Con Air

Con Air

A pure and uncomplicated popcorn action flick. The vehicle stunts are rad and the premise is really good, but that's really it. It's not something like a John Wick or The Matrix where the composition of the action itself is worth writing home about.

What's worth writing home about is the absolute hall of fame dudes rock lineup that propels this movie to cult classic status.

Nic Cage does a so-bad-it-works Alabama accent, John Cusack wears birkenstocks for the whole plot of an action movie, John Malkovich absolutely goes for it as the extremely quotable and excellently named Cyrus the Virus, Dave Chappelle is at the height of his stand-up powers and basically just improvs his whole part, Steve Buscemi plays the character he would have played if he'd ever been in Mindhunter. Danny Trejo shows up as a creepy rapist but also with no facial hair (both of these things are bad and upsetting). If that weren't enough, Ving Rhames does a tremendous turn, Star Trek TNG's Chief O'Brien (Colm Meaney) plays a douchebag fed, and Major Briggs from Twin Peaks makes a cameo!

It's total 90s cheese, the plot has been shot full of holes with a shotgun and they arguably could have done more with this premise before defaulting to samey gun battles but Con Air still fucks. The right dudes rocking hard enough can make anything a classic.

I rate this movie four bunnies out of five boxes.

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