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Q&A: Rachel Kim Raczka on The Big Day
The Big Day is The Boston Globe's new column about people's love stories and how they celebrate.
The Boston Globe launched a new column called The Big Day, which shares stories of how people fall in love and eventually have a celebration of some kind (usually a wedding).
The Big Day is about the path to love, as opposed to an expensive party … or the lineage of the parents of the couple in the spotlight.
It’s also the next logical step for our relationship features, by the way. Want to date? We’ve got Dinner With Cupid. Having trouble with the whole process? Send a letter to Love Letters. Then, somewhere in there, you might have a Big Day. Or two.
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Longtime Globe contributor Rachel Kim Raczka is at the helm of The Big Day, choosing couples who explain how they met, how the relationship got serious, and why they took next steps — sometimes in the form of a big wedding, or a very small City Hall one.
Raczka is an expert as she launches this feature. She got married in Ireland last year, and planned every tiny flourish, every place setting and guest experience. She even put out a newspaper during her weekend event — a cute handout that told guests about each other, and, more importantly, about the love story we were there to celebrate.
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I was there, and it was beautiful. (If we ever launch a column about bridesmaids, I can be the expert on that experience.)
Today I offer a conversation I had with Raczka about this new column, its motives, and how people can apply to get in.
Below is an abbreviated version of the conversation that was originally published in the Love Letters newsletter, which has been edited and condensed for clarity.
Who gets chosen to be in The Big Day — and what do you want people to get out of reading it?
We’re looking for a broad spectrum. Overall, I want people to have a clear idea of how they got there. You have these traditional milestones within a relationship, and they look a really specific way, but how you got there is the interesting part.
It’s not necessarily about the proposal, it’s not about the wedding day, it’s about all the steps that lead up to it. Knowing that these people went through challenges, or grew in certain ways, or overcame obstacles.
We’ve had couples who met in college and end up taking a break for a couple years. There are a lot more “second chance” romances than I thought there would be. I do wonder if that’s generational. There’s a lot of rekindling over COVID.
You bring up COVID. Does the idea of The Big Day feel more celebratory now post-pandemic?
I think so. I also think there is an element of people having the opportunity to look back in their own life and the people who [supported] the relationship. A lot of the time, when they’re going through their stories, they’re like, “Oh, so-and-so was here for that trip with us.” Or “this person introduced us.” I think this idea of the community that builds a couple is really interesting, and that’s something that gets celebrated in in-person weddings.
What advice would you give to couples who need to pass the finish line of this day?
Guests kind of take care of themselves. That’s the thing I learned. Guests are incredibly resourceful. If I get invited to a wedding, I know where to go. I have Google. I think couples — we try to predict everyone’s moves. In truth, so many people offered us help.
How do people read and apply to be in the column?
So there is an application on The Big Day site. It’s globe.com/TheBigDay. Couples only need to have one New England link; they don’t necessarily have to live here. The wedding doesn’t have to be here, but they could have gone to college here. One member could have grown up in the area. We would like to hear from you.
Apply or nominate someone to be featured in The Big Day.
Send your own relationship and dating questions to [email protected] or fill out this form. Catch new episodes of Meredith Goldstein’s “Love Letters” podcast at loveletters.show or wherever you listen to podcasts. Column and comments are edited and reprinted from boston.com/loveletters.
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