When it comes to a wedding, gift giving plays a big part if you’re a guest. There’s a registry to shop, the decision of how much to spend, when to actually order the gift, and several other topics for discussion. If you’ve ever been (or are currently!) in this situation and have had some questions about it, we’re here to help! Read on for some of our top tips when it comes to wedding gift giving etiquette.
How Much is Appropriate to Spend on a Wedding Gift?
The answer to this one can be tough because it truly depends on how well you know the couple. For a simplified rule of thumb, plan to spend at least $50 per person that you’re bringing to the wedding. That means if you’re bringing your plus one it’s $100 and if you’re bringing your 2 kids and your spouse it’s $200. With that said, if you’re closer to the bride and groom or are in the bridal party, you’ll want to take that into account when thinking about how much to spend. If you’re budgeting to spend a lot of money to either attend or be in the wedding, keep in mind the next scenario.
When Should I Buy a Gift?
The nice thing about a wedding is that you have plenty of time to prepare! That means if you need to save some extra money, you can space it out over several months, even after the wedding is over. As a general rule, however, try and send a gift no later than 3 months after the wedding. Although some people will say up to a year is ok, these days that mindset isn’t widely accepted.
Pro tip: Before you send the gift, make sure you’re sending it to the right place! If the newlyweds are moving post-wedding, make sure to send it to their new address a few weeks later so they don’t have to worry about moving your gift too.
Do I Bring a Gift to the Wedding?
You’ll see that the previous section spoke a lot about sending a gift, and there’s a reason for that! With online registries and most retailers offering free shipping, there’s really no advantage to you or the newlyweds with bringing a gift to the wedding. The only exception is if you’re bringing cash or check as a gift, in which case you can tuck it away in an envelope as most weddings will have a box or basket for cards.
Is it Okay to Give Cash?
Again, we previously mentioned a cash or check gift for a reason. These days many couples are choosing to live together before marriage, making the traditional registry gifts almost completely unnecessary. There’s no couple that wouldn’t appreciate some extra cash money or a contribution to their honeymoon fund, so, by all means, look to that option if it’s available to you.
Pro tip: Some folks of older generations find this concept tacky, so keep that in mind when giving or requesting gifts.
Can I Give Something That Isn’t on the Registry?
You might be inclined to buy a gift that isn’t on the registry for a variety of reasons. Perhaps the registry doesn’t have anything in your budget, you waited too long and there aren’t any options left, or you don’t see something that you’d actually want to gift the happy couple. Fear not! While it is ideal to purchase a gift that the couple registered for, if you can’t make that happen it’s not the end of the world. Think about the couple and try to come up with something that they would truly enjoy, but might not have requested on a registry, and you should be good to go.
Pro tip: Try and pick something that isn’t too large or something they can’t return easily, in case they don’t end up wanting to keep it. At the end of the day you want to give them something they can use easily and happily, and a brand new custom bike in a small urban apartment might not be that thing. Here are some more of our gift suggestions that you might not find on a wedding registry!
A wedding is no doubt a joyous occasion, but the process of selecting and purchasing a gift for the couple can leave some people confused. If you find yourself in that situation, take a look at these common wedding gift giving etiquette questions and hopefully you will have some clarity. Do you have any other gift-giving tips to share? Write them in the comments below!
Erika focuses on email marketing, copywriting and merchandising at Zazzle, but she has a secret obsession with all things wedding! During the week you can find her writing punny subject lines while also pinning the latest wedding trends, and outside of the 9-5, she is usually cheering on the San Jose Sharks, reading a good murder mystery, or hunting for the best Philly Cheesesteak in the Bay Area.
