Re: Every office has one.
Countables and countables most definitely do exist and are in no way 'elitist'. You and I both use them every day usually without being aware of their usage.
At least, I wasn't aware until, in order to teach English in Germany, I read from cover to cover an extremely sound book by Raymond Murphy. (IMV the English teacher's bible. (Note without a capital letter.))
Simple example: you can use 'a/an' before countables but not (usually) before uncountables. e.g. 'I want an apple' (banana, orange, walnut), but not 'I want a milk' or a rice or a water.
A glass of milk, a bowl of rice, etc.
Unusually, "I'd like a beer." "Pint or half?"
Much too long to to transfer the contetnts here, but may I refer you to the 'English Grammar in Use" 3rd edition (first published in 2004) Units 69 to 71, where all is made clear.
An example I was frequently asked about in Deutschland was the use of the Englsih word 'billion'.
Common usage gives it as 10^9, but I was taught that it means a million millions or 10^12, my dictionary agrees with me.
In Germany a thousand million translates to Milliarde but Millionen is a million millions.
Hence confusion.
My answer was therefore "it depends who you're talking to!"
Biting the hand that feeds IT
