TV

The X Factor

  1. Episode 26 LIVE Season Finale, Part 2 of 2
    The X Factor Finale Recap: Wonderful, Wonderful Stuff We have a winner.
  2. Episode 24 LIVE Results Show #7
    The X Factor Recap: And Then There Were Three It’s time to face … the … hour of television that has .75 seconds of action in it.
  3. Episode 23 LIVE Performance Show #7 - Top 4 Perform
    The X Factor Recap: The One Without Rachel You are not history’s greatest monster, Nicole! There are probably ten or eleven who are worse.
  4. Episode 22 Live Results Show #6
    The X Factor Recap: Witness the Most Excruciating Moment on Reality TV Nice job, Nicole. Way to punch a Muppet in the face.
  5. Episode 21 Live Performance Show #6
    The X Factor Recap: Dave Holmes Reports From Inside the Theater You get the sense that the warm-up comic has one of those bombs from Speed attached to his midsection, and if there is a moment that doesn’t sound like a soccer riot, he will explode.
  6. Episode 21 LIVE Season Finale, Part 1 of 2
    The X Factor Recap: Five Million Dollars’ Worth of Integrity “This show isn’t about hitting all the notes.”
  7. Episode 20 LIVE Results Show #5 - 2 of 7 Voted Off
    The X Factor Recap: Don’t Stop Till You Get Enough Michael Jackson “Smile, girl.”
  8. Episode 19 LIVE Performance Show #5
    The X Factor Recap: Let’s Re-Mangle Michael Jackson! Blanket’s in the audience for his dad’s “tribute,” and he’s not having any of it.
  9. Episode 18 LIVE Results Show #4
    The X Factor Recap: Deadlock Graphic Tonight, The X Factor is celebrating Thanksgiving.
  10. Episode 17 LIVE Performance Show #4
    The X Factor Recap: Tasting Notes Either I am drunk or Paula told them, “You … are … grapefruit.”
  11. Episode 16 LIVE Results Show #3
    The X Factor Recap: Simon Goes In Astro does not take it well.
  12. Episode 15 LIVE Performance Show #3
    The X Factor Recap: Fantastic or Train Wreck It’s ROCK NIGHT.
  13. Episode 14
    The X Factor: Every Second Is a Highlight What is the leather-catsuit age of consent in the state of California?
  14. Episode 13 LIVE Performance Show #2
    The X Factor Recap: From the Movies, Loosely Defined “Don’t hate, just congratulate.”
  15. Episode 12
    The X Factor Recap: Nightmare Situation “I don’t … know … how … America is going to … choose … who … their favorites.”
  16. Episode 11 Finalists Revealed
    The X Factor Recap: The 30 Degree Angle “You can rely on the old man’s money … because you gotta have faith.”
  17. Episode 11 Live Performance Show 1
    The X Factor Recap: Whoops, the Judges Forgot It Was a Singing Competition Again! The judges almost completely ignore the noises coming from the stage, which were sometimes the wrong noises.
  18. Episode 10 Judges’ Homes, Part 3
    The X Factor Recap: Seventeen Finalists, 32 Fake-Outs Simon and Paula have taught L.A. and Nicole the “I’m sorry to say … you’re not NOT not going forward” trick.
  19. Episode 8 Judges’ Homes, Part 2
    The X Factor Recap: Wait! It’s Actually Starting to Get Fun! Still too long, sure, but this week we saw glimmers of what this show could be.
  20. Episode 7 Judges’ Homes, Part 1
    The X Factor Recap: Rihanna, Pharell, and Enrique Iglesias Swing By for a Cup of Sugar The judges enlist a little help in the “pretending these people have talent” department.
  21. Episode 6 Final 32 Revealed
    The X Factor Recap: Who Gets to Go to Paula’s House? The final 32 are announced, and those being teamed with coach Paula better be ready to take off their shoes.
  22. Episode 5 Boot Camp, Night 1
    The X Factor Recap: Boot Camp Means Group Mangling of Pop Songs! And some people who hope to professionally make noise with their mouths have never heard Radiohead’s “Creep.”
  23. Episode 4 Final Auditions
    The X Factor Recap: Finally, the End of Audition Road (Located Just Off Fake Suspense Avenue) “Without the power of fast forward, I feel like I’m serving some kind of jazzy jury duty.”
  24. Episode 3 Chicago and Seattle Auditions
    The X Factor Recap: Face the Wedding D.J.’s Music Holding auditions in Chicago means meeting thousands of people who’ve been asked to retake level one at Second City.
  25. Episode 2 Miami and Dallas Auditions
    The X Factor Recap: Dave Holmes on Joke Auditions and a Singing Ghost-Hunter ’The X Factor’ actually managed to surprise Holmes at least twice, and he doesn’t know how to feel about it.
  26. Episode 1 Newark and Seattle auditions
    The X Factor Recap: Dave Holmes Tries to Figure Out How This Is Not American Idol The judges drink Pepsi instead of Coke, and Paula never vomited at the sight of a penis on ‘Idol.’
  1. Episode 27 Season Finale, Part 2
    The X Factor Recap: And That’s a Wrap Simon Cowell, you stole two hours of our lives with the X Factor season finale.
  2. Episode 26 Season Finale, Part 1
    The X Factor Recap: It’s the End of the World and I Feel Drowsy You guys, The X Factor is almost over!
  3. Episode 24 Live Results Show #6
    The X Factor Recap: Britney Does Not Approve A better host on a better show would have asked Brit why she gave the gas face.
  4. Episode 24 Top Finalists Perform #6
    X Factor Recap: They Have Got to NAIL THIS ONE This show feels like a situation. A condition. A predicament.
  5. Episode 23 LIVE Results Show #5
    The X Factor Recap: Good Night, Sweet Princesses Once you have visited the X Factor VIP Tent, it is difficult to come back down to earth.
  6. Episode 22 Top Finalists Perform Live Show #5
    The X Factor Recap: From the Belly of the Beast In which we watch the episode from the VIP tent.
  7. Episode 21 Live Results Show #4
    The X Factor Recap: Wow. Phenomenal. Between Mario Lopez, Khloe Kardashian, and Britney Spears, The X Factor is the world’s leading producer of fixed, joyless smiles.
  8. Episode 20 Top Finalists Perform Live Show #4
    The X Factor Recap: Scream, Shout, Stall So we are down to our top eight here on The X Factor, yet the performance shows are still two hours long.
  9. Episode 19 Live Results Show #3
    The X Factor Recap: Thanksgiving Massacre We wrote this with an elephant-tranquilizer level of tryptophan still coursing through our stiffened arteries.
  10. Episode 18 Top Finalists Perform Live Show #3
    The X Factor Recap: So Grateful For some reason, there are two episodes this Thanksgiving week.
  11. Episode 17 Live Results Show #2
    The X Factor Recap: Double Unhappiness It was a double elimination night, folks!
  12. Episode 16 Top Finalists Perform Live Show #2
    The X Factor Recap: Songs by the Divas Let me grab my X-Factorese-to-English dictionary. Oh, here we go; that means “songs sung by people who have sung songs.”
  13. Episode 15 Live Results Show #1
    The X Factor Recap: Decision 2012 The synopsis of last night’s episode read: “a number of contestants are sent home.” But how many?
  14. Episode 12 Wildcard - Part 1
    The X Factor Recap: Tank It, Bro Fate has never been kind to The X Factor, but in the last couple of weeks, it’s just been straight-up cruel.
  15. Episode 11 Judges’ Homes #2
    The X Factor Recap: Going Home Would Really Blow This is the episode, sort of, that we were supposed to see last week, but then baseball happened.
  16. Episode 10 Judge’s House #1
    The X Factor Recap: Home Visits It’s off to the judges’ giant houses.
  17. Episode 9 Boot Camp #3
    The X Factor Recap: Now We’re Getting Somewhere Last day of boot camp, y’all.
  18. Episode 8 Boot Camp #2
    The X Factor Recap: Pairing Off At the beginning of last night’s episode, 60 acts remained. Sixty.
  19. Episode 7 Boot Camp #1
    X Factor Recap: Sad Britney and a Missing Panda After what seems like twelve years, it’s time for BOOT CAMP.
  20. Episode 6 Auditions #6
    The X Factor Recap: Auditions Come to a Close Can it really be?
  21. Episode 5 Auditions #5
    The X Factor Recap: Britney’s Got Jokes They have to fill out episodes somehow.
  22. Episode 4 Auditions #4
    The X Factor Recap: Pepsi Ambassadors These early X Factor episodes are a tough slog.
  23. Episode 3 Auditions #3
    The X Factor Recap: Panda Has Pneumonia That didn’t stop her from singing amazingly, though.
  24. Episode 2 Auditions #2
    The X Factor Recap: Hot People With Bad Voices An endless parade of singers have pleasing faces but make terrible mouth-sounds.
  25. Episode 1 Auditions #1
    The X Factor Recap: And So We Begin Again They’ve made a couple of changes, in case you hadn’t heard.

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