Gossip Girl (Original)

  1. Episode 18 Much ‘I Do’ About Nothing
    Gossip Girl Recap: Much ‘I Do’ About Nothing Gossip Girl ditches us the morning after.
  2. Episode 17 Woman On The Verge
    Gossip Girl Recap: Woman On The Verge Gossip Girl gives us the high of our so called lives.
  3. Episode 16 All About My Brother
    Gossip Girl Recap: All About My Brother Gossip Girl blows our minds.
  4. Episode 15 Desperately Seeking Serena
    Gossip Girl Recap: Desperately Seeking Serena Gossip Girl blinds us with color, evil.
  5. Episode 14 The Blair Bitch Project
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Blair Bitch Project The gang is back from spring break, and everything’s changed.
  6. Episode 13 The Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Thin Line Between Chuck and Nate In which we finally say those three little words to Gossip Girl.
  7. Episode 12 School Lies
    Gossip Girl Recap: School Lies Gossip Girl takes us back to the future.
  8. Episode 11 Roman Holiday
    Gossip Girl Recap: Roman Holiday A Very Gossip Girl Christmas!
  9. Episode 10 Hi, Society
    Gossip Girl Recap: Hi, Society Drunk with power (and Tanqueray), CeCe stole the shit out of episode ten.
  10. Episode 9 Blair Waldorf Must Pie!
    Gossip Girl Recap: Blair Waldorf Must Pie! Who writes this show? Former members of the Children of God?
  11. Episode 8 Seventeen Candles
    Gossip Girl Recap: Seventeen Candles It’s Blair’s birthday, and perhaps because she’s a year older, we realize we’ve grown very fond of her.
  12. Episode 7 Victor, Victrola
    Gossip Girl Recap: Victor, Victrola Like a high-school girl on Halloween, Gossip Girl loves nothing more than an excuse to don a skimpy costume and slut around.
  13. Episode 6 The Handmaiden’s Tale
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Handmaiden’s Tale Nate’s dad does blow! A lot of it.
  14. Episode 5 Dare Devil
    Gossip Girl Recap: Dare Devil Gossip Girl gets lost in New York.
  15. Episode 4 Bad News Blair
    Gossip Girl Recap: Bad News Blair Gossip Girl embraces friendships, reality
  16. Episode 3 Poison Ivy
    Gossip Girl Recap: Poison Ivy It’s Ivy Week for the girls at Constance Billard and the boys of St. Jude’s.
  17. Episode 2 The Wild Brunch
    Gosisp Girl Recap: The Wild Brunch Gossip Girl goes straight to the O.C. Place.
  18. Episode 1 Pilot
    Gossip Girl Recap: Pilot The most important show of our time.
  1. Episode 25 The Goodbye Gossip Girl
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Goodbye Gossip Girl There’s some Georgina Ex Machina in the season two finale.
  2. Episode 23 Valley Girls
    Gossip Girl Recap: Valley Girls Flashback to the ‘80s.
  3. Episode 23 The Wrath of Con
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Wrath of Con Gossip Girl explains it all.
  4. Episode 22 Southern Gentlemen Prefer Blondes
  5. Episode 21 Seder Anything
    Gossip Girl Recap: Seder Anything It’s Passover, and this one’s all about redemption.
  6. Episode 20 Remains of the J
    Gossip Girl Recap: Remains of the J Gossip Girl faces a dilemma.
  7. Episode 19 The Grandfather
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Grandfather A needed return to basics.
  8. Episode 18 The Age of Dissonance
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Age of Dissonance Gossip Girl’s plot is like the weather: one moment we’re basking in the sun, the next we’re boiling hot.
  9. Episode 17 Carnal Knowledge
    Gossip Girl Recap: Carnal Knowledge Gossip Girl meets Stanley Kubrick.
  10. Episode 16 You’ve Got Yale!
    Gossip Girl Recap: You’ve Got Yale! After last episode’s tsunami of plot twists, we get to see some of them through.
  11. Episode 15 Gone with the Will
    Gossip Girl Recap: Gone with the Will In which the show realizes it has a penis.
  12. Episode 14 In the Realm of the Basses
    Gossip Girl Recap: In the Realm of the Basses A pretty good one, even if we did want to slap the pinstripes right off of Uncle Jack the whole time
  13. Episode 13 O Brother, Where Bart Thou?
    Gossip Girl Recap: O Brother, Where Bart Thou? We go through the first two stages of grief.
  14. Episode 12 It’s a Wonderful Lie
    Gossip Girl Recap: It’s a Wonderful Lie A chilly night in Gossip Girl country.
  15. Episode 11 The Magnificent Archibalds
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Magnificent Archibalds It’s Thanksgiving, and we will try to set aside petty material grievances to instead focus on the things there were to be thankful for in this episode
  16. Episode 9 There Might Be Blood
    Gossip Girl Recap: There Might Be Blood Gossip Girl gets its stuff muffed.
  17. Episode 8 Pret-a-Poor-J
    Gossip Girl Recap: Pret-a-Poor-J Gossip Girl leaves us writhing with excruciating pleasure.
  18. Episode 7 Chuck in Real Life
    Gossip Girl Recap: Chuck in Real Life Everyone’s just trying to find their place.
  19. Episode 6 New Haven Can Wait
    Gossip Girl Recap: New Haven Can Wait College trips get catty, and completely unrealistic.
  20. Episode 5 The Serena Also Rises
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Serena Also Rises An episode that’s a testament to Leighton Meester’s acting.
  21. Episode 4 The Ex Files
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Ex Files Gossip Girl tosses a nairtini in our faces.
  22. Episode 3 The Dark Night
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Dark Night Gossip Girl gets more Lynchian than ever before.
  23. Episode 2 Never Been Marcused
    Gossip Girl Recap: Never Been Marcused Gossip Girl is royally pimpin’.
  24. Episode 1 Summer, Kind of Wonderful
    Gossip Girl Recap: Summer, Kind of Wonderful Gossip Girl says “Chuck You” to true love.
  1. Episode 22 Last Tango, Then Paris
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Season Finale Our weekly recap of the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  2. Episode 21 Ex Husbands and Wives
    Gossip Girl Recap: All Angst All the Time Our weekly recap of the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  3. Episode 20 It’s a Dad, Dad, Dad World
    Gossip Girl Recap: High, or Yeast Infection? Our weekly recap of the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  4. Episode 19 Dr. Estrangeloved
    Gossip Girl Recap: Unclench Our weekly reality index for the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  5. Episode 18 The Unblairable Lightness of Being
    Gossip Girl Recap: Even Good Love Goes Bad Our weekly reality index.
  6. Episode 17 Inglorious Bassterds
    Gossip Girl Recap: Love Is a Battlefield Our weekly reality index for the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  7. Episode 16 The Empire Strikes Jack
    Gossip Girl Recap: Second Second Chances? Our weekly reality index for the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  8. Episode 15 The Sixteen-Year-Old-Virgin
  9. Episode 14 The Lady Vanished
    Gossip Girl Recap: A Leaf From the Trust Tree This week’s reality index for the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  10. Episode 13 The Hurt Locket
  11. Episode 12 The Debarted
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Debarted Gossip Girl is the Jackie and you are the Marilyn.
  12. Episode 11 The Treasure of Serena Madre
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Treasure of Serena Madre Going overboard on convenient coincidences.
  13. Episode 10 The Last Days of Disco Stick
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Last Days of Disco Stick A little bit of danger makes Gossip Girl’s life worth saving.
  14. Episode 9 They Shoot Humphreys, Don’t They?
    Gossip Girl Recap: They Shoot Humphreys, Don’t They? Gossip Girl is the last person in New York who thinks you still matter.
  15. Episode 8 The Grandfather: Part II
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Grandfather Part II Gossip Girl loses her moral compass.
  16. Episode 7 How to Succeed in Bassness
    Gossip Girl Recap: How to Succeed in Bassness It’s Halloween, but the masks our characters are wearing aren’t just festive strips of silicone donned for a night of carousing.
  17. Episode 6 Enough About Eve
    Gossip Girl Recap: Enough About Eve Gossip Girl fastens its seatbelts.
  18. Episode 5 Rufus Getting Married
    Gossip Girl Recap: Rufus Getting Married Finally, people start acting like they have real brains.
  19. Episode 4 Dan de Fleurette
    Gossip Girl: Dan de Fleurette Gossip Girl remembers who she is.
  20. Episode 3 The Lost Boy
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Lost Boy Everyone’s got trust issues.
  21. Episode 2 The Freshman
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Freshman Georgina’s up to no good.
  22. Episode 1 Reversals of Fortune
    Gossip Girl Recap: Reversals of Fortune It’s all about new beginnings in the season three premiere.
  1. Episode 22 The Wrong Way
    Gossip Girl Recap: Maybe We’re Growing Up After All On ‘Gossip Girl,’ everything grows, except the length of Serena’s skirts.
  2. Episode 21 Shattered Bass
    Gossip Girl Recap: From Well to Hell That could describe the plot, or the show itself.
  3. Episode 20 The Princess and the Frog
  4. Episode 19 Petty in Pink
    Gossip Girl Recap: Your Monitor Is Showing Botox, handies: Welcome back to the Upper East Side.
  5. Episode 18 The Kids Stay in the Picture
    Gossip Girl Recap: All I Ever Wanted Was a Simple Fairy Tale Alas, like the centuries-old folklore from which the popular Disney stories originally derived, fairy tales on the Upper East Side are more complicated.
  6. Episode 17 Empire of the Son
    Gossip Girl Recap: Your Precious Little Legacy Three fathers disappointed in last night’s episode — one did so from beyond the grave.
  7. Episode 16 While You Weren’t Sleeping
    Gossip Girl Recap: I Always Knew You Read Too Much Shakespeare to Be Sane Last night’s episode was like an ether flashback and a neurological disorder all at once.
  8. Episode 15 It-Girl Happened One Night
    Gossip Girl Recap: No One’s Going to Forget Tonight Family values are a little bit different on the Upper East Side.
  9. Episode 14 Panic Roomate
    Gossip Girl Recap: A Woman Always Remembers Except when it comes to her own mistakes, of course.
  10. Episode 13 Damian Darko
    Gossip Girl Recap: We Should Make This a Drinking Game In its fourth season, ‘Gossip Girl’ has developed a Shakespearean rhythm.
  11. Episode 12 The Kids Are Not All Right
    Gossip Girl Recap: I Wouldn’t Want Someone Like You, Wanting to Be Like Me Our weekly Reality Index returns from winter break.
  12. Episode 11 The Townie
    Gossip Girl Recap: Somewhere Between a Marlins Jersey and the Absolute Truth Several truths were revealed on this week’s episode of ‘Gossip Girl.’
  13. Episode 10 Gaslit
    Gossip Girl Recap: Thanksgiving Was Once My Favorite Holiday As is their tradition, the show drives us crazy with things that are hopelessly unrealistic, and at the same time includes details that make it uniquely true to life.
  14. Episode 9 The Witches of Bushwick
    Gossip Girl Recap: This Isn’t Exactly My First Masquerade Party But on the Upper East Side, just you’ve experienced something before, doesn’t mean you can’t fall for it again.
  15. Episode 8 Juliet Doesn’t Live Here Any More
  16. Episode 7 War at the Roses
    Gossip Girl Recap: A Good Party Gives People What They Don’t Expect You know what they say, if a piano is mentioned in the first act, somebody’s going to get off on it in the third.
  17. Episode 6 Easy J
  18. Episode 5 Goodbye, Columbia
    Gossip Girl Recap: I Almost Forgot How Much I Used to Enjoy Your Pie Love and anger on this week’s episode of ‘Gossip Girl.’
  19. Episode 4 A Touch of Eva
    Gossip Girl Recap: Everybody Leaves Love hurts, even when you’re Chuck Bass.
  20. Episode 3 The Undergraduates
    Gossip Girl Recap: How Do We Know What Matters If Gossip Girl Isn’t Around to Tell Us? Our weekly reality index for The Greatest Show of Our Time.
  21. Episode 2 Double Identity
    Gossip Girl Recap: It Takes More Than Even You to Destroy Blair Waldorf This week’s recap of The Greatest Show of Our Time.
  22. Episode 1 Belles Du Jour
    Gossip Girl Recap: We Make Our Own Fairy Tales The first reality index of the fourth season of the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  1. Episode 24 The Return of the Ring
    Gossip Girl Recap: I’d Hoped You’d Outgrown Such Behavior In some ways, it’s like we’ve gone back in time on the season-five finale.
  2. Episode 23 The Fugitives
    Gossip Girl Recap: Daddy Sang Bass In the second-to-last episode of the second-to-last (we think?) season of the Greatest Show of Our Time, everyone had a plan.
  3. Episode 22 Raiders of the Lost Art
    Gossip Girl Recap: No One Can Keep a Secret Like Eyes Wide Shut, but with cuddling.
  4. Episode 21 Despicable B
    Gossip Girl Recap: It’s Not Who’s My Mom, It’s Who’s My Dad New York’s Approval Matrix makes a star cameo in this week’s episode.
  5. Episode 20 Salon of the Dead
    Gossip Girl Recap: From Hapsburg to Williamsburg Mason jars. Pork buns. Pickling festivals. GG goes Brooklyn.
  6. Episode 19 It Girl, Interrupted
    Gossip Girl Recap: It Is Your Destiny to Be Gossip-Worthy It would be beneficial to all of the characters on Gossip Girl if they began looking at their world from a Humphrological perspective.
  7. Episode 18 Con-Heir
    Gossip Girl Recap: There’s Only One Blogger in This Town Who Matters Last night, we returned from our monthlong hiatus to find a world that has been turned upside down: The Van Der Woodsens have been exiled to Brooklyn.
  8. Episode 16 Cross Rhodes
    Gossip Girl Recap: ‘I’m a Sadist, Not a Masochist’ “We have feelings, but we can suppress them, stomp them out like bugs.”
  9. Episode 15 Crazy, Cupid, Love
    Gossip Girl Recap: ‘Oh No. This Is Very Bad Plan.’ “Have a good day!” “I doubt that.”
  10. Episode 14 The Backup Dan
  11. Episode 13 G.G.
    Gossip Girl Recap: Jesus Owes Me One “If I ever cried, I’d be moved to tears.”
  12. Episode 12 Father and the Bride
    Gossip Girl Recap: There’s a Fine Line Between Surveillance and Stalking “It’s like a Henry the Fourth kind of structure, a Falstaff thing, but he’s addicted to the drunken revelry of the West, so it’s set on a cattle ranch … ”
  13. Episode 11 The End of the Affair?
    Gossip Girl Recap: We Used to Be Your Priority The deus ex machina is actually … Deus. Oh Lord.
  14. Episode 10 Riding in Town Cars with Boys
    Gossip Girl Recap: If You Decided to Be That Person, Own It and Never Look Back “The last time I saw you concentrating that hard, you were looking at the instructions on how to assemble a hookah.”
  15. Episode 9 Rhodes to Perdition
    Gossip Girl Recap: What Is It That You’re Searching For? Chuck is doing yoga in a dress shirt and tie.
  16. Episode 8 All the Pretty Sources
  17. Episode 7 The Big Sleep No More
    Gossip Girl Recap: You Know, You May Be an Evil Genius “Without the pressure of me on top of you all the time — so to speak.”
  18. Episode 6 I Am Number Nine
  19. Episode 5 The Fasting and the Furious
  20. Episode 4 Memoirs of an Invisible Dan
    Gossip Girl Recap: Turns Out the Only Thing Ridiculous Is Me Nothing is worse than being omitted from Dan’s book.
  21. Episode 3 The Jewel of Denial
    Gossip Girl Recap: Everyone Goes Off the Rails at Some Point Around Here Welcome back to the land where everything sparkles and everyone has nervous breakdowns.
  22. Episode 2 Beauty and the Feast
  23. Episode 1 Yes, Then Zero
    Gossip Girl Recap: The Zip Codes May Be Different, But the Douchebags Are the Same On last night’s season-five (FIVE) premiere, some things grew and changed and some things stayed the same.
  1. Episode 10 New York, I Love You XOXO
    Gossip Girl Series Finale Recap: I Guess That Means It’s All Over Now Pressler and Rozvar, together one last time to discuss the Greatest Show of Our Time.
  2. Episode 9 The Revengers
    Gossip Girl Recap: Blair Waldorf and Her Bitches On the Upper East Side of Gossip Girl, there are no random acts of kindness.
  3. Episode 8 It’s Really Complicated
    Gossip Girl Recap: This Will Be the Best Thanksgiving Ever Thanksgiving on Gossip Girl is always a disaster, but they keep trying, because what else can they do? 
  4. Episode 7 Save the Last Chance
    Gossip Girl Recap: Since When Did You Start Spiking Your Chamomile? Can one ever really know another person? On Gossip Girl and in life, we have learned that one cannot.
  5. Episode 6 Where the Vile Things Are
    Gossip Girl Recap: Your Dark Side Is Showing Blair tries to behave “more like Grace Kelly, less like Grace Jones.”
  6. Episode 5 Monstrous Ball
    Gossip Girl Recap: He’s an Adult and He Treats Me Like One Let’s be honest: No one is an adult on Gossip Girl.
  7. Episode 3 Dirty Rotten Scandals
    Gossip Girl Recap: Mind, Body, and Scheme Last night’s Gossip Girl opened with a scene we’ve seen many times before.
  8. Episode 2 High Infidelity
    Gossip Girl Recap: This Will Rock the Upper East Side As you probably know from last night’s episode of the Show of Our Time, our recapper appeared as herself.
  9. Episode 1 Gone Maybe Gone
    Gossip Girl Recap: With Age Comes Wisdom And so begins the Last Season of the Show of Our Time.

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  7. (not) coming soon
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  8. here we go again!
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    How The Penguin Became the Sofia Falcone Show Cristin Milioti thought through every motivation, music cue, and mullet option to craft the most sympathetic psychopath on TV.
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    Yellowjackets Wants to Be Your Bloody Valentine Season three will have a double premiere on a romantic date.
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