WaPoã®Wonkblogã§Roberto FerdmanãããInhibited from Bowling Aloneï¼å¤ç¬ãªãã¦ãªã³ã°ã®ææ¢ï¼ãã¨ãããããã¼ãã»ããããã ã®ãå¤ç¬ãªãã¦ãªã³ã°âç±³å½ã³ãã¥ããã£ã®å´©å£ã¨åçããæèããã¿ã¤ãã«ã®è«æã紹介しているï¼H/T タイラー・コーエンï¼ãè«æã®èè
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"When you compare an experience that is very similar with or without someone else, like visiting a gallery or going to a movie, you find little difference in enjoyment," said Hamilton. "Going to a restaurant might be a little different, because there's that element of conversation, but that doesn't preclude the reality that going to a restaurant alone is still enjoyable."
Indeed, the question isn't whether we're going to have more fun doing something with friends rather than not. It's about those times when we don't have someone to see a new movie with, or eat at a newly opened restaurant, and there's discomfort about going by ourselves, even though we'd probably have a fine time.
"The reality is that you're foregoing a lot of fun," said Ratner. "We all are."
Why? Ratner says it's mostly because we're overly self-conscious.
"The reason is we think we won't have fun because we're worried about what other people will think," said Ratner. "We end up staying at home instead of going out to do stuff because we're afraid others will think they're a loser."
But other people, as it turns out, actually aren't thinking about us quite as judgmentally or intensely as we tend to anticipate. Not nearly, in fact. There's a long line of research that shows how consistently and regularly we overestimate others' interest in our affairs. The phenomenon is so well known that there is even a name for it in psychology: the spotlight effect. A 2000 study conducted by Thomas Gilovich found that people regularly adjust their actions to account for the perspective of others, even though their actions effectively go unnoticed. Many other researchers have since confirmed the pattern of egocentric thinking that skews how we act.
"If we get people to see that itâs okay to do something for pleasure on their own thatâs the way to get rid of the stigma," Hamilton said.
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