Now that the late-night shows have figured out how to keep producing episodes despite being quarantined during a pandemic, it’s about time soap operas followed suit. With that, behold this exclusive clip from The Longest Days of Our Lives, which Jimmy Fallon unveiled during last night’s Tonight Show. With help from fellow SNLalums Kristen Wiig (as Vanessa and Melinda Charmin — yes, that Charmin) and Will Ferrell (as Alejandro, Montgomery, and Fontaine), Fallon (as Winston) leads a stunning scene of love, loss, betrayal, shocking revelations, and lots of rhyming — all done while the characters are quarantined over video chat. It’s basically “The Californians” if the sketch were done over Zoom, with the performers constantly changing characters via wigs and fake mustaches, and the sketch ending with a big twist from the heiress to the Charmin toilet paper fortune herself. (Also, props to Wiig for delivering the best line suited for our current pandemic chaos: “It’s Vanessa! In quarantine! Beans!!”)
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`;
// integrate Sub(x) scripts and elements
if (hostname !== 'subs.nymag.com') { // do not integrate on this subdomain
document.head.appendChild(trackingScript);
document.body.insertAdjacentHTML('beforeend', subXAnimationElements);
}
There was an error processing the request. Please try again later."}).catch(e=>console.error("Error verifying email: ",e)))(r.querySelector(".content"),o.bannerCTAVerification)})):(l.remove(),s.remove()),o.dismissable||n.remove(),o.useAlertIcon||a.remove(),r.classList.add("show"),n.addEventListener("click",()=>{u(),r.classList.remove("show")})}else r.remove()}});
}, {"1":1,"6":6,"17":17,"35":35,"40":40}];
window.modules["global-nav.client"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";const dom=require(4),auth=require(17),signInButton=dom.find(".user-signin"),signOutButton=dom.find(".user-signout"),globalNav=dom.find('[class^="global-nav"]'),body=dom.find("body"),dropdownItems=dom.findAll(".dropdown-wrap"),gtm=require(1),appendLandingPageParams=require(135),pageUri=require(124).getPageUri(),subscriptionPromoLinks=dom.findAll(".persist-params"),searchString=window.location.search||"";function closeDropdowns(e){let n=globalNav.querySelectorAll(".dropdown.open");dropdownItems.forEach(function(t){let i=t.querySelector(".dropdown");!n||t.contains(e.target)&&27!==e.keyCode||i.classList.remove("open")})}function gtmSendReport(e,n,t){let i={eventCategory:"ecommerce",eventAction:"componentClick",brand:e,dimension23:"global-nav",list:pageUri,pageZone:"header",variant:"nav-link"};"global-nav-link"===t&&(i.eventLabel=n.href),gtm.reportNow(i)}function updateElementTargetUrlsIfQueryStrings(e){if(searchString){const n=new URLSearchParams(searchString);let t=e.href;if(t.includes("?")){const i=t.split("?"),o=new URLSearchParams(i[1]);for(let e of n.entries())o.set(e[0],e[1]);t=`${i[0]}?${o.toString()}`,e.href=t}else e.href=`${t}?${n.toString()}`}}function init(e){const n=e.querySelectorAll(".to-landing-page");window.addEventListener("auth:init",()=>{signInButton.addEventListener("click",function(e){e.preventDefault(),auth.showEmbeddedLoginFlow("top navigation")}),signOutButton.addEventListener("click",function(e){e.preventDefault(),gtmSendReport("Sign Out",e.target,"user-info-link"),auth.logout()}),auth.isAuthenticated()&&e.classList.add("signed-in"),(auth.isSubscriber()||auth.isMobileAppRequest())&&e.classList.add("subscribed"),e.querySelectorAll(".user-link").forEach(e=>{e.classList.add("active")}),subscriptionPromoLinks.forEach(e=>{updateElementTargetUrlsIfQueryStrings(e)}),appendLandingPageParams(n)})}dropdownItems.forEach(function(e){e.addEventListener("click",function(){e.querySelector(".dropdown").classList.toggle("open")})}),body.addEventListener("click",closeDropdowns),document.addEventListener("keydown",closeDropdowns),globalNav.addEventListener("click",function(e){let n=e.target;n.classList.contains("global-nav-track")&>mSendReport(n.text,n,"global-nav-link")}),module.exports=init;
}, {"1":1,"4":4,"17":17,"124":124,"135":135}];
window.modules["aaa-module-mounting.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";const _pickBy=require(221),_each=require(408),Fingerprint2=require(407),DS=require(406),Eventify=require(246);function registerGlobals(){window.DS=DS,window.Eventify=Eventify,window.Fingerprint2=Fingerprint2,DS.value("Eventify",Eventify),DS.value("Fingerprint2",Fingerprint2),DS.value("$document",window.document),DS.value("$window",window)}function mountDollarSliceComponents(){DS.service("components",["$document","$module",function(e,n){var o=_pickBy(n.definitions,e=>e.providerStrategy===n.providers.controller),r=Object.keys(o);function t(e){return o=>{try{n.get(e,o)}catch(e){logMountError(o,e)}}}_each(r,n=>{var o=e.querySelectorAll('[data-uri*="/_components/'+n+'/"]'),r=e.querySelectorAll('[data-uri$="/_components/'+n+'"]');_each(o,t(n)),_each(r,t(n))}),this.components=r}]),DS.get("components")}function logMountError(e,n){const o=e.outerHTML.slice(0,e.outerHTML.indexOf(e.innerHTML));console.error("Error attaching controller to "+o,n)}registerGlobals(),"loading"===document.readyState?document.addEventListener("DOMContentLoaded",()=>{mountDollarSliceComponents()}):mountDollarSliceComponents();
}, {"221":221,"246":246,"406":406,"407":407,"408":408}];
window.modules["ads.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";const _map=require(118),_forEach=require(107),_isString=require(268),_intersectionWith=require(409),_isEqual=require(274),_each=require(408),_debounce=require(182),_sortBy=require(205),page=require(124),visit=require(114);DS.service("adService",["Eventify","$cid","$document","$window",function(e,t,a,i){var o,n,s,r,d,c,u,l,g={},p=this,h=[],f=visit.getQueryParamsObject(["utm_campaign"]),m=document.querySelector('script[data-type="ad-a9"]'),b=[],w=!1,v=[],y=document.querySelector('script[data-name="ad-doubleverify"]');document.querySelector('script[data-name="concert-ads"]')||(i.NYM={},i.NYM.analytics={},i.NYM.analytics.adStartTime=i.performance.now(),i.googletag=i.googletag||{},i.googletag.cmd=i.googletag.cmd||[],u=i.googletag,(m||y)&&(i.googletag.cmd=i.googletag.cmd||[],i.googletag.cmd.push(function(){i.googletag.pubads().disableInitialLoad()})),m&&(l=i.setInterval(function(){void 0!==window.apstag&&void 0!==window.apstag.timeout&&(i.clearInterval(l),window.apstag.cleared=!0,l=null)},10),setTimeout(function(){l&&(i.clearInterval(l),i.googletag.pubads().refresh(),window.apstag||console.log("MESSAGE: Timeout for A9 load exceeded, aborting"))},500)),y&&(b.push(new Promise(function(e){w?e():v.push(e)})),c=i.setTimeout(T,2500)),o=function(e){var t,a,o=e.data,n=[];return o.loaded?e:(o.loaded=!0,t=null,(t=o.sizes?u.defineSlot(o.name,o.sizes,o.id).addService(u.pubads()):u.defineOutOfPageSlot(o.name,o.id).addService(u.pubads())).setTargeting("adid",o.id),f.hasOwnProperty("utm_campaign")&&t.setTargeting("utmcamp",f.utm_campaign),a=p.getAdCount(o.label),t.setTargeting("label",o.label+"_"+o.site+"-"+a),u.display(o.id),u.pubads().addEventListener("slotOnload",function(){i.NYM.analytics.firstAdLoadTime||(i.NYM.analytics.firstAdLoadTime=i.performance.now(),i.NYM.analytics.firstAdLoadLabel=e.data.label)}),n=_(o),Promise.all(b).then(function(){n?window.apstag&&window.apstag.cleared?window.apstag.fetchBids({slots:[n],timeout:window.apstag.timeout},function(){u.cmd.push(function(){window.apstag.setDisplayBids(),u.pubads().refresh([t],{changeCorrelator:!1})})}):y&&u.pubads().refresh([t],{changeCorrelator:!1}):u.pubads().refresh([t],{changeCorrelator:!1})}),e.slot=t,e)},n=function(e){var a,i,o,n=t(),s=e.getAttribute("data-name"),r=e.getAttribute("data-sizes"),d=e.getAttribute("data-label"),c=e.getAttribute("data-site");n=e.id,r&&r.length?(r=r.split(","),a=[],_map(r,function(e){e=e.split("x"),i=parseInt(e[0]),o=parseInt(e[1]),a.push([i,o])})):(e.classList.add("oop"),a=!1),this.data={id:n,name:s,sizes:a,loaded:!1,label:d,site:c},g[n]=this},r=function(e){u.cmd.push(function(){var t=o(e);g[e.data.id]=t})},s=function(e){var t=[];e.slot?(t=_(e))&&window.apstag&&window.apstag.cleared&&window.apstag.fetchBids({slots:[t],timeout:window.apstag.timeout},function(){u.cmd.push(function(){window.apstag.setDisplayBids(),u.pubads().refresh([e.slot],{changeCorrelator:!1})})}):e&&r(e)},u.cmd.push(function(){var e,t,o,n=page.getMeta("article:tag"),s=page.getMeta("author"),r=i.location.href,d=(e=a.head.querySelector(".head-gtm"),t=a.body.querySelector(".gtm"),e&&"top"===e.getAttribute("data-gtm")?"gtmtop":t&&"bottom"===t.getAttribute("data-gtm")?"gtmbottom":"");o=[],_forEach([n,s,d],function(e){_forEach(e.split(","),function(e){(e=e.trim().toLowerCase().replace(/\s/g,"-").replace(/\'|\’/g,"")).length&&o.push(e)})}),u.pubads().setTargeting("kw",o),u.pubads().setTargeting("entry_group",o),r=r.slice(r.lastIndexOf("/")+1),u.pubads().setTargeting("pn",r),u.companionAds().setRefreshUnfilledSlots(!0),u.pubads().enableAsyncRendering(),u.enableServices()}),this.load=r,this.create=function(e){return new n(e)},this.refresh=function(e){var t;_isString(e)?(t=this.getById(e),s(t)):s(e)},this.remove=function(e){var t=e.data.id;a.getElementById(t).innerHTML=""},this.getAdCount=function(e){var t,a=0,i=Object.keys(g);return _each(i,function(i){(t=g[i]).data.loaded&&t.data.label===e&&a++}),a},this.getById=function(e){return g[e]},d=_debounce(function(){var e={TopLeaderboard:1,RightColTopMPU:2,outOfPage:99,"homepageTakeover/TopLeaderboard":1},t=_sortBy(h,function(t){return e[t.data.label]||10});_forEach(t,function(e){return e.data.sizes?r(e):i.setTimeout(function(){r(e)},2e3)}),y&&window.PQ.cmd.push(()=>{try{window.PQ.loadSignals(["ids","bsc","vlp"],T)}catch(e){T(),console.error(`There has been an error loading Double Verify signals: ${e}`)}}),h=[]},10),this.addToPageLoadQueue=function(e){h.push(e),d()});function _(e){var t,a=e.sizes;return a=_intersectionWith(a,[[970,250],[970,90],[728,90],[300,600],[300,250],[320,100],[320,50]],_isEqual),e.sizes&&e.sizes.length&&(t={slotID:e.id,sizes:a,slotName:e.label}),t}function T(){i.clearTimeout(c),w=!0,_forEach(v,function(e){e()})}}]);
}, {"107":107,"114":114,"118":118,"124":124,"182":182,"205":205,"268":268,"274":274,"408":408,"409":409}];
window.modules["cid.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";DS.service("$cid",function(){var r=Math.floor(100*Math.random());return function(){return"cid-"+ ++r}});
}, {}];
window.modules["client.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";require("cid.legacy"),require("ads.legacy"),require("facebook.legacy"),require("aaa-module-mounting.legacy");
}, {"cid.legacy":"cid.legacy","ads.legacy":"ads.legacy","facebook.legacy":"facebook.legacy","aaa-module-mounting.legacy":"aaa-module-mounting.legacy"}];
window.modules["facebook.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";DS.service("facebook",[function(){this.fb=function(i){window.FB&&window.FB[i].apply(this,Array.prototype.slice.call(arguments,1))}}]);
}, {}];
require=(function e(t,n,r){function s(o,u){if(!n[o]){if(!t[o]){var a=typeof require=="function"&&require;if(!u&&a)return a(o,!0);if(i)return i(o,!0);var f=new Error("Cannot find module '"+o+"'");throw f.code="MODULE_NOT_FOUND",f}var l=n[o]={exports:{}};t[o][0].call(l.exports,function(e){var n=t[o][1][e];return s(n?n:e)},l,l.exports,e,t,n,r)}return n[o].exports}var i=typeof require=="function"&&require;for(var o=0;o typeof key === 'string' && key.match(/\.legacy$/)).forEach(key => window.require(key));
}
function tryToMount(fn, el, name) {
try {
fn(el); // init the controller
} catch (e) {
const elementTag = el.outerHTML.slice(0, el.outerHTML.indexOf(el.innerHTML));
console.error(`Error initializing controller for "${name}" on "${elementTag}"`, e);
}
}
/**
* mount client.js component controllers
*/
function mountComponentModules() {
Object.keys(window.modules).filter(key => typeof key === 'string' && key.match(/\.client$/)).forEach(key => {
let controllerFn = window.require(key);
if (typeof controllerFn === 'function') {
const name = key.replace('.client', ''),
instancesSelector = `[data-uri*="_components/${name}/"]`,
defaultSelector = `[data-uri$="_components${name}"]`,
instances = document.querySelectorAll(instancesSelector),
defaults = document.querySelectorAll(defaultSelector);
for (let el of instances) {
tryToMount(controllerFn, el, name);
}
for (let el of defaults) {
tryToMount(controllerFn, el, name);
}
}
});
}
// Make sure that a `window.process.env.NODE_ENV` is available in the client for any dependencies,
// services, or components that could require it
// note: the `` value is swapped for the actual environment variable in /lib/cmd/compile/scripts.js
window.process = window.process || {};
window.process.env = window.process.env || {};
if (!window.process.env.NODE_ENV) {
window.process.env.NODE_ENV = '';
}
// note: legacy controllers that require legacy services (e.g. dollar-slice) must
// wait for DOMContentLoaded to initialize themselves, as the files themselves must be mounted first
mountLegacyServices();
mountComponentModules();
// ]]