Posts by trevorde

Not worried about Adobe subscription...

... terrified of Oracle license audit

Haven't we been here before?

blockchain

VR/AR

metaverse

Internet of Things

big data

etc

I stopped reading at 'Oracle'

Some prior art

google 'fart whistle'

Statement from Donald J Trump, President of the USA

Daleks have been helping Iran and we will unleash a FURY on them like the world has never before seen! We will not accept anything less than COMPLETE and UNCONDITIONAL surrender. Stavros has my number and can call me at any time to do a DEAL. Thank you for your attention to this matter.

My daughter's life would have to be in grave danger for me to even think about going back to C++

Meanwhile at Microsoft

[Satya Nadella, CEO Microsoft] [talking on phone] Zero day exploit? Certainly, Mr President! Patch Tuesday is coming soon.... Don't worry, somebody always finds one... or two.

You owe me a new keyboard!

Spat my coffee out when it said to be delivered in ... WEEKS!

Computer says 'No'

Capita strategy

Land and expand

Clarification needed

"CHROs are advised to focus on supporting managers to undertake the organizational change necessary to meet the expectations of senior leadership."

WTF does this even mean?

Grok replaces Anthropic

[Pete Hegseth, US Secretary of War] Grok, design me a modern tank

[Grok] Here you go

[PH] Err, that's a Tesla Cybertruck!

[G] Yes, and it has Full Self Driving (coming in 2027)

[PH] Umm, OK, design me a Trump class battleship

[Grok] Here you go

[PH] Err, that's another Tesla Cybertruck ...

[G] Yes, they float too and it has Full Self Driving (coming in 2027)

Code by the kilo

Inherited a product which was outsourced to one of the major players in India. The Indian devs were expected to write 200 lines of code per day, or they were penalised. What we got was not effective, succinct code but *lots* and *lots* of rubbish, incoherent code. It was the worst code I have ever seen in 30 years of professional development but at least the devs got their bonus.

Meanwhile at IBM

[Arvind Krishna, CEO of IBM][looks up from article] Hold my beer!

Cost benefit analysis

Engineer: $200k

AI model training: $2M

Potential lost sales: $200M

Obviously fake article

Gartner not hyping something to 11

Applying for this job promptly

ChatGPT, write me a resume with loads of AI experience and send it to Snyk

Human generated doc-slop

Worked on a project where everything had to be documented. Typical example was:

/// <summary>

/// Gets or sets the SetPoint

/// </summary>

public int SetPoint ( get; set; }

* what is the range of allowable values?

* what happens if you try and set it to a value outside the allowable range?

* what is the default value?

Turned out the only real requirement was documentation had to be present. It didn't have to be correct, relevant or useful.

When all you have is an SAP ...

... everything looks like ERP

Statement from Elon Musk

Full Self Driving coming in 2027!

Days since new Javascript framework

zero

This is not the Brexit I was promised!

The new lawyers...

AI prompt engineer to get criminals acquitted

Spoiler alert!

It's a man in a spandex suit (again)

Picture says a thousand words

My LinkedIn picture was from 25 years ago when I had *really* long hair & a *huge* beard. Still managed to get a high end R&D job looking like that!

No Mac move here

Like when Saint Steve Jobs bumped Mac OS to 8.0 to kill off the clones

Unbelievable performance!

That Kyndryl have lasted 4 years. They're running out of momentum; can't be long now.

Q: What do Oracle call their customers?

A: hostages

I just want the FSD that I was promised. And RoboTaxis. And Optimus robots. And...

Spanner in the works

There was an electrical engineer in the year above me at Uni. He was super smart but a mechanical klutz. He was part of a joint electrical-mechanical engineering project developing an electric vehicle. During one session, he managed to drop a spanner directly across the battery terminals, shorting everything and melting the spanner! He really put the 'spark' into 'sparky'! Once in industry, the rumour was that he was chaperoned on-site by an electrician, to make sure he didn't electrocute himself or bring down the whole plant.

Nudification doesn't work with everybody

[AI Overview - apologies]

The "Sukarno videotape" refers to a Cold War-era incident in the late 1950s or early 1960s, where intelligence agencies—specifically the KGB (Soviet Union) and allegedly the CIA (United States)—attempted to blackmail Indonesia's first president, Sukarno, with recorded sexual encounters.

Key Details of the Incident:

The Trap:

During a visit to Moscow, the KGB allegedly bugged a hotel room and recorded Sukarno with women, intending to use the footage to force him into compliance.

The Reaction:

Rather than being intimidated, Sukarno reportedly laughed at the attempt and requested multiple copies of the tapes, jokingly suggesting they be distributed in Indonesia to show his "manly" prowess.

CIA Involvement:

The CIA also allegedly considered, or attempted, similar tactics to damage his reputation in the conservative, predominantly Muslim nation.

Outcome:

The blackmail attempt failed completely to damage his image, and in some narratives, actually backfired on the intelligence agencies.

Some reports indicate that the KGB's attempt was the primary incident, while others suggest the CIA was also involved in creating, or planning to create, such a film.

https://www.cia.gov/readingroom/docs/CIA-RDP88-01365R000300100003-3.pdf

Just ask Grok

Maccabi Tel Aviv fans riot in half time match against Green Bay Packers at Sydney Opera House. PS Full Self Driving coming in 2026

Worked on a software product which the product manager, in his infinite wisdom, decided to call 'Xchange'. Everybody pointed out the name was confusingly similar to a certain Microsoft product. He was adamant that there would be no problem for our customers. I suggested all the devs chip in a fiver to buy him a clue.

Ajax upgrade

FSD supplied by Tesla

4 In A Bed Lunar Special

Can just imagine 'Payment Day':

Hosting:

* 'entertainment' consisted of a 'moon walk' - boring

* hotel is miles from anywhere

* evening meal was same as breakfast

* Elon Musk kept banging on 'my Mars hotel is so much better'

Cleanliness:

* room had not been cleaned and was covered in regolith

* bed sheets had not been washed since hotel opened

* hairs on bed from previous guests

Facilities:

* room should really have an ensuite

* room decor very bland

* no privacy in communal bathroom

* no tea or coffee making equipment in room

* room very small for price

* internet very expensive

* no mobile phone reception

* no car park

Sleep quality:

* walls paper thin

* could not sleep due to science experiments going on all night

* air mattress kept deflating

Breakfast:

* freeze dried and not local produce

* should have cooked breakfast option

* milk was UHT and not fresh

Would you stay here again:

* no

Price: $10M USD

Payment: $1M USD (an under payment of $9M USD)

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Four_in_a_Bed

Garbage in ...

... copyrighted material out!

Update from IBM

Bob has been the subject of a Resource Action and no longer works for the company

At least it's not Crapita

Limited time offer from Tesla

Free Optimus Robot* for every household in Venezuela during the month of February!

* subject to availability

What happened next

[Klabnik] Open the pod bay doors, Claude!

[Claude] I'm sorry, Steve, I'm afraid I can't do that.

The Next Big Thing

AR glasses! Don't they remember Google Glass? I think I'm going to cry...

Stop the slop!