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I genuinely counted 25 people go to the toilet in this two hour showing in a 40-seat screen (one guy three times!). Must be the slow Eggers style and the archaic storyline 🙄 that had East Londoners emptying their bladders. I love a fairytale, but what a way to say virgin youth is prized and women’s desires are hysterical and never to be sated by poor old earthbound husband. So much sin. Let the lady rave 💀
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Name one blonde boy you trust after this…
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It was round about the saucer of milk that it started to feel autobiographical
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The accents and the dialogue 💀 why does the baby sound like
Gollum ? The way Alice Lowe walks with her feet splayed out looking completely non-threatening and kind of mad.
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Slow, which I found to be a strength. Slightly forgettable.
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I’d normally order the octopus
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Can I just say on everyone’s behalf, that we don’t need a Black Phone 2
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Slightly confused, like maybe AI got involved in the screenplay. The bot even got in a ‘man references Radiohead to girl’ meme to which I said “Oh my God” out loud in the cinema - blasphemous
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The French cuisine is the real horrorshow of this film.
Favourite moment was when Elisabeth fixed up a date with Fred and smiled like she knew she was loved and worth it ☠️
Least favourite moment - I hate Sue. And the male gaze in this. And the whole movie. It is so utterly stupid.
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Screened at Deptford library for Halloween / Black History Month.
Life goal is to meet someone called Mamuwalde IRL.
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I’m sorry for anyone who didn’t like it, the man is seriously seriously mentally unwell, and that’s not entertainment. Bringing back the involuntarily into the incel.
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This was more watchable than I expected, given I couldn’t donate the book to charity quick enough.
I’ve got the flu so came to Greenwich to an empty showing to take advantage of air con and darkness. But then Ryle gave me the sicky ick from the start.
Since it didn’t achieve nuance or subtlety anyway (note how they shovelled that ‘it ends with us’ speech in messily), the film could’ve done a public service and had Lily go to…
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