Thanksgiving 2012

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This may go down in history as the very worst post I've ever written.

Which actually makes it kind of exciting. Historic in a way really.

But nonetheless ... a terrible post in terms of writing. Mainly because there isn't going to be any. This is going to be a pretty picture post. You see, it's Sunday night and I've just spent the past 3 days cooking, preparing, serving and cleaning. I said my last entertaining word around 1 hour ago when our last guests left.

Then I fell into a heap on the floor.

Oh ... you know what ... I think I actually got the timeline wrong. The heaping happened around 3 hours before the guests left. It was an unfortunate incident which you will see more of in a moment.

O.K. Onto the Thanksgiving dinner inspiration photos 'cause I know you like those.

No more writing.

At all.

None.

Start looking at the pictures now.

The meal began early in the day gathering tomatoes from the garden for the Caprese salad.

It already sounds idyllic doesn't it? I mean come on. Gathering tomatoes from the garden for God's sake?

I D Y L L I C

The front porch was swept ...

... and the planters planted.

I know! Totally pretty. Idyllic if you will.

20 people came for Thanksgiving dinner tonight.

Not a single one of them came in the front door.

Every SINGLE one of them came in the back door.

Once in the house everyone was greeted by the menu in the kitchen.

For the first time in 15 years I changed our Thanksgiving menu.

In anticipation of this I stocked up on lots of booze to send my guests into an alcohol induced haze.

That plan worked on everyone who was drinking.

Everyone else wanted to know where the hell the White Trash Salad was.

The table.

This is what last years table and outdoor festivities looked like, with mismatched antique plates.

This year I went all white rectangular. Snazzy.

I gathered all of the moss around the table at the cottage last year and this year.

Again with the idyllic.

You know this whole idyllic thing is going to end soon, right?

Because nobody lives their lives this way.

My Thanksgiving is no different than yours.

It's a shit show.

The kids table.

Maple Sugar suckers to make 'em happy,

and personalized chalkboards to keep 'em busy.

Shockingly ... this little plan actually worked.

The kids stayed and ate at their own table without wandering into the grown up room where the stripper was performing.

The meal ended with SEVERAL pies including apple, cherry cheese pie and the star of the show,

Pumpkin Pie made with real pumpkin

Then it was just a matter of the Great Gobble Off and shoving everyone out the door.

(video to follow in the next week or so) (of the gobble off, not shoving everyone out the door)

Everyone left out the back door as well.

Luckily I anticipated this and did planters by the back door as well.

Seems nice doesn't it?

A lovely Thanksgiving.

And it was.

For everyone who managed to squeeze into the dining room.

Seems I underestimated how big 15 people are.

Me, one of my sisters and my niece quietly ate in the kitchen.

We had no cutlery.

Or chairs.

The cutlery was on the dining room table at our place settings which were taken over by my apparently enormous family and we felt stupid going to get it.

I found 3 teaspoons which we all ate our Thanksgiving dinner with.

See? Even if someone's life looks idyllic, it probably isn't. Which is not to say it isn't fun. Or enjoyable. Or hilarious. My non idyllic evening was all of those things.

Or so I thought as I sat, in a heap on the floor.

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