Directed by John Paul Fedele
The luxury liner Titanic 2000 has set sail on its maiden voyage, and one of the passengers is the vampire Vladamina. Vladamina is searching for a woman she can turn into a vampire queen, and frustrated rock groupie Shari looks to be a perfect target. As various people get seduced and/or killed as the liner continues on its doomed voyage, Shari must chose between eternity as a living dead sex slave or a frigid grave at the bottom of the ocean.
Scary Sexy Disaster Movie, Vampire of the Titanic, 恐怖性爱灾难片
USAR USA 
you're my chosen one- we can be happy for an eternity
🩸❣️🩸❣️🩸❣️🩸❣️🩸❣️🩸❣️🩸
came for tina krause, stayed for
- tina with pigtails
- tina modeling different sets of lingerie in the mirror
- tina's striptease
- tina in leopard print
- tina's signature lil confused pouty-face (she's so cute)
- tina posing nude to be painted
- tina punching a dude (helll yeh)
- tina turning into a vampire & living happily ever after with her "scrumptious lesbian vampire" vladamina <3
but suffered thru the
- bad dialogue
- corny CGI
- silly green screens
- jokes that didn't land a single time for me
- fart noises / other ridiculous sound effects
- annoying male characters who wouldn't stop talking
!!UGH!!…
🎃 31 Days of Halloween || Movie 10 🎃
aka TITanic Double-D* and Scary Sexy Disaster Movie
Sure, Titanic 2000 might be less of a monumental cinematic achievement than the James Cameron movie, but at least it has a fake-breasted vampire babe getting into all kinds of lesbian trouble. That makes it a winner in my book..
When will I find my queen? When will I find the one who is strong enough to accept my eternal gift?
This is less softcore trash, and more absurdist comedy (trash). It's basically just a series of comedic skits. It never made me laugh out loud, but I did watch the whole thing with a smile on my face, so I guess that's…
I've been thinking about my attraction to 90's/00's softcore and it really all boils down to my childhood and the provocative clothing I observed. BOLD colors, colors men want to see on a woman's body. Usually black and red. A touch of animal print. So predictable and yet almost "classic".
I've always had an obsession with stripper clothes. When I was little my Mom used to get the Fredrick's of Hollywood catalog in the mail. Looking through it was such a thrill. Midnight blue lace and black catsuits made the models look like super heroines. Someone to be worshiped? We didn't have a Fredrick's store in my hometown, our substitute was "Condom Knowledge", your one stop shop for crotchless panties,…
firstly let’s not mention the site i had to use to watch this and secondly wtf am i doing with my life. the porn ads really elevated the experience and if my tv gets a virus from this.. oh well i had fun?? rip TITanic 🫡
This was watched as part of the Summer of Trash Challenge
Just knowing someone out there in the world saw Titanic and thought to themselves that movie needed topless lesbian vampires will let me sleep well tonight.
If being a vampire really means having no more hangovers, no more bad hair days, and no more "asshole rockstar boyfriends", please sign me up immediately!
I wouldn't necessarily call this good, but compared to the last turd I watched, it was at least watchable and occasionally funny. I mean, the ship is pronounced TIT-anic, what is better than that?!
i guess there was a period of time where if you wanted to make a zucker bros style parody of a movie (for example, titanic), you had to write in a softcore subplot to get funding. scary movie eventually put an end to that
The title I watched this under was TITanic Double-D. Sigh. I watched this in something of a broken state. Mouth agape, eyes unfocused, brain in hibernation. This is bafflingly pointless, filled with jokes too dumb for a thirteen-year-old lad, Americans doing horrible British accents, bowling alley level CGI, and constant giant fake tits. It's awful. So awful. But it is so clearly taking the piss and having a laugh that it's hard not to respect its obnoxious audacity. Also, the cast is spattered with familiar straight-to-video faces from the always amazing Tina Krause to a band made up of Bill Hellfire, Joey Smack, and Misty Mundae. I hated watching this and I'm glad I watched it.
girl: "I could use a stiff one"
Dork in glasses: "Certainly! But first have a drink!"
Also known as "Scary Sexy Disaster Movie".
John Paul Fedele's "TITanic 2000: Vampire of the Titanic" delivers plenty of T&A (and more than a few extra glimpses) with the always striking Tina Krause as the main draw in that department. What I didn’t expect was a Titanic spoof with actual wit, sharp dialogue, and cartoonish performances you’d never anticipate in a film like this.
Much of it is shot against green screens with a crude CG ship model straight out of a 3D storyboard program. Instead of sinking the movie, it all adds to the goofy comic charm.
The story follows a lesbian vampire…
Schiffbruch zusammen mit Glimmerman und Film_Sammlung.
Wenn man für einige Passagen nicht mal mehr Greenscreen hinbekommt und man zum Blackscreen greifen muss, sprich einfach schwarze Hintergründe, steckt man tief im Rotz! Wobei das auch Vorteile hat, denn die Greenscreen Einlagen und «Effekte» sehen aus wie auf einem Pentium 386er anno 1994 gerendert.
Ganz so scheisse wie meine Kollegen fand ich TITanic 2000 ja nicht. Da wurde ich letzte Woche schlechter unterhalten. Natürlich ändert das nichts daran, dass wir hier absoluten Schrott gesehen haben.
Die Softsex Girl-on-Girl Einlagen gehen in Ordnung. Wie eigentlich alles mit der holden Tina Krause. Bei diesen wenigen Szenen kam so was wie Spass auf. Ganz kurz natürlich.
Der Rest ist schwer für’n Eimer. Schauspieler sind nix,…
all aboard the horny lesbian vampire TITanic where all the jokes are no-brow slapstick and every scene is shot with zero effort chroma keying (making this feel like a brain melting 90-minute hetero drag race skit)
& of course they spoof the "draw me like one of your french girls" scene to expected results
Titanic 2000 barely lives up to expectations of being a silly romp. It drags with a couple of chuckles scattered throughout until the final stretch, which is a bit funnier...maybe as a reflection of Cameron's version now that I think about it.
