ok so let's just accept the whole vaguely misogynistic jazz bro thing for now, whatever. He likes jazz and brings her to a jazz club to teach her about jazz, fine. But then she--whose entire character is "I like old Hollywood movies and want to be an actress"--has never seen Rebel Without A Cause?? We're not only expected to be ok with the jazz mansplaining, but then also HE is the one who has to take HER to see Rebel Without A Cause??

In the opening number they make the decision to use natural lighting, which is admirable. But the problem is that unless it's high noon, the sun creates shadows. And so to have a musical number where the camera moves around 360, half of the time the dancers' faces are in shadow! What the fuck

If we're going for a Fred and Ginger thing where the girl keeps getting annoyed by the guy in random interactions, why wasn't he the one who spilled his coffee on her?

Splitting the movie into four sections based on seasons: what does this add?

City of Stars is terrible. What is this song about? Is it "their song"? They already have an (admittedly beautiful) instrumental theme. City of Stars does nothing for the plot, and it's not enjoyable as a song!

Why is the emotional climactic fight scene between them not a musical number?

Why cast two people who can't sing or dance? It's not fair to them. That scene in the beginning where Emma stone is getting ready and going to the party? and she's with her friends who are clearly professional dancers and they're in those nicely bright colored dresses doing the same choreography? but she's bad at it! Of course, if you put her with professionals all doing the same thing, she won't look good! It's not a nice thing to do to your star.

The number on the highway where it's a long tracking show and a standard AABA tin pan alley song could have been great, but they can't dance! You know how in "Good Morning" in Singing In The Rain, Donald O'Connor and Gene Kelly do all the fancy stuff to distract you from Debbie Reynolds just doing the basics? That's what this number is like except they're both Debbie Reynolds.

Yes I cried in the audition song, I'm not a monster

What's song bad about "I Ran"? Flock Of Seagulls rules but even if you don't think that, why was it so much worse for him to play the keyboard part to "I Ran" than "Take On Me"?

Would that John Legend jazz fusion pop band ever be that popular? of course not

This film spends so much time showing him doing his work. Practicing, performing, successful, unsuccessful. We see so much of his craft. But we get nothing from her except 2 auditions and the tiniest of glimpse at her one woman show.

I've only seen this film once, when it was in theaters, but every single moment is seared into my memory. It's a terrible film.

Loved seeing Tom Everett Scott at the end, though.