It’s Christmas day 2023 and the table is packed with steaming plates of juicy turkey, crispy roast potatoes, countless types of veggies and thick flavoursome gravy.
It smells incredible, my favourite meal of the year.
After saying grace, everyone tucks in and the dining room falls into a comfortable quiet, as people savour every bite.
My face drops as I look down at my plate. Three fish fingers and some slightly burnt chips stare back at me – that’s my Christmas dinner.
It wasn’t supposed to be like this but, as someone with coeliac disease, it’s not exactly a rare occurrence. I can’t have so much as a crumb of gluten, or even eat something that has touched the same surface as it.
If I do, my immune system will attack itself, damaging my gut. This can cause anything from bloating, pain, weight loss, and in the long run, nerve damage, bowel cancer, osteoporosis and ataxia.
So, when a family member accidentally put flour in the gravy to thicken it, and subsequently poured it over every single person’s plate before serving, it destroyed my chances of enjoying a Christmas dinner.
The frozen gluten free fish fingers and chips were all that could be whipped up on short notice.
I’m not alone in my struggle though. More than 5 million UK adults will likely miss out on Christmas dinner this year, due to their food intolerance or allergy being overlooked, according to YouGov.
If you’re rolling your eyes, you aren’t alone. The same study also found that nearly 4 million UK adults would purposely not invite someone to their Christmas celebrations if they had special dietary requirements.
But, if you are one of those people, I say this. You’re downright rude.
No, we aren’t being high maintenance. An allergy isn’t a lifestyle choice, it’s self preservation, and your lack of consideration quite frankly isn’t in the Christmas spirit.
God forbid you have to take a second out of your day to work out how to adapt some recipes or give your pots and pans an extra scrub.
And please don’t adopt the attitude Vanessa Feltz did this time last year. The broadcaster said on This Morning that not allowing gluten-containing foods into the house because someone was allergic to them was ‘completely unreasonable’.
Reality check Vanessa – it’s completely reasonable. Feltz did issue an apology but I urge you to make sure that’s not your attitude this Christmas.
I’m not saying catering for someone with an allergy is easy. It’s taken my parents years to get everything right and accidents still happen, but they make the effort.
I’ve been able to indulge in entirely gluten free roast dinners with gravy, stuffing and Yorkshire puddings – all of which would typically contain gluten. You just have to know how to cook it all.
Ask anyone with the allergy for advice or guidance and I guarantee they’ll be happy to help every step of the way.
While an allergy isn’t something that should cause tensions, you should be prepared for the fact that there could be an argument or two about it this festive period.
YouGov found that 12% of adults revealed their allergy or intolerance had caused an argument, and this figure jumped to 22% among 18-34-year-olds.
I remember once I came home from five weeks of travelling abroad, only to walk in the kitchen and be greeted with stony silence. Neither my mother or my step-father came to hug me, instead they were fuming because he had put Worcestershire sauce (which contains gluten) in the spaghetti bolognese.
An argument ensued, and I again sat and ate freezer food at my own welcome home meal, while everyone else enjoyed my favourite dish.
Like I said, accidents and arguments happen. This year I’m hoping that Christmas dinner is a possibility for me. Although with extra guests in attendance, it makes the whole process riskier.
People who aren’t as familiar with my allergy may contaminate food by using the wrong serving spoons, or by touching gluten on their plate and then putting that spoon back in the bowl.
They might accidentally drink out of my wine glass after eating gluten, contaminating my drink. There’s no shortage of opportunities for things to become inedible for me.
But this year I’ll take comfort in the fact that everyone will try their best. This is unlike the various people in my life who get me the same Easter egg (which tastes awful) every year because they ‘don’t have time’ to read the ingredients on the back.
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This is unlike the people who tell me to ‘just have a bite’ and that I’m ‘just being dramatic’ – which is infuriating, by the way.
So, don’t be a Grinch this Christmas. Invite that loved one with an allergy, ask them for pointers and help on what to cook and how to cook it, ask them to get stuck in and help with Christmas dinner – I guarantee they’ll be grateful for it.
No one should be left out at the most wonderful time of the year.
This article was originally published December 10, 2024
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