The Real Housewives of Salt Lake City Recap: Always Trust a Brow Lady

Our ladies are on their first group trip of the season to the beautiful city of Milwaukee. This is not me knocking Milwaukee or a value judgment, but I do love it when Housewives go somewhere that isn’t a luxurious getaway. It means they cannot shield themselves from each other through designer shopping and massages. They’re currently trying to get their groove with one another back … but are still going into this trip with grievances.

Meredith did try and threaten to skip this trip, but obviously, she folded. Bronwyn is pissed at Lisa, who didn’t back her up enough during the Heather argument, and Lisa is still upset with Angie for telling Whitney that Lisa was upset with her. And weighing on Angie the most right now are flirty texts her brow lady received from Mr. Jared Osmond and whether she should tell Britani. But most importantly, it doesn’t seem like there is a clear queen bee this season. Nobody is particularly feared or more powerful than anyone just yet — maybe this trip will establish a different dynamic with the two new additions.

The women decide on two group activities, joining Whitney at the bobblehead museum or gambling before heading to the Bucks game. It’s when getting ready that we see Bronwyn, who brought her glam squad, tell Angie there’s a new layer to her anger towards Lisa.

Before I get into that, I find Bronywyn bringing a glam squad funny. Nobody else seems to have brought theirs (at least for this first night), and it feels like Bronwyn is trying a bit hard to be a Real Housewife™. You’re going to a bobblehead museum and then a Bucks game! We get it, you are rich. But this idea of her maybe trying a bit too hard also is seen in her conversation with Angie. In that same car ride where she went so hard on Whitney it made Heather uncomfortable, Lisa shit-talked Whitney’s friend, Meili, spreading gossip that she might be banned from returning stuff at Nordstrom because she did it too much.

I agree that that is a fair point. Why is some shit-talking too far and indicative of a shady personality, and other shit talk is not? On its surface, I get it. I see this more as Bronwyn trying to prove she will not lay low and accept this group’s dynamics, perhaps a way to shake up the group hierarchy, which is already fragile. If she truly hopes for some type of justice, though, she should save her energy.

On the other side, we see a debrief from Whitney and Heather. These two can go from being so toxic to acting like sisters, which is what being distant relatives is all about. Heather is not convinced Bronwyn is harmless, and as Whitney later says, her distrust of Bronwyn is projected from her past experiences. Heather doesn’t want to get Monica’d again, and I do think there was a different tone with how Bronwyn said things about Whitney to Heather and Meredith than how she said it to Whitney herself.

The women go off to do their pregame activities. It breaks my heart to see Britani be down bad for Jared. She is so down bad, we actually don’t know anything else about her yet. I wish I could tell her to RUN the other direction, which is why I felt a lot of gratitude for Lisa who took her phone from her to text Jared in a more aloof manner. It says a lot about Britani that Lisa is showing her how to be chill. It’s refreshing to see Lisa finally do something other than argue and be a victim. I do love Lisa when she’s being chill.

After hearing from Whitney during their gossip session that she felt hostility from Meredith over asking her to bring caviar, Heather then makes the idiotic move of telling Meredith at their casino excursion. If two friends are in a rocky place that could easily be mended, why insert yourself in this way? Heather loves seeing herself as a very honest person who says what needs to be said, but this is an unnecessary position to put you in.

I do love where Meredith takes this. When she tells Heather that she was getting tagged on social media with information that Whitney’s brand is allegedly stealing designs from Alibaba and selling them for a lot more (I think this is dropshipping), she comes from an angle that, once again, this is an affront to her as a businesswoman. This is definitely juicy information, and I don’t doubt it is true, but it’s not an insult to Meredith Marks, and of course, Heather encourages Meredith to confront Whitney about it. Talk about stirring the pot.

Once they head to the Bucks game, I am once again delighted by Angie’s dedication to being Greek. She sadly does not meet Giannis Antetokounmpo, but I believe she will one day.

Mary has a few weird moments in this episode: not wanting to fly private with the ladies, picking up a call from her son who asks her to Cash App him sixty dollars, and also just her being at a bobblehead museum. However, Mary says the craziest thing she’s said in a long time — maybe since she told Whitney a cartoonish about how a woman at her church was ejected from her car?  In the Bucks suite, Angie asks Mary if she wants her to get some tissue from the restroom. When Mary replies to her by saying, “I don’t use public restrooms; I have to wait.” I thought, Typical Mary can’t piss outside her home. But when she added, “I always wear a tampon and it holds it,” I paused the show. Excuse me? Mary wears a super tampon, not having a period, because it helps her hold in her pee? The same Mary who said just two episodes ago she doesn’t take baths because she is afraid of UTIs? I wish so badly I could study this woman.

My shock at a new Mary fact quickly disappears when we see Britani get humiliated by her situationship. Angie is still holding onto the information her brow lady gave her, and as she watches Britani on FaceTime with Jared, she tells Bronwyn about the texts. I don’t like how Angie is moving here. It sucks being the messenger of news like this, but why tell Bronwyn, who’s been pretty mean to Britani, a woman she barely knows. Britani comes off strong, and her entire thing has been chasing a man who will not claim her. But the moment Britani realizes they’re talking about her and is told about the damning texts, I feel pretty sorry for her. It feels very high school. Yes, Britani is an adult woman who probably should know better, but it’s clear she is in a lot of pain. I’m glad Meredith comforts her while she cries in the bathroom.

Bronwyn moves on to her big confrontation with Lisa and Heather. I found it to be a bit gross how she told Meili (who is on this trip as a friend of Whitney) about what Lisa and Heather said about her in the car that one time, only because it was to make her own point to Lisa and Heather. She doesn’t care about Meili, and I don’t like how she’s being used as a pawn which becomes evident with where she takes this argument.

I’m learning here that Bronwyn and Lisa are quite similar, maybe more so than they both know. Bronwyn didn’t feel defended, but Lisa did back her up, just not passionately. It sounds familiar because that’s how Lisa feels with everyone who doesn’t stand up for her in the exact way she believes they should.

Bronwyn is so dead set on proving this group does not operate in a way that’s fair. But again, does she realize where she is and who she’s dealing with? I love when a new housewife tries to shake it up, but Bronwyn should tone it down and rework her strategy. Heather talking a little shit about Whitney or agreeing with shit talking, is not the same thing as Bronwyn doing it. You can’t enter a friend group that has collectively dealt with Jen Shah and Monica Garcia and expect to be trusted right away.