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The Slice: Fresh blooms? Hope for a miracle

Sun., May 3, 2015

By Paul Turner [email protected]

The problem with Bloomsday is there’s never a miracle upset.

The winner is always one of the imported elite runners.

There are multiple reasons for this. And there is nothing inherently unjust about it.

It’s just so, well, predictable.

Imagine if one year an unknown local runner bolted from the masses and zoomed to victory. Bloomsday would be reborn in our imaginations.

Sure, the event is much more than a race. For the vast majority of participants, the elite competition is irrelevant to that Sunday’s personal experience.

Still, think how exciting it would be if a North Side auto parts clerk or Post Falls dental hygienist sprinted across the finish line first.

Outta nowhere, as they say.

Reporters covering Bloomsday would have a fresh story to tell. Spokane would have an instant celebrity. And rumors about performance enhancing substances would fly.

Not going to happen, of course. Elite runners will always win.

As sportscaster Al Michaels famously asked, “Do you believe in miracles?”

No. Not really.

Just wondering: This is the week that Expo ’74 opened long ago.

So here’s the question. If you could have said something to Richard Nixon while he was in Spokane, what would it have been?

From last Sunday’s Slice: Lots of readers knew that a newel post is the large post at the top or bottom of a flight of stairs supporting the handrail.

I sent the coveted reporter’s notebook to Alan Howard of Rathdrum. It was not really a random selection. Howard, a longtime correspondent, said he has been trying to win a notebook for years. And declaring him the recipient was easier than putting 79 names in a hat. But thanks to all.

I also heard from quite a few folks already busy getting firewood. Some, like Jim Haunschild of Nine Mile Falls, try to stay several years ahead.

Another reader said that if you have not started by now, you’re not really serious about your firewood supply.

Today’s Slice question: If your pet’s DNA underwent testing, what do you suspect you would discover about the animal’s family tree?

Write The Slice at P. O. Box 2160, Spokane, WA 99210; call (509) 459-5470; email [email protected]. There are more than 300 Slice columns every year. Nothing says you have to like each one.