“All the people here are DIPSHITS! I’m going to STEAL SOMEONE’S SEAT,” announced the woman behind us at Charlotte Ronson today. While crime is never the answer, we do sympathize. There seemed to be serious seating issues at the show: No one in our section could actually take their assigned place (rumor had it the seats had been filled prematurely with students), and we overheard actress Monet Mazur bitch to a friend that her seat had been changed “fifteen fucking times.” As perhaps you may have gleaned from the quote, she was not happy. Maybe Ronson’s PR girls just didn’t care for her studded cutoff-jean shorts and top hat.
We found the whole experience incredibly disappointing for other reasons, namely that Lindsay Lohan did not burst in at any point, screaming or otherwise. This was probably a huge relief to all the Ronsons in attendance — Mark, looking super-dapper in a blue-checked suit; half-sister Annabelle Dexter-Jones, who walked in the show (to great applause); Lindsay’s ex Sam, who D.J.’ed; and, of course, Charlotte herself — but personally, we’re sorry we didn’t get to witness the next chapter in the soapy saga that is Lindsay Lohan’s personal life.
Also a bummer: We hallucinated Kirsten Dunst in the front row, sitting next to a really cute boy and taking pictures on her iPhone. Yeah, that was just some blonde girl, which isn’t nearly as fun. Not to mention the fact that it’s way too early in Fashion Week for us to be having visions. Just a few seats down from Faux-Kiki, though, was the actual Nicky Hilton, wearing an acid-washed, sleeveless denim minidress and distractingly fake eyelashes. Although we overheard Nicky sighing to her seatmate Ally Hilfiger that she was “sooo jet-lagged,” Hilton the lesser managed to pull it together enough to give a reporter the juicy scoop about how she’s really over “hippie headbands.” Wonder how Nicky felt about that quote after Charlotte Ronson befitted each of her models with one — even though Ronson’s headbands were more Flashdance than Hair.
Nicky had a lot of visitors. Russell Simmons came over to say hello before returning to his seat with Keri Hilson — who looks seriously cuter at every show and always seems to be enjoying herself, which we appreciate in our celebrities. Nicky was also visited by a girl who looked so much like Olivia Palermo that we actually witnessed her turning to a photographer and snapping, “I’m NOT Olivia Palermo.” It must be hard to be constantly mistaken for someone so good-looking. We hate it when people think we are Gisele.
Speaking of socialites, we also spotted Tinsley Mortimer, whom we’ll never get used to seeing with perfectly straight, blown-out hair. We can’t imagine the Tinz would ever go out in one of Ronson’s pantless ensembles, even if she is revamping her image, but stranger things have happened. Also unlikely to embrace pantlessness — we hope — is 90210’s Jessica Stroup, who looked adorable (and healthy) in a patterned strapless dress. As pretty as she looked, Stroup seemed a little wistful during the show itself. Some might theorize that she was just concentrating on the clothes, but we’re pretty sure she was disappointed with the show’s glaring lack of Lindsay Lohan, too. We hear you, girl.
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`;
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}, {}];
window.modules["client.legacy"] = [function(require,module,exports){"use strict";require("cid.legacy"),require("ads.legacy"),require("facebook.legacy"),require("aaa-module-mounting.legacy");
}, {"cid.legacy":"cid.legacy","ads.legacy":"ads.legacy","facebook.legacy":"facebook.legacy","aaa-module-mounting.legacy":"aaa-module-mounting.legacy"}];
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}
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fn(el); // init the controller
} catch (e) {
const elementTag = el.outerHTML.slice(0, el.outerHTML.indexOf(el.innerHTML));
console.error(`Error initializing controller for "${name}" on "${elementTag}"`, e);
}
}
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*/
function mountComponentModules() {
Object.keys(window.modules).filter(key => typeof key === 'string' && key.match(/\.client$/)).forEach(key => {
let controllerFn = window.require(key);
if (typeof controllerFn === 'function') {
const name = key.replace('.client', ''),
instancesSelector = `[data-uri*="_components/${name}/"]`,
defaultSelector = `[data-uri$="_components${name}"]`,
instances = document.querySelectorAll(instancesSelector),
defaults = document.querySelectorAll(defaultSelector);
for (let el of instances) {
tryToMount(controllerFn, el, name);
}
for (let el of defaults) {
tryToMount(controllerFn, el, name);
}
}
});
}
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// services, or components that could require it
// note: the `` value is swapped for the actual environment variable in /lib/cmd/compile/scripts.js
window.process = window.process || {};
window.process.env = window.process.env || {};
if (!window.process.env.NODE_ENV) {
window.process.env.NODE_ENV = '';
}
// note: legacy controllers that require legacy services (e.g. dollar-slice) must
// wait for DOMContentLoaded to initialize themselves, as the files themselves must be mounted first
mountLegacyServices();
mountComponentModules();
// ]]