After Travis Kelce’s 2010s tweets made the rounds on X, it became crystal clear what Taylor Swift saw in the Kansas City athlete. It wasn’t just that he’s an NFL player, or has the build of a SMEG fridge, but for something altogether more ephemeral: He’s a Golden Retriever boyfriend.
TikTok defines a “Golden Retriever boyfriend†as a one who is trusting and kind, unashamed of his feelings, and, while a little naive, full of optimism and positivity that has nowhere to go but out and into the hearts of everyone who surrounds him. It’s the boyfriend searching worriedly for his partner at the airport (and lighting up when he sees her), the one who can’t wait for his significant other to get home, but also the one who needs constant stimulation, lest he drives his other half nuts. He’s also just one of five types of dog boyfriends.
Yes, like most TikTok trends, this one is niche and a little contrived. But if you’re curious where you fall on the dog continuum, see which of these descriptions most matches your vibe—or, if you’re a Golden Retriever, ask your partner and they’ll tell you. Good boy.
If you are a happy-go-lucky pogo stick who makes the best out of any bad situation, you are…a golden retriever boyfriend. You have big feelings and aren’t scared to share them, and have no problem with PDA. While you’re known for having a sometimes annoying amount of energy, if your partner is in distress, you’re steady as a rock. If there was one thing you could do better, it would be to just, please, not turn every little interaction into some kind of goofy joke.
If you have a hard exterior and hate everyone except for your partner, you are…a Rottweiler boyfriend. People annoy you, and you’re unavoidably standoffish in social situations. It’s a miracle that you managed to land a significant other at all, but you did, and it’s only with them that you drop your macho facade. Deep down, you’re a sweetie, but no one who ever saw you would guess—and that suits you just fine.
If you believe boyfriends should first and foremost be protectors, you are…a Doberman boyfriend. You’re strong and silent, because whenever you’re with your partner, you’re on the lookout for potential threats. You emit an honestly off-putting vibe when you’re out in public with your girlfriend, because this is a Dave and Buster’s and not an active war zone. Your partner’s friends have long since stopped throwing out cursory “And what about you?†in group conversations, because you’re there as a bodyguard, not a participant. Despite this, you don’t want to just stay at home, because your protectiveness stems from the pride you have in the partner on your arm.
If you see a bit of yourself in the Doberman boyfriend but maintain that you’re way too nice for that designation, you may be…a German Shepherd boyfriend. You’re sweet and loyal and get along with all your partner’s friends—but one wrong move and your whole demeanor changes. You can be aggressive when protection is needed, including calling your partner out on their own bullshit, and then curl up on the couch with them not five minutes later. You once bit my sister when she was four.
If your appearance is something of an acquired taste and you tend to lurk in the background at the events that you attend with your partner, you are…a Borzoi boyfriend. You’re lanky and aloof, and it’s not necessarily clear to other people what your partner sees in you. But clearly she’s responding to something in you, and what you lack in grace you make up for in manners. You’re respectful and intelligent, and turn heads whenever you lumber down the street.
While Golden Retriever might seem like the ideal comparison for both the boyfriend and the partner who lays claim to him, no one should be held to unrealistic standards. And girlfriends should remember that a Golden Retriever boyfriend isn’t just for Christmas. He’s for life.