• The Blue Lagoon

    The Blue Lagoon

    ★★

    sexualized minors + some subtle blackface + sweet home Alabama = The Blue Lagoon (1980) 🤧

  • Bruce Almighty

    Bruce Almighty

    ★★★

    Jim Carrey has no right looking so good in button up shirts

  • An Extremely Goofy Movie

    An Extremely Goofy Movie

    ★★★

    the origin of my daddy kink

  • The Little Mermaid

    The Little Mermaid

    ★★★

    that dumbass really sacrificed herself for some Lord Farquaad lookin ass prince 😔😔

  • Once Upon a Time in America

    Once Upon a Time in America

    ★½

    the score: you would be NOTHING without me!
    the movie: 👁👄👁 

    Much like my experience with The Untouchables, I was expecting a compelling mob movie that features De Niro as one of the main characters, but instead I was bored as hell. I just didn’t find anything to really latch onto? The characters were bland, Noodles (hilarious that THAT’S the name he went with, like who’s gonna tell him? 👀) was VERYYY uninteresting as a protagonist/ antihero, and the actual…

  • Léon Morin, Priest

    Léon Morin, Priest

    ★★★★½

    the ONE TIME I wanna see a scandal happen in the church

  • Neymar: The Perfect Chaos

    Neymar: The Perfect Chaos

    ★★★

    that painting of him as Batman and Joker is either the hardest shit ever or the most middle school kid who wears heelies shit ever

  • The Shape of Things

    The Shape of Things

    ★★★★

    ... girl I hate men too but you gotta admit that was a bit much 💆🏻‍♀️

  • Space Chimps

    Space Chimps

    ★½

    Kilowatt literally looks like a titty

  • The Lord of the Rings

    The Lord of the Rings

    ★★½

    “we have Lord of the Rings at home”
    Lord of the Rings at home:

  • The Cook

    The Cook

    ★★★

    that one clip of Keaton that makes all the girls go awooGGAAAAA 🐺🔊😍

  • Mississippi Burning

    Mississippi Burning

    ★★★★

    I literally had to pause the movie and try to breathe when I saw Willem Dafoe wOWZA

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