Super Bowl ad winners: Tebow soft-sell PR campaign and screaming chickens

Hands-down the best Super Bowl commercial was the Tebow mother and son soft-sell, where the advance PR hullabaloo delivered the anti-abortion message, leaving the TV-spot, an advocacy theme flag-planting placed at a celebrated cost of three million dollars, to ice the cake. Only its detractors would find the final 30-second message anticlimactic. The “Tebow Ad” was a month long campaign. Count ABC and the NFL also big winners, whose commercial breaks were watched more closely because of the Tebow hoopla, especially lookouts anticipating a multiple Tebow spot. Sunday’s ads might have been scrutinized more than the game itself. Second place goes to the Denny’s Grand Slam screaming chicken spots, with another ad-world sophistication, piggybacking on the Tebow jitters with a spot that began with lighting a birthday cake, a Tebow feint, interrupted by the now-recurring alarmed chicken.

Focus on the Family’s brilliant move, orchestrated obviously by Madison Avenue talent and choreographed over the range of traditional advertising mediums –PR, editorials, activists– illustrates further what would-be social message advocates are up against when denied ad placement by the networks. Adbusters has sued the US networks for forbidding an anti-consumer spot. Could they have advanced an inoffensive and surrounded it with a meatier media debate? More and more it requires the collusion with the editorial bosses. Each successive Yes Men action has met with an ever tightening controlled response.

Media pundits are calling wins for the usual Budweiser and Dorito ads. Based on TiVo results. Bet you didn’t know those machines were returning the logs of your viewing habits in shorter than 30 second increments…

Ding-Dong, the Wicked Witch is Dead! Well not quite, Dorothy…

Darth VaderDobson resigns as chairman of Focus on the Family. Yes, the cows are mooing and all is happiness in the land of Odd (Colorado Springs, that is)! Dobson is being replaced by another, retired Air Force Lt. Gen. Patrick P. Caruana, who is a longtime board member and a former executive with that merchant of death, Northrup Grumman.

How befitting the Focus On Right Wing Bullshit People to have their Head Witch replaced by a General Warlock! This is sure to impress the world with their claims of being of the Highest Morality, for sure! NOT………

Darth Vader was busy elsewhere, I guess? But at least The Wicked Witch is Dead!

Can I get an inflatable Ted Haggard Sex Doll anywhere?

Ted HaggardA lot of us have literally fallen in love with Ted Haggard, and now that he is immersed in sin he seems even sexier! So that brings me to the question of where can one go to get an inflatable Ted Haggard Sex Doll? Don’t worry, I won’t molest it if I find one, I strictly want him around for a platonic relationship based on Christ.

Now you might think that my desire to have this doll, Ted, is quite sick, but there may be places that will begin to help men like me out? For example, if we enter into Book 22, we might find that obsessive sexual attraction to Ted might still not make oneself incapable of being accepted inside the big tent of Love. The doors are being widened by the Obama Era and that’s a good thing for those being torn apart by their own sinful lusts!

At Book 22, where ‘intimacy products for married couples’ are being sold, I saw no inflatable dolls at all for sell. But inflatable sex dolls are the type of ‘intimacy product’ that do bring levity and joy to married couples daily! It will only be a matter of short time before the arousability factor of these dolls becomes better know to Christians! So why not have one with the likeness of sinful bad boy, Ted Haggard?

Sure, stick with an inflatable Pope doll or Franklin Graham one if you desire, but for me, it’s Ted all the way! I just can’t help it…. since I’m kind of a Christian Nympho and still love God, and some of God’s products still love me. Can I get an inflatable Ted Haggard Sex Doll anywhere?

Twilight- Go see the movie!

twilightAs a reward this week for having to put up with the disgusting job CS School District 11 is doing in supposedly teaching her, I took my daughter out to see the movie she wanted to see, which was Twilight.

She has just finished reading all the 4 Vampire books out in this series and had to go see this movie, and she dragged me to doing it with her because going to see a romance novel movie is normally the last thing I would ever do. I’m glad she pushed me to go, because I thought it was a damn good movie and probably about the best teenage vampire movie that has ever been made!

Now most movie critics have not agreed with my assessment and the reason why is quite simple. They are older farts that want to totally concentrate on the Puritanism of the author, and not on the film itself. Let me just say to them though, that sometimes FUN is the main reason for things, and not merely the political message. As an atheist kid, I thoroughly enjoyed much of CS Lewis’s work, conservative Christian messaging or not, it simply made no difference to me when I was a pre-teen/ young teen reader. One has to see this movie and take it on that raw entertainment level, and not the level of it being a Conservative morality play.

Roger Ebert actually has a fairly intelligent review of the movie out, and recommends a Swedish vampire movie at the end that now I and my daughter will also have to see. So one vampire thing leads to another, and that’s why if you haven’t yet seen the movie, go see it NOW! Vampires are fun, and Focus on the Family needs more vampirism in their family life!

Funny thing about the movie, I liked it but my daughter felt it to be too racy on screen as compared to how it read to her by book. She wanted Edward to restrain his bloodlust (sexual drive) yet more!

Well, you simply cannot please all the people all the time, but all in all, a very well made movie on the Vampire theme. I give it 4 1/2 stars out of 5. Check it out. Ed the Vampire just won’t bite you unless you open up to him willingly! He’s just that good a Vampire! I think that my daughter would rate it about 3 stars out of 5. But she’s Hooked on Books!

The future of socialism and LGBT rights in Cuba

Ted and Gayle HaggardThe future of socialism and LGBT rights in Cuba, an interview with Mariela Castro. I thought this interview might be of some interest to Colorado’s LGBT community, as it shows not quite the monster leadership of Cuba as is usually portrayed by the Right Wing here in NORADlandia when they talk about Human Rights. Ted Haggard might even ought to ask for political asylum in Cuba? Take your whole family, Ted, and at least have a vacation there! Break the law! Psst… I hear you’re changing your views as a Christian… right?

Family Values

child preacherWe now have a New Movement on the go in America today, what with John McCain’s choice of who to have beside him in the presidential race, Sarah Palin. This New Movement is one for Christian Family Values and we predict that it will sweep America like no other movement ever has. So in order to help persuade other heathen like ourselves to lay down our arms and allow these Values to take hold in our hearts, we present America’s Christian Family Values, a Salute to Our Christian Young Evangelists at work and play!

Young Preacher – When Will You Worship

This Christian kid is great, isn’t he? Thank you, John and Sarah for making us focus more on family! And now…

The World’s Youngest Preacher

Man, don’t you love it when the young are taught just so Right? These kids are just so cute!
And not to be outdone by the previous 2 young tele-evangelists, here is…

The World’s Youngest and Smallest Preacher

It’s just great that now liberals and Sarah Palin supporters will all go at each other’s throats, isn’t it? The whole world will be watching and having a ball! Meanwhile, The Young Evangelist Movement will be changing the world to a better place, a more comic one. That is, if you do not cry instead? I love that baby preacher!

Pastor Billy, there are some real nuts and perverts out in Manitou Springs

There is a building out there in Manitou Springs that is full of nuts. The building houses the remnants of Pastor Billy Hargis’s ‘Christian Crusade’ , Hargis being a commie-phobic radio evangelist from Texarkana, who lost his ministry when caught screwing with both man and wife in a married couple whose marriage he had just performed! Talking to each other they both discovered that they had both lost their virginity to Billy! Some ministry it certainly was!

Here is how Manitou based Summit Minstries and their ex-Billy Hargis disciple, Pastor David A. Noebel, was described in PublicEye.org back in 1993.

Summit Ministries
Summit Ministries of Manitou Springs, Colorado, is a little-known Religious Right organization whose work is national in scope. It is a 30-year-old Christian organization specializing in educational materials and summer youth retreats. Its president is Rev. David A. Noebel, formerly a prominent preacher in Rev. Billy James Hargis’s Christian Crusade. As early as 1977, Noebel authored The Homosexual Revolution, in which he claims that “homosexuality rapidly is becoming one of America’s most serious social problems.” He has also written several books claiming that rock’n’roll and soul music are communist plots to corrupt US youth. Summit Ministries later published AIDS: Acquired Immune Deficiency Syndrome: A Special Report, co-authored by David Noebel, Wayne C. Lutton, and Paul Cameron. For the last several years, virtually every issue of The Journal, Summit Ministries’ monthly newsletter, has contained several anti-homosexual entries. Summit Ministries has just published Noebel’s new book, Understanding the Times: The Story of the Biblical Christian, Marxist/Leninist and Secular Humanist Worldviews.

Noebel’s background with Rev. Billy James Hargis’s Christian Crusade helps to explain the historical friendly relationship between Summit Ministries and the John Birch Society (JBS). Both the Christian Crusade and the John Birch Society represent a political sector known in political science literature as the “old right.” Born out of the conviction that communism was rampant in the United States, both organizations believed that the civil rights movement was manipulated by communists, that the National Council of Churches promoted communism, and that the United Nations was controlled by communists. In 1962, Rev. Billy James Hargis purchased an old resort hotel in Manitou Springs, which was renamed The Summit. The Summit became a retreat and anti-communism summer college.

Summit’s relationship with the John Birch Society is deeper than mere ideological affinity. In fact, in 1983, a donor responding to a John Birch Society fundraising letter sent a check to Robert Welch of JBS, and received a thank-you letter from Welch. The check, however, was made out to Summit Ministries.

Rev. David Noebel was a member of the John Birch Society until at least 1987, and for many years Summit Ministries took out full-page advertisements for its summer youth retreats in Review of the News and American Opinion, two John Birch Society publications.

Summit Ministries is also politically close to Dr. James Dobson and Focus on the Family. Dr. Dobson, especially since moving to Colorado, leads seminars at Summit Ministries, and his endorsement of Summit’s work was prominent in Summit’s material promoting its 30th anniversary. David Noebel is on the advisory board of Colorado for Family Values.
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to see the full article go to Constructing Homophobia
Colorado’s Right-Wing Attack on Homosexuals

Also check out Summit Ministries itself. And for more about David A. Noebel and his Billy James Hargis connections see wikipedia.

And for more about how the Rightwing preacher was laid low by sexual scandal see the 2004 obituary for him in The Guardian.

Arizona, our lovely sun state is shocking!

Tired of Tupperware parties, Amway sales parties, lingerie sales parties, Mary Kay cosmetics sales parties, Women? Want to make a fortune and socialize with other ladies of your type at the same time? Great!

From Phoenix, in our lovely sun state of Arizona, a new opportunity for getting rich shockingly quick is emerging. We are talking about pink stun gun sales parties! Taser parties stunning success with female clients

Yes, Arizona seems to be the perfect birthplace for this new social engagement. Pretty soon, moms all across America will be buying these high voltage birth control machines for their teenage daughters to go along with the more basic Biblical Abstinence Education course. Focus on the family!

Now, isn’t this much better than having to carry around pepper spray bottles in your purses, take feminist karate courses taught by imposing lesbians, or just calling 9/11, Ladies? Plus, if you catch the old man or teen boy watching porn on the INTERNET, you can always deliver them a gentle reminder of how you feel about such things. This is a sales item that no home can be without safely. Buy one now! ***note- The Pink Taser will soon be available in Tangerine, Fuchsia, and Nude, too.

Buy your new sex toy HERE! And just wait to our ‘peace officers’ got a shot of this! Bondage and domination has never been easier and more convenient!

Where are you from?

AFAIn college, when asked where I was from, I would proclaim, “I’m from Colorado Springs!” Eyes would light up in recognition. “Isn’t that…?” “Yes,” I would nod. Nestled at the foot of Pikes Peak. The inspiration for America the Beautiful. Home to Garden of the Gods, the Air Force Academy, NORAD, the Olympic Training Center. I could proudly claim them all.

My how times have changed. Still happy to reside in Colorado, I do not readily admit that I live in Colorado Springs. When my secret is uncovered, eyes narrow with suspicion. “Isn’t that…?” “Yes,” I say as my shoulders sag. Focus on the Family, New Life Church, Ted Haggard, Raytheon, General Dynamics, Lockheed Martin.

My home town, my slice of purple mountain majesty, has become ground zero for war profiteers and religious zealots.

Although we don’t know many of them by name, they have a profound impact on our community. They shape local politics. They vote down cultural and environmental initiatives, and deny tax support for helping organizations. They control school boards and change school curricula. They chase away our artists and our young idealists. They drive our gay population back into the closet. And they profit from the spilled blood of our children.

They and their ilk put George W. Bush in the White House. They continue to support our country’s assaults on sovereign nations in order to advance their narrow ideologies and line their gaping pockets. The shame I feel when people discover that I am from Colorado Springs is the same shame felt by many Americans traveling abroad. “We are from the United States,” they mumble. Ground zero for war profiteers and religious zealots….

WWDLD?

Colorado Senator Doug LambornPer the Denver Post, the following are two voice messages that Rep. Doug Lamborn left on the home telephone of Jonathan and Anna Bartha after they wrote a letter to the Woodmen Edition criticizing Lamborn for accepting $1500 from gambling interests.
 
FIRST MESSAGE: “Hello, this is Doug Lamborn calling for either Jonathan or Anna. Something very serious has happened. There was a letter to the editor that you both put in your names to the editor of the Woodmen Edition and there is something that is blatantly false in that letter…

“I would like to get together with you and show this to you and appeal to you as a brother and sister in Christ. You didn’t give me that opportunity but I am happy to overlook that and deal with you on that level because I think that is the right thing to do and show you where you made a blatant, wrong statement.

“Now there are consequences to this kind of thing, but I would like to work with you in a way that is best for everyone here concerned. So please call me at your earliest convenience. It is now 2:40 (p.m.) on Saturday afternoon.

SECOND MESSAGE: “Hello, this is Doug Lamborn again, I’m finishing up my message from a moment ago. I got cut off. It is critical that you get back to me as soon as possible on this because I’ll be going back to Washington here in a few days and I have to make sure that this is resolved one way or another. And like I said I’d rather resolve this on a Scriptural level but if you are unwilling to do that I will be forced to take other steps, which I would rather not have to do. So please call me. This is essential. Call me by tonight, Saturday night and we can get together sometime Sunday afternoon.”

Oh my. Consequences. What consequences? Well, Anna Bartha worked on the campaign for Jeff Crank, an opponent of Lamborn’s in the Republican primary race. And Jonathan Bartha works for Focus on the Family. Maybe Lamborn is threatening to call in a favor from Dobson? This wouldn’t be retribution would it? I mean, what would Jesus do?

The Post reported that when asked whether his messages were threatening, Lamborn said: “No, that is ridiculous. My hope, I failed, but I had hoped to meet with them privately and confidentially because lying is a serious matter. ”

Asked what he meant by consequences, Lamborn said: “When someone tells a lie, it just has bad consequences.”

Lamborn claims that he did in fact receive the contribution but returned it. Federal records show he received the money, but not that he returned it. So let’s hope that the very serious sin of bearing false witness does indeed have consequences. I hope we can get this Nazi bastard out of office sooner rather than later.

Props to the right wing Barthas for busting his chops! The blind beating the blind. We likey!

Bush and Dobson at Bomb ’em Summit (and other things)

James Dobson met with Bush in a ‘pro-family movement’ summit and came to the startling conclusion that it was OK for Iranian families to drop bombs on them to save them from their president who Dobson compares to Hitler. Did you have problems following that logic?

Actually, James Dobson did not say that it was OK for Iranian families to drop bombs on Iran, but only that it was ‘pro-family’ for American families for the US government to do so. Ok, look it’s hard to link bombs with being ‘pro-family’, so you might want to call ‘Focus on the Family’ to get them to explain it all to you. I can’t. Certainly not that well, at any rate….

We live in amazing times and the American family has changed it seems. Iranian children must be nuked if they misbehave, and George is just the perfect big daddy to do it, too. And Poppy Dick from his aircraft carrier out there in the Persian Gulf is going to help out, too.

American children here in Colorado Springs on the other hand, have a much more permissive big daddy who goes by by the name of Richard ‘Liars’ Myers. Being a good liberal sort of guy, he will ensure that all Colorado Springs children will just get time outs instead of new generation ‘bunker buster’ nukes on their butts. And Father Lionel will protect all of us local kids without regard to whether or not we are ‘defense’ contractors.

It’s a privilege to live in Colorado and have such nice military-industrial-psychological complex working to keep us safe and sane. Thanks, All!