• Bottoms

    Bottoms

    ★★★★½

    We have our Jane Fonda and Lilly Tomlin.

  • Olaf's Frozen Adventure

    Olaf's Frozen Adventure

    ★½

    Disney said "you're not getting out of one of our movies without seeing a few white people first"

  • The Binge

    The Binge

    This is Booksmart for people who couldn’t pass the SAT.

  • Gretel & Hansel

    Gretel & Hansel

    ★½

    This is like if A24 produced a CW pilot.

  • Hasan Minhaj: The King's Jester

    Hasan Minhaj: The King's Jester

    ★★★½

    This happened to my buddy Brother Eric.

  • Stutz

    Stutz

    This review may contain spoilers. I can handle the truth.

    Stutz is a cruel display of an unethical power dynamic peddled as a respectful tribute to a vital medical process. Jonah Hill disguises his film as a story about a patient wanting to learn more about his doctor. That lasts about thirty minutes before he shatters that illusion and reveals his actual intention, to fix his therapist. 

    For a film that’s supposed to be a love letter to therapy, it egregiously violates the social contract of the profession. Stutz more…

  • All of Us Strangers

    All of Us Strangers

    ★★★½

    The “my parents are my best friends” crowd is going to go feral for this thing.

  • Lamb

    Lamb

    ½

    I want to take this movie behind a barn and blow its fucking pebble brains out. Then I’ll shoot it again to make sure it stops twitching and gasping out yet another scene where they stand around the farm while a smoke machine runs in the background. Nobody should be willingly or accidentally exposed to something this astoundingly pretentious and painfully dull.

    Lamb is the terrible short film that your insufferable friend of a friend makes you watch at a…

  • The Medallion

    The Medallion

    ★★

    This shit is terrible but when I was a seven years old it might as well have been John Wick.

  • Asteroid City

    Asteroid City

    I wish I was at Cannes so I could’ve booed.

    There’s nothing to say about this hack anymore. It’s the same shtick every time, progressively getting less clever but more self congratulatory. The second I realized that this wasn’t going to be a cute alien movie and instead an overlong meta diatribe about Mr John Pierre Stevenson Knickerbocker The Third’s playwriting career I knew it was over. 

    No good performances from a cast of legendary character actors. Any laughs are…

  • On the Count of Three

    On the Count of Three

    ★★★★★

    Depicting male mental health is a funny thing. It often feels like there is no correct answer. Express our toxic lapses in judgment too causally, and you risk diminishing the fact that most of them stem from terror and pain. On the flip side, lean too deeply into them, and you risk influencing the more gullible among us who tend to purposefully misinterpret morality tales and act on those interpretations. No matter how you slice it, it is a topic…

  • Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

    Fantastic Beasts: The Crimes of Grindelwald

    This movie didn't enter the fantasy genre until you expected me to believe that Jude Law would settle for Johnny Depp.

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