ByBethy Squires,
a Vulture news blogger who covers comedy
Fox’s The Masked Singer is no stranger to controversial guest stars. Sarah Palin rapped “Baby Got Back” as the Bear in season three. And Logan Paul played a monster (what a reach!) in 2021. But the latest stunt casting was too much even for hosts Ken Jeong and Robin Thicke. That’s right, Robin Thicke had ethical qualms. According to Deadline, both Jeong and Thicke walked off-set when it was revealed Rudy “Four Seasons Total Landscaping” Giuliani was one of season seven’s masked singers. Deadlinedeclined to spill which figure Giuliani is, “so you can still revel in his reveal,” but we here at Vulture have no such compunctions. Which dead-eyed mascot contains a dead-eyed former mayor within its foam-latex flesh? Let the wild speculation begin!
Season seven’s contestants are split into three categories: the Good, the Bad, and the Cuddly. Truly anyone’s guess which one the producers think Giuliani belongs in. They are a Frog Prince, some sort of Fetishwear Moth, an Armor Guy, a Cyclops, a Space Rabbit, and a Thotty Lemur. Giuliani has done drag before (and got motor-boated by Trump while doing it), so let’s not rule out the Moth and Lemur just yet.
Frog Prince: Giuliani could be the Frog Prince, because he too is a political animal. Frog Princes are known for demanding kisses, which … well, you saw Borat 2, right? And let’s not forget his impeccable impression of the queen.
Fetishwear Moth: Moths are attracted to streetlights. This could be an allusion to Giuliani’s adoption of “broken windows”–style policing, which focuses on the visible signs of crime like broken windows and busted streetlights.
Armor Guy: More like Four Seasons Total Manscaping; look at those armor abs! Again, could be a ref to his tough-on-crime days.
Space Rabbit: Giuliani stayed pretty much out of the Space Force press cycle. But he famously spaces out on cybersecurity on the regular — butt-dialing reporters, texting passwords, and reading his texts online.
Sexy Lemur: Same dark under-eyes? Okay, we’re reaching now.
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