing children with technical skills can place a heavy burden on individuals. In addition, these financial pressures may discourage people or organizations from taking useful actions. As a result, controlling such costs can support both consumers and the whole society. The second reason is that human society is complex, and it cannot be explained by one factor alone. Social elements such as their social skills often create challenges that simple solutions cannot fix. Therefore, focusing only on a single aspect will not ensure balanced development. In conclusion, children should spend most of their time without cell phones.
