PAPER ROSES

This Ozark Farm chick was shakin' like a fifty cent ladder on gutter cleanin' day when I listened to the weather and heard the frost warnins. When I turned in late last night it was thirty seven degrees and droppin'. My heart sank like a mobsters victim. Oh, my beautiful roses had buds, all my lovely perennials had pushed their heads through the earth. I'm a tad high strung and wound tighter that a three day clock but late last night....I would'a made a pressure cooker look calm.

At thirty one degrees the Ponderosa's frost holler is was colder than a tick on a Mississippi coon hound on a Montana morning. The daylilies foliage blackened bowin' their heads to the earth, my spirit plummeted lower than a snake full of buckshot. Checkin' the curly leaves on my roses. my mind was transported to a science project in our Special Ed. classroom. 'Loved those kiddos and I'd fight tigers in the dark with a switch for 'em unlike their classmates, Middle Schoolers are empathy challenged. 'Just sayin'.........

Each year we would help our very special students participate in the Middle School Science Fair. We had many projects over the years. Little Miss Feisty kept eatin' her atom molecules constructed with Skittles. Mr. I Believe I Can Fly grew colorful salt crystals but the one that really touched my heart was a little sweetheart I'll call Lilly Pie.

Lilly Pie was a 'special' student in the fifth grade. She lived with her mother, little sister and her Mom's boyfriend. Lilly lived in a dysfunctional home at best and had been showin' definite signs of sexual abuse. When Social Services confirmed the situation Lilly's mother was told that she could not have the girls in the house if the boyfriend stayed. Miss Pie's mother told this tender~hearted ten year old girl, "well somebody's gotta leave and it's not gonna be 'him'." 'Broke my heart into a thousand pieces. She was moved into her single grandfathers house. Doesn't that just frost your ankles?

Sweeter than a meal of biscuits and chocolate gravy served with southern sweet tea, this little lady approached us with her Science Fair idea. Roses!!! Woohoo, bestow my heart. Lilly Pie wanted to make a presentation on plantin' and growin' roses. She expressed the desire to present her project in book form. She chose plain old pink copy paper for the pages. Lilly then used the computer to find information and pictures that she would use for her book simply titled 'Roses'.

We helped Lilly glue the information on the pages along with the pictures she'd chosen with good old rubber cement. After everything had dried we used a binder to bind her project together. Simple supplies, nothin' special. Just a little copy paper, printer ink and some rubber cement. We left the project in Lilly Pies cubby in the classroom and locked the door behind us.

I've experienced several supernatural unexplainable remarkable acts of God in my lifetime but this one was for Lilly Pie. The next mornin' as we were thumbin' though Miss Pie's project the scent of roses arose from the pages. We passed the book around to our coworkers and the more the book was handled the stronger the scent became. I went back and sniffed the copy paper which smelled like plain old paper. I checked the rubber cement and it reeked of...well...rubber cement. Heck, I even checked the printer ink. The only explanation I could come up with it that God wanted to make Lilly's project as special as her.

Isn't that just like our Heavenly Father? He takes our brokenness and turns it into something whole and special. He raises us up from that bottomless pit just when we think there is no hope into life abundantly. He guides us to the light when lost in darkness. He takes a young girl's simple project and makes it stand out from the others. That rose scent lasted through the Science Fair and was still strong when we sent it home.

In 1993, Olive Marie Osmond sang the popular song written by Fred Spielman and Janice Torre that was originally Anita Bryant's hit in 1960. Marie's version topped the country charts then crossed over to pop and easy listenin'. I know that Miss Lilly Pie or I will never ever forget the science project that was simply made of 'Paper Roses!!!

'Just thinkin' 'bout it makes me happier than a monkey with a peanut machine!



(These pictures are from my rose garden last summer)

Easter Parade (Woohoo Giveaway)

The Easter Bunny was born or hatched (that one is still kinda bogglin' the greatest scientific minds) in southwest Germany. Often refereed to as the Easter Hare, he was recorded in written publication durin' the 1500's. This Ozark Farm Chick is quite smitten with the chocolate version. MMMMmmm, my tummies rumblin' and the thighs are quiverin' just thinkin' about the savory little fella. The first edible Easter eggs were developed in Germany during the early 19th century concocted with pastry and sugar. The notion of the delightful Spring Bunny was introduced to the United States by German Pennsylvania Dutch settlers. Although the Chocolate Easter Bunnies are my favorite this chick also collects her fair share of the adorable cottontails. Yep, tucked here, yonder and there, ya'll can find a bunny hidden 'round almost every corner here on the Ponderosa. They make my heart flip! Aren't they the cutest???

To celebrate Love, Spring and Easter that sweet Beki over at The Rusted Chain is offerin' two of you faithful readers a $25.00 gift certificate to her beautiful online store. Now, doesn't that make you skirt fly all the way up? Shoot, she's even makin' me a beautiful personalized necklace for hostin' this great giveaway. Woohoo!!! Her most original and unique handcrafted jewelry has been featured in various magazines, advertisements, upscale boutiques and has been spotted on the sets of shows like Law and Order Criminal Intent. The Rusted Chain features Beki's Christian themed and custom baubles that ya'll can even add a personal touches to. Her Designs are a mix of rustic elegance for today's fashionista's. Beki's a farm chick herself who lives with her hubby and three beautiful youngens in an old farmhouse. Ya'll can also visit her on her on The Rusted Chain Blog where she shares the love of God, her beautiful photography and a little piece of her world. Please go visit both Beki's store and blog. Ya'll be happier than a starvin' buzzard with sun-baked road kill!!!

The love that God has for his children just blows my mind all to thunder. The fact that he loved us all, no matter our faults or failures, so unconditionally that He sacrificed His only Son to die a most horrific death for us. Wow!!! That makes me high as country air! Easter is a special time for all mankind. Some celebrate by participating in festivities like an Easter Parade. This popular melody was written by Irving Berlin in 1917 where he later added words and published the song in 1933. Bing Crosby sang it in the 1942 film Holiday Inn. I want ya'll to enter my Easter Giveaway simply by leavin' a comment to celebrate Easter. Then ya'll can go put on your new fancy dresses, frilly bonnets, shinny new shoes and some new beautiful jewelry by Beki and head out to the "Easter Parade"!!!

Happy Easter and the best of luck to ya'll!

COLD AS ICE

I make no bones that I think winter is about as useful as a rubber crutch. This Ozark Farm Chick is a summertime gal. I thrive in my biker shorts, cute little tees and flippies. I adore workin' my acre of flower gardens and afternoon dips in my swimmin' pool. Ya know, the things dreams are made of. This winter has been colder than a cast iron commode on the shady side of an iceberg and I have not hidden the fact that 'Nezzy' has not been a happy camper. With that said, of all things I could collect... I collect snowmen!!! I know, that makes me about a crazy as a sprayed roach but I love the little cold~hearted fellas. You will fine 'em nestled into every nook and corner of the Ponderosa's homestead from the edge of Autumn through the early stages of Spring.

Woohoo!!! It's Deep Clean Friday and I've been busier than a set of jumper cables at a Redneck picnic. Yep, faucets sparkle, furnace filters cleaned, floors shine and the dust mites are gaspin' for air. Ya'll know how clean rocks my world but as I was cleanin' I had little eyes givin' me cold hard stares. I'm thinkin'...it might be time to put my crystal gents with the carrot noses away, Spring bein' Sunday and all. Ponderin' on how each and every snowflake is as unique and individual as God made us, I carefully wrapped each snowman to be packed away. In doin' so I noticed that some of my snowmen have yellowed over the years while others are still pure white. Yellowed kinda like us when we allow sin into our lives. Psalm 51:7 says "Purge me with hyssop, and I shall be clean: wash me, and I shall be whiter than snow." Now, I can't take the aromatic plant hyssop used to clean in ancient days to wash away my sins but this plant was also used in religious rituals in comparison to the blood of Christ. That's somethin' this chick can wrap her brain around! Now, if that don't put the pepper in the Gumbo!!!

Ya'll know that goin' to church doesn't make ya a Christian anymore than standin' in a garage makes ya a car. Far to often we are yellowed with unkindness we show others instead of reflectin' love of Jesus. Our hearts can become as stinkin' cold as the little snowmen I just packed away. Spring is upon us, a time of rebirth and new beginnings. I don't want to be like the 1977 British~American band Foreigner who sang "Cold as Ice" on their Billboard Hot 100 list record. As the warm rays of the sun melts winter's remnants from the earth, I yearn for The Son to warm my soul allowin' me radiate the warmth of His precious love. I want to be a servant, a warm lovin' child of God. I want it to never be said of me that "she was...Cold as Ice!!!"

QUE SERA SERA (Whatever Will Be Will Be)

She can be as delicate as the soft crepe petals on a lovely jeweled Poppy gently swayin' in a soothing breeze or as ferocious as an irritated badger on it's last nerve when it comes to protecting the spawn of her loins. This child-bearer was present at your debut counting all your wiggly chubby pink digits and memorizing every cell of your being. She commands respect simply by walking into a room while indulging and promoting your sometimes ridiculous creativity. This forbearer obtains the capability to make you feel loved despite the most disastrous circumstances. Webster defines a mother as a female parent but this Ozark farm chick knows a mother is so much more!

This song from Alfred Hitchcock's 1956 film "The Man Who Knew Too Much" staring Doris Day and James Stewart becoming sweet Doris' signature tune often filled our home. Mama could be heard singin', "When I was just a little girl I asked my mother, what will I be?" God blessed this chick richly with a special Mom. She cradled and nurtured me when I was ill takin' any pain away with her tender kisses. The woman changed many dirty diapers taggin' me "Stinky Britches!" She would humor me as she sat an extra plate on the table for my imaginary girlfriend and softly smiled when I insisted that she button John's bright red coat. ( Yep, John was a girl, I'm twisted like that!) She is the one that came to my rescue when I had to see if you could really get your toe stuck in the bathtub faucet just like Mary Richards on the Dick Van Dyke Show or the time as a tween I pulled the top drawer from the dresser to smell the sachet I'd placed in my underwear drawer below and got my head stuck. Let me tell ya'll Mama had the patience of a saint 'cause with my curiosity and imagination this little farm chicklett was a handful. She is also the woman who made me want to dig a hole and pull it in behind me never to see the light of day again my Junior year when she innocently walked up behind in front on a group of friends and casually asked, "are you ready to go Stinky Britches???"

"When I have children of my own they ask their mother, what will I be? Will I be handsome, will I be rich? I tell them tenderly...", I can still hear Mom singin' these words. Her face gleamed with joy as she sang to her first grandbaby. Mom was right there to watch over and help ride herd on this little guy. She was the first on the spot to help out when our perfect baby girl was born with an imperfect heart. I was torn between my three year old fella and my sick baby girl who took round the clock care when Mama jumped in to lessen my load. She cheered with a tear in her eye and a song in her heart as both children graduated, married and blessed her with beautiful Great-grandkids. Yep, just as Mama sang, "Que sera, sera, whatever will be, will be...the future's not ours, to see..que sera, sera", once again Mama was right.

The picture above is filled with Mothers. Mothers who are bountifully more than just female parents. I see Great-Granny Moon who loved and lived life well over a hundred. I was around ten years old when I was privileged to witness the bonfire of a hundred birthday candles blazin' on her cake. She blew them out herself. My Grandmother Dow who I called "Ma" was just an amazing woman who lost her husband at the age of forty-five and maintained the most positive attitude I've ever known. My own precious Mother who will celebrate her eighty first birthday in August. Me??? Why I'm the skinny little thing with her mouth wide open, no doubt beltin' out a tune just like Doris Day's "Que Sera Sera!"

Thanks Mom....I love you!!! HAPPY MOTHERS DAY

FAITH CAN MOVE A MOUNTAIN

 

Taller than one of Granny Walden's elevated folk tales or a lofty as a menopausal giraffe's migraine headache we all have a mountain in our life. It can as gigantic as the Earths tallest Mount Everest which towers 29,029 feet in the Asian Himalaya mountain range or as challenging as the northern frigid Alaska's Mount McKinley reachin' a massive 20,230 feet extending her snow-capped head above the arctic clouds.

Calamities of life load us down like a miner's pack mule on a narrow rocky path with life's mountains. Ya'll know the kind that rock your world and turn your insides wrong side out. The ringing phone in the middle of the night informing you of a loved one who just joined the angel band. The face of a surgeon when he tells you that your tiny precious baby girl will probably not make it through the night or the next operation. The tone in your veterinarian's voice tellin' you that some strange weed is killing off your prized hog herd. Financial disasters that have your heart weighted down like a chubby prisoner in a striped jumpsuit chained to a ball and shackle. Yep, these are just a few of the many mountains that have been tossed this chick's way but let me tell ya baby, there's victory in them there hills and the weapon of choice is called FAITH!

The Bible tells us in the Gospel of Mathew 17:20, "If you have the faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, move from here to there, and it will move." Now, those of us that are gettin' a little long in tooth might even need some spectacles or a giant sized magnifyin' glass to even spot a little old mustard seed so we're not talkin' a whole boatload of faith here. Today I challenge you to use that faith to move the many mountains Satan throws in your life path. I've been absent, missin' in action and lax in bloggin' lately. I have been movin' my own little mountain with a potato diggin' fork, a tall white plastic bucket,a big yellow wheelbarrow and a whole lotta faith. The week has been productive. The corn crop is in the ground, fertilized and all. We loaded out three forty foot gooseneck trailers of cow calf pairs and I made a dent in my big old dump truck load of hardwood mulch that forms my mulch mountain.

Guy Woods wrote song lyrics in 1952 that stated," faith can move mountains darling you will see, I can move mountains if you have faith in me." Forget the wrenching convulsion of the charlie horses in this Ozarks farm chicks girlie gams. Never mind the throbbin' spasms that spur the pulsating tenderness in my fifty seven year old lumbar, my acre of flower beds will be dressed and the trees circled with wonderful weed preventin' mulch. I'm keepin' the faith baby singin' right along with Nat King Cole 'cause "FAITH CAN MOVE MOUNTAINS!!!"

SEALED WITH A KISS

Abominable Snowmen, Yeti, Forodwaith, Yuki Daruma or just plain old Frosty the Snowmen all melt away like a big old triple scoop bowl of Cappuccino Chocolate Chunk ice cream when the toasty spring weather begins warm the frozen earth. A snowman is an anthropomorphic icy sculpture of a human. The first documented snowman was noted by Bob Eckststine in his book titled "Book of Hours" in 1380. The largest snowman ever recorded was in 2008 in Bethel, Maine who towered a grand twenty~two feet, one inch tall. Heck, these cold hearted fellas even celebrate their own holiday on January 18th known as World Day of Snowmen. I've made no bones about my own abomination towards those tiny frozen lace doilies floatin' from the sky or how I loathe the nuisance of feedin' critters and replenishing the woodpile in it's cold repulsive layers. Ya'll get the picture, I dislike snow intensely finding it most unfriendly but even to my surprise, I collect snowmen. I know.......isn't it a shocker?

Yep, this Ozark farm chick has 'em stashed everywhere. They come out before Christmas and hide in the ivy or hang around the fireplace. My little recipe holder snowman enjoys sittin' on my kitchen cabinet. They hang off doorknobs, hunker down in baskets and snuggle on the sofa in the living room. As much as I despise the snow I love all my little snowmen tucked in every nook and cranny of the Ponderosa's homestead.

Today as ya'll know is deep clean Friday. The day I enjoy chasin' those dust bunnies right out the door. The day germs are destroyed and everything shines brightly. Oh baby I've got the cleanin' bug bad but folks it's also Spring. Time to bring out the fresh garden pillows. Time to open the windows and air out the house. Time for the snowmen to be gathered and packed away safely 'till next year. I found myself singin' (I know that's hard for some of your to imagine...heeehehe!) that old 1960's song of Gary Lewis and the Playboys,"Sealed Withe a Kiss." "Though we gotta say goodbye for the Summer," I,m beltin' out as I pack these well rounded gents away thinkin' maybe just maybe as the last snowman is laid to rest and the box is closed it'll be "Sealed With A Kiss!"

HAPPY SPRING EVERYBODY!!!

RAINY DAYS AND MONDAYS

Rainy days and Mondays may get you down but not this wacky farm chick. My grass is green lush and deep enough to lose my youngest grandchild, the weeds are growing faster than a speeding locomotive, I have not spread my weed and feed or treated the acre of flower gardens for grubs or ticks this spring. Everything needs mulched. I wasted three beautiful summer like days last week. The first wasted day was spent going to the dentist. A much dreaded task for me. I would prefer any of the above chores rather than kick'in back in the ole dental chair. The second day was spent in the city for my MIL's two hour eye appointment and the third wasted day was spent with my head shoved into the ice cave. (defrosting my freezer... butchered a beef) But a rainy day for me is spent catching up my reading, going through catalogs and entering those online contest that I've piled up next to my computer. Today I ordered yet another rose bush (can't help myself..OCFD..obsessive compulsive flower disorder) and a special rose fertilizer to feed my menagerie of roses. I picked out some lavender plants to replace those I lost through the winter. Yes, I try to use my rainy days to catch up on those things I tend to push aside as the weather warms.

As I was clipping coupons this afternoon something caught my attention out the window. A dozen brilliant flame-orange and black Baltimore Orioles landed in my back yard. Their rich, piping whistled notes were singing praises of thanks for the oranges and grape jelly I have been putting out in the anticipation of the arrival of these beauties. These birds are defiantly the real clowns of their species. They made me laugh as they slid side-ways down feeder poles, hung upside down on the feeders and tried their best to drink from the hummingbird feeder using every acrobatic movement they have acquired . A real three ring circus bonanza was portrayed contributing a bright ray of sunshine on my otherwise rainy Monday.

WAKE UP MAGGIE

Spring is finally knocking on Mother Earths door with all the signs and signals I look forward to. The bluebirds have chosen their favored real estate and set up housekeeping. The very enjoyable acrobats of the air appeared at my hummingbird feeder last week. Yesterday I spotted a Monarch butterfly on a brilliant yellow dandelion blowing in the wind. Peepers (little froggies) are filling the nights darkness with their active shrill voices. The flora and fauna are bursting forth producing green hues and wonderful colored flowers. I LOVE this time of year!!! It's like I have hibernated all winter and I am coming out of my cozy cocoon into this beautiful new world.

One thing I anticipate seeing with great excitement is Maggie. Maggie is an entertaining comical mockingbird who befriended me several years ago. She follows me around the yard as I dig, pull and pluck my way through my many flower gardens. She can mimic our cats meow and has the squeak of my wheelbarrow down to a fine art. Maggie's best show is the song and dance routine she performs to the oldies atop the transformer as I swim every afternoon. I am a creature of habit and go out to the pool around the same time everyday . If I am late I can always count on Maggie to beckon me with her repertoire until I show up. You might be saying this farm chick spends way too much time alone but I really enjoy this bird.

This is the time of year I begin to worry about this favored mockingbird. I'm usually not one to worry but my mind begins to ponder upon the many things that could happen to old Mag during our long hard winter. Ya know things like Maggie becoming part of the food chain or buried in the snow. So as I break forth the lawnmower, potting soil and annuals I will keep one eye roving in search of Maggie the mockingbird.

I DON'T LIKE SPIDERS AND SNAKES

If anyone questions the existence of God, all one has to do is open his eyes on a spring day. Yes, I awoke Friday on vernal equinox to a beautiful morning in the Ozarks. (You CAN actually stand an egg on end during equinox.) I watched as a pair of deeply colored bluebirds were busy gathering furnishings for a home in the birdhouse just beyond my bedroom window. As I continued my deep clean Friday, I gazed through the sunbeams streaming through the living room window to the ornamental pear tree adorned with flowers like a fluffy mound of cotton candy. The earths canvas is coming to life. Only God can paint the earth with all this glory, I call it spring.

Last night I heard peepers singing their melodies from the pond. The reptiles are awakening to life after a long hard winter. This morning as I was restocking the woodpile, (hence forecast, cold front...hinting for snow, burrrr...), I lifted a log that had a snake snuggled beneath it. Now granted, it was a tiny snake that looked just like a copperhead. I have been told that baby blacksnakes look just like the dreaded copperhead and how beneficial it is to have blacksnakes on a farm but I believe ALL snakes are evil. Yep, the only good snake in my world is a dead snake. I whacked that little devils brains with the wood in my hand the proceeded to stomp it with my husbands manure stompin' boots until the thing lay lifeless. Feeling all the while that I had just defeated Satan because I don't like spiders or snakes. Welcome Spring!!!

FLASH

Yesterday was the perfect beautiful spring Ozark day. The sun was warming the calls of the birds whose songs had that mate attracting tone to them. My 38 rose bushes have put forth tiny new leaves pushing from their canes. The perennials have burst forth from the earth adorning her with hundreds of crowns casting green visions of warm weather. Yes, you read this correctly, I said hundreds....this is due to my COFD. (Compulsive Obsessive Flower Disorder) This beautiful day was given to us to bask in and enjoy to the depths of our bare little toes. I put on the summer tee, shorts and flip-flops and began to doing just that. Pushing aside the weather report and forgetting for just a few hours it is not really spring.

Our local forecast was calling for 75-80 degrees with approaching storms consisting of damaging winds, hail, heavy downpours and possible tornado activity. Following the storm would be a severe temperature drop of 40 degrees in about four hours. OUCH!!! Knowing this is probably an accurate prediction of our forecast I deemed it time to prepare for the upcoming event. So here I am in my cute summer tee, bouncing ponytail, shorts and flippies carrying in firewood for the approaching cold front. As I am working as diligently as a colony of ants, I have beads of dew building up on my forehead. Thinking here I am in shorts, sweating like crazy and carrying firewood...what is wrong with this picture?

Like a fine tuned prophet the storm moved in laced with rain, thunder and furious straight line winds dropping the mercury like a rock from a high rise. After filling the fireplace last night the thermometer read 29 degrees as I trotted off to my heated water bed.

I arose at 5:00 am to a 17 degree day, soooo not yesterday! I pulled the sweatshirt, long leggings and socks out to snuggle in today. I put away the shorts, summer tee and flip-flops. But not too far away, for I know as the warm comforting chili simmers on the the burner today, like a flash another spring day will arrive.

Ga' Day

This morning is off to a good start. The sun is glowing, glistening against the aqua blue sky. The birds are singing just beckoning that first day of spring. My day lilies are poking their green little heads through the earth just to get a peek of what's to come. Combine all this together and Mama gets the itch to go out and get my hands dirty. Then, like a slap in the face the wind hits me with its 20 degree force and I realize that I really need coveralls and a stocking cap to be out in these elements. So my dream day is put on the back burner and I put another log on to fuel the crackling fire in the fire place that feels so wonderful to me right now. I just have to wait and we all know how well I wait !!!!!

You all have just a wonderfully blessed day,
Mom