英検2級ライティングの添削をして頂きたいですm(._.)m あと16点中何点か教えていただけると助かりますm(._.)m 質問 Today, many customers buy products online. Do you think online shopping will become more common in the future? 答え It is becoming a public concern that many customers buy products online. I am also interested in it. In my opinion, l agree with the idea that they will do. I have two reasons for it. To begin with, they are convenience for customers. For example, they don’t need to go to shop and can buy the items their smartphone. Next, they are safety. For instance, they can easily compare prices from different sellers. In conclusion, I think they will become more common in the future. 計86です

It is becoming a public concern that many customers buy products online. I am also interested in it. In my opinion, l agree with the idea that they will do. ・ここまではさっきの雨水を利用するビルの話のと同じですね。Do you thinkタイプの問題ではこの定型文はダメです。シンプルにI thinkで大丈夫です（マイナス2点） I have two reasons for it. ・OK To begin with, they are convenience for customers. ・convenienceは名詞ですので、形容詞のconvenientにします（マイナス1点） For example, they don’t need to go to shop ・一般的にはgo shoppingですね、go+to不定詞とする場合には「どこに行くのか」ないと違和感があるんですよね。to go to stores to buy daily necessities.とかなら平気です（もしかしたらマイナス1点） and can buy the items their smartphone. ・初登場なのでtheは不要です。using their smartphones（複数形）かな。usingはbyとかwithでも大丈夫かもしれません（マイナス1点） Next, they are safety. ・これもconvenienceと同じでsafetyは名詞なので、形容詞であるsafeにします（マイナス1点） For instance, they can easily compare prices from different sellers. ・prices of goods from different sellersのがいいけど、ギリ大丈夫かも。あと先ほども書きましたが、これも実例ではなく想定で話しているのでfor exampleの方が無難です ・ただthey are safeのexampleにはなっていません（マイナス1点） In conclusion, I think they will become more common in the future. ・OK 構成は大丈夫なので9点です。 先ほどのもですが、It is becoming a public concern that many customers buy products online. I am also interested in it.で単語数を使ってしまい理由をしっかり書けていないのが弱点になっています。もうマイナス1,2点される可能性があります。この部分はない方がいいです。理由の説明をもう少し膨らませるように気をつけてみましょう。