The Funniest Reviews of Plymouth Rock Left by Disappointed Tourists
Tourists are really not impressed by Plymouth Rock.
Plymouth Rock carries along its stony back an essential piece of United States history. This slab of granite is the place where, allegedly, the pilgrims first stepped after disembarking from the Mayflower in 1620. Its surrounding area soon became the first permanent European settlement in New England, dubbed New Plymouth. Despite a lack of concrete historical evidence, the rock was identified as the pilgrim’s first landing point around 121 years later, and an American icon was made.
Despite its stately reputation, Plymouth Rock isn’t quite as grand in physical size. It’s said, by local lore and the Encyclopedia Britannica, that when locals tried to move the stone in 1774 it split in two, which locals took this as an omen of their imminent colonial separation from Great Britain. On top of this split, souvenir-hunting visitors gradually reduced its mass over the years, leaving it more modest than some expect.
The rock is currently situated on the shores of Pilgrim Memorial State Park. While the surrounding area of Plymouth, Massachusetts is a quaint town to stop through, some visitors in search of a mind-altering run-in with a grandiose piece of history didn’t quite have their expectations met. Of course, as many Americans do, they took to the reviews. Here’s a sampling of the funniest.
It is, in fact, a rock
Most of their complaints centered around a lack of forewarning about the fact that Plymouth Rock is… just a rock.
“Not sure what I expected to see exactly but it’s a rock. Just a rock, not particularly a big rock. Didn’t really have a bunch of historical information or things to read, kind of just a pit with a rock in it and that’s it.” – Google reviews, October 2024
“Nice area to walk around and Plymouth is very picturesque. The rock itself is just that, a rock. On the ground. And it's not even where the pilgrims landed. It wasn't busy and there's easy access to take a peak. There is also a replica Mayflower to see and plenty of views of the harbour and coastline” – Google reviews, October 2024
“Other than as a Bucket List check off, I can best describe it as underwhelming. It's like a soda with no fiz... There are plenty of really good restaurants close by, and it's worth visiting just for all the good food nearby.” – Google reviews, August 2024
An emotional tie to said rock
Some were more emotional than others.
“Well, I had an an amazing past life recall at this particular spot. When I was looking down at the rock, I was overcome with tears, and I burst into something very emotional and had this vision of me being on the mayflower as a Dutch woman alone.” – Google reviews, September 2024
Rock n Roll
For some, the size of the rock not being what they expected didn’t take away from the experience.
“When do you get the rock alone? Perfect misty, warm night to enjoy the history and scenery” – Google reviews, September 2024
“Rock n roll. Nice, clean park with shops and restaurants all around. There was also a Park Ranger who was able to educate about the history of Plymouth rock and the surrounding area.” — Google reviews, August 2024
“Yes it's just a rock, but not just any rock. The historic value definitely adds to it. Much like a lot of the old sites in Boston, it really puts into context things that books and maps just don't do.” – Google reviews, October 2024
“It’s a rock. Shocker! I know.” – Google reviews, September 2024
Declaration of Independence
One reviewer, who was none-too-pleased with the lack of size warning on the historical stone, took to writing a short story about the experience.
“**Review of Plymouth Rock - The Overhyped Pebble**
“Listen up, folks, I traveled from afar, expecting some sort of grand monument or at least a rock with... I dunno, personality? What I got was Plymouth Rock. Oh boy, where do I start?
“First off, **size matters**, and this rock? It's the equivalent of a geological participation trophy. You'd think the rock that's got an entire Thanksgiving story pinned on it would be, maybe, just a tad more majestic? No. It's like the universe held a contest for the most average rock and Plymouth said, ‘Hold my sediment.’
“**Location, location, location?** More like disappointment, disappointment, disappointment. Nestled in what could be a scenic spot if it weren't for the overly dramatic cage around it. Yes, a cage, because apparently, this rock is a flight risk or, more likely, they're trying to keep the disappointment from spreading.
“**Historical significance?** Sure, if you consider a bunch of people stepping off a boat onto the first solid thing they saw, then yes, it's the Mount Everest of stepping stones. But let's be real, if Plymouth Rock were in my backyard, I'd use it for a doorstop and feel overly qualified for the job.
“**The ambiance** is something else. They've got this whole setup that screams, ‘We've got nothing else, but hey, look at this rock!’ There’s more excitement in watching paint dry. At least paint changes color over time; this rock has been the same shade of 'meh' for centuries.
**Interactive experience?** Oh, absolutely thrilling! You can stare at it. That’s it. No touching, no sitting, no inspirational speeches from the rock itself. I half expected it to at least whisper tales of yore or maybe start a stand-up comedy routine about pilgrims.
“**Value for money?** Well, it's free to look at, but I want a refund on my time. I've had more emotional connection with my toaster. At least that thing visibly contributes to my life by making breakfast.
“In conclusion, if you're compiling a bucket list, maybe put ‘seeing Plymouth Rock’ right below ‘organizing your sock drawer’ in terms of excitement. It's the geological equivalent of a placeholder; it's there because something has to be, not because it should be.
Would not recommend unless you're into the thrill of extreme underwhelm. However, if they ever decide to let people throw tomatoes at it for historical accuracy (since I'm sure the pilgrims were equally unimpressed), count me back in for a revisit!” – Google reviews, August 2024