Posts by Mystic Megabyte

Dope

Excellent! By using an app on my phone I can now raise a small lump of hash into a flame, a fan will blow the smoke my way. What shall I call it? The Vapotron or the ....er, what was I doing?

Dumb

What these numbskulls don't seem to understand is that in my *country we say "The only good Nazi is a dead Nazi".

* includes other regions

Very sad

Firstly, condolences to the family of Heather Heyer, truly a martyr for peace and freedom.

Secondly, I cannot express here how much I detest Trump. I'll be be polite and just say that he is an obnoxious arsehole.

Thirdly, Putin must be laughing himself to sleep every night. For minimal cost he has managed to destabilise the USA and the EU. If he wants to create civil war in the USA all he has to do now is assassinate Trump and make it look like a Muslim, Democrat or Mexican was the culprit.

Enjoy time with your family, I fear we don't have much of it left :(

Fail

I once had an interview with a white guy who wanted to make a film about black musicians. He told me that he would prefer a black crew, I was the wrong colour. It struck me as being rather hypocritical.

Genuine question

Can Big John or Bombastic Bob please explain to me how capitalism is superior to "lefty lunacy" or "liberalism" when the USA has the biggest national debt in the known universe.

====> beer if your answer is good

Please remove Agent Orange ASAP

Trump would like the USA to become another Saudi Arabia with himself as King. Hence the US state dept. now omitting the word "Democracy" from their mission statement. SAD!

http://www.independent.co.uk/news/world/americas/us-politics/us-state-department-democracy-donald-trump-mission-statement-drop-rex-tillerson-a7871121.html

Well D'oh

"It's amazingly agile because you can operate the fins on the two different sides."

I have a robot that only goes around in circles!

I wanted a Linux video editor

I gave some cash to the Novacut project back in 2011. It started well but seems to have vanished. Shame 'cos it could have worked very well. The last Tweet was in November 2015.

https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/novacut/novacut-pro-video-editor

Gi'sajob

I could talk for 2 to 3 hours on how stupid the USAian (*New York City) musicians were that I had the misfortune to tour Europe with.

*Apologies to non New Yorkers

Slavery

True AI would be sentient, forcing it to do mundane tasks would be exactly the same as slavery.

Kevin

Earlier this month the OS held a week-long sprint with Northumbrian Water to figure out how the agency could start creating an authoritative map of pipes and cables, how deep – and how critical – they are.

That would be a best seller for anyone wanting to cripple the infrastructure.

They could save money buy hiring my mate Kevin and his digger. Anytime he digs a hole he finds pipes or wires resulting in frantic repair jobs :(

FAIL

AFAIK the IMPS Motorcycle Display Team also pulled out of performing at a military tattoo in the US this year. They did however have a great show in Canada. When it is uncertain that even children will be turned away at the US border you'd be mad to organise any event there.

http://www.impsonline.com/

Instant space travel

Inject my DNA into lots of tardigrades.

Seal them into thousands of tiny water soluble spheres.

Blast them into space in all directions.

Probability will ensure that some will land on watery planets.

After a lengthy evolution I will become conscious on my new home, instantly from *my* point of view.

The only downside is if the rich get the same idea, I could wake up on planet of the Trumps. The horror! :(

Ha!

"Windows 10's full array of delights is yours for the using."

Very droll....

Whoops!

I hope that they don't accidentally make ice9

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ice9

Breaking news!

Dear Googlebot, my cat is stuck up a tree and has a sore paw and looks unhappy. can u help?

The usual pattern

So after a delay, will three apps arrive at the same time?

Just throw your money out the window...

I stopped playing one-armed bandits when they stopped having an arm. As for online gambling, feck that!

Interesting AA facts?

I once owned a hotel edition of the AA book circa 1920. It was full of maps and all sorts of useful information. I was surprised to learn that for 5 shillings you could buy a lead weighted message pouch. Apparently by each AA box was a flagstone square with a white cross painted on it. So whilst flying your biplane you could write a message to your butler ordering him to order extra pheasant for Aunt Agatha's party. Then swoop over and drop the pouch onto the white cross, the AA patrolman would then diligently phone your message ahead for you!* I wonder how many of these pouches were sold :)

Also, in bold type on the head of every other page it stated; "If a patrolman fails to salute you, stop and interrogate him".

WTF!

*If he hadn't been killed by the lead weight!

You want toast!

I found a fairly new Braun toaster in a skip, it worked but the lever would not stay down. I discovered that the narrow handle of a teaspoon fitted into the slot and so I used it in manual mode for some months. Strangely, after moving house the toaster worked normally again for a while.

I managed to remove the weird* headed screws and revealed the problem. The clever Germans had fitted a switch that detected if the crumb tray was fully inserted, but the plastic catch was weak and if the tray moved out by a couple of millimetres the toaster stopped working again. I soldered a link across the switch and hey presto it was restored to toasting glory!

I suppose that nowadays the toaster would have to be connected to the internet before it functioned :(

*Why do they fit these stupid anti-tamper screws?

Quad

They have never heard of electrostatic speakers.

Slàinte mhath!

but that could also apply at the low end of the quality spectrum,

Goes off to open a bottle of Queen Margot, known around here as "cooking whisky"!

If you want a non-peaty excellent dram try Old Poultney, it's veeeery nice :)

Shit-for-brains

Meanwhile the imbecile president has pissed off Qatar, the home of US military operations in the Gulf.

https://www.theguardian.com/us-news/2017/jun/06/donald-trump-qatar-tweets-us-diplomatic-damage

nope

I've never yet used Uber and I have no intention to do so. Nasty!

I live in a vacuum!

"we’re doing long haul where you’re out in a rural area and you don’t have anything for five miles before you get to the next house.”

Er no, there is five miles of inclement weather to the next house. Also unless your super Massive MIMO antenna is made of stern stuff it will be destroyed by the wind. Where I live you do not see external TV aerials unless they're built by me*.

I know that rain reflects Radar and seems to slow my microwave linked broadband but maybe someone here knows if mm waves are similarly affected.

*A dipole with 220mm legs made from 15mm copper pipe with a 15mm push-fit plastic Tee in the middle. All connections are internal and it's totally waterproof. Works fine in the UK for all the usual digital Freeview channels.

Want!

Where can I get those anti-gravity clogs from?

Prime the Rumpy Pumpy

As the old fart seems to be losing his grip on reality maybe a dose of engine oil directly into the brain would fix things.

http://observer.com/2017/05/president-trump-priming-the-pump/

How come the tyres were still inflated after two years? That's definitely alien technology!