<em>Game of Thrones</em>' Riskiest Marriage Plot Yet

Spencer Kornhaber, Christopher Orr, and Amy Sullivan discuss the latest episode of Game of Thrones.

Orr: Wait a minute. There’s a royal wedding—and nobody dies a horrible death? A man is beheaded—and we can all agree that it was for the best? What the hell show am I watching? I came here for Game of Thrones, baby, not Wizards of Waverly Place.

I kid, of course. Given David Benioff and D.B. Weiss’s tendency to take George R. R. Martin’s material and render it even more bloody than it already was, I’m actually mildly relieved that they didn’t throw in a random homicide just to spice up the nuptials of Margaery and young Tommen, First of His Name.

They did, however, substantially spice up the newlyweds’ sex life. “Surely four times is enough,” sighs an exhausted Margaery. Surely. Oh well, it beats the aforementioned alternative. Make love, not war, and all that.

In tonight’s episode, Benioff and Weiss also launched their most ambitious departure from the books to date, with Littlefinger’s plot to marry Sansa to Ramsay Bolton. I have several thoughts on this, so I’ll save it for last.

“High Sparrow” opens with Arya discovering that life in the House of Black and White is not nearly as much fun as she thought it would be. “I didn’t come here to sweep floors,” she complains to Jaqen H’ghar. “No?” he replies. “Why come then?” Zing! At least Arya has such treats in store as getting smacked around by a blind girl and sponge-bathing a dead guy. Ah, the glamorous life of a faceless assassin …

Speaking of glamour, I’m glad that Lord Commander Jon Snow has finally gotten around to the issue we’ve been waiting for lo these many seasons: the new latrine pit.