Through laughter and tears, Livonia women's book club has stuck together for 20 years

LIVONIA - The first rule of the Boa Book Club is that they talk about the club and everybody in it, and maybe the book, too.

The Boa Book Club recently turned the page on two decades together - a remarkable success story of 14 women who have shared more than 200 books and so much more.

“For us, the success comes from getting to know each other so well, so intimately,” Vicky Opie said. “We have spent 20 years sharing our lives and I think there is something really magical about that.”

“Book club means absolute friendship,” Johanna Lafferty said. “We’ve seen each other at our highest and lowest moments.”

They have found common ground and echoes of their own lives in the books they have shared - including books they have all loved, one book they all hated, one book that piqued the interest of their husbands, books that have made them laugh, sparked their appetites and helped them cope with unexpected turns in life.

Boas born from moms seeking more

After the passage of more than two decades, the beginnings of the Boa Book Club are a little hazy - but Patty Martin, Opie and Lafferty, all original members, agree that it was born out of a Livonia Rosedale Gardens neighborhood play group that was reaching its end as kids went off to kindergarten.

“We needed something more than being moms and to break up monotonous days,” Lafferty said. “We thought, what can we do to use our brain, have conversations and get out of the house?”

Opie said they read “The Red Tent” and “The Girl With the Pearl Earring” before the six original members decided to each invite one guest to join them in the new book club venture. In early 2004, a dozen women held their first evening meeting, when the kids were in bed and their “husbands couldn’t give them flak,” and discussed their first “official” book: “The Girls’ Guide to Hunting and Fishing.”

At that first meeting, they also discussed what they should call themselves. Opie recalls they settled on the “Boa Book Club” because they felt that once a month, they could come together as “confident, happy, real women - dropping their boas at the door.” They could then laugh, cry, and joke together, and leave feeling restored and stronger than when they arrived.

Lafferty remembers that as mothers of young kids, the women were striving to keep multiple facets of themselves intact.

“We were trying to figure out if we still had any sexual appeal - can we be that and be changing diapers? Can we have a boa and be a diva, all with throw-up on our shoulders?”

Interesting cast of characters, dialogue

The women, who were then mostly in their 30s and now range from about 50- to 65-years-old, are wives and mothers, but so much more. They are well-educated professionals, among them a nurse, a writer, a staff member of the U.S. Olympic and Paralympic Committee, and the mayor of Livonia. Lafferty is one of four teachers in the group; Martin is a pharmacist; and Opie is a promotions director for WMUZ-FM, a contemporary Christian music station in Detroit.

They hold various political and religious beliefs, but they don’t shy away from these topics in their book choices, and their discussions are respectful, if not always in agreement.

Their meetings are rotated mostly among each other’s homes (though occasionally involve a field trip to see a movie or play based on the book, or to meet an author). Most club members still live in Livonia, although a few hail from Northville, Farmington Hills and Brighton. One even moved to Connecticut, but still participates long-distance via Zoom.

The hostess picks the book, and every fourth Thursday of the month, at least eight members show up, bearing appetizers and ready to talk - about the book and life.

The Boa Book Club ladies enjoy some good appetizers, and maybe a cocktail or two to lift their spirits.

“It’s always nice to have a little bubbly, champagne or a mimosa - it can be in a can, we’re not picky,” Martin said, laughing.

They love a good theme and often choose menus, décor and even background music and their attire based around the book they are reading.

There was the time they all wore red to book club when they read “The Night Circus,” and the memorable occasion when they donned rhinestone-studded sunglasses and made southern foods and margaritas and mint Juleps for their discussion about “The Sweet Potato Queen’s Book of Love.” The book includes chapters on “What to eat when tragedy strikes, or just for entertainment" as well as “Men Who May Need Killing, Quite Frankly.”

Their husbands mixed some drinks for that book discussion and they found another book their wives read which stirred their interest even more: - “How to Make Love Like a Porn Star.”

“Our husbands were excited, they thought they were gonna get porn stars at the end of the book,” Martin said.  

Jenna Jameson’s memoir, packed with pictures, inspired some spicy conversation and the club’s meeting that month featured some interestingly shaped cookies and candies. After the Boas finished the book, they sent all their copies to soldiers overseas in care packages, which were very well-received.

The real-life plot - comedy, tragedy, romance, drama

Their taste in books varies as much as the food they bring to club meetings.

Martin notes she has a penchant for books that make a statement, like “Under the Banner of Heaven,” by Jon Krakauer, or more recently, “The Women,” by Kristin Hannah. She admits her friends have told her that her books can be difficult to read.

The club has also gone through a “dark period” when they were reading sad, although “impactful” books like “I Know This Much is True,” by Wally Lamb, and also a classics period, which could have fit the same category, including Steinbeck masterpieces “East of Eden” and “Grapes of Wrath.”

“They’d say they love Steinbeck, and I’d say, ‘He gets a little deep sometimes,’” Lafferty said, adding with a laugh, “I’m like, ‘Can we get a book with sex to hold my attention?’”

While she likes some spicy reading, the teacher has also chosen award-winning children’s and young adult fiction, including “The Giver” by Lowry and “The Book Thief” by Zusak.

The book club members recognize that life gets busy and know that not everyone may read the chosen book every month. They know too, that sometimes they may need to change a book to fit the needs of one of their own.

Never was that more evident than when a husband of one of the Boas died suddenly.

They changed their scheduled book to “Option B: Facing Adversity, Building Resilience, and Finding Joy,” by Sheryl Sandberg, and the meeting that month ended at 1:30 a.m., filled with more hugs, tears, and talk far beyond the book.  

“If something is going on in someone’s life, that takes precedent,” Lafferty says simply. “We can change on a dime for what we need to do for our members.”

These women have been there to hold each other’s hands through all of life’s sorrows, including divorce, illness, and aging parents suffering from Alzheimer’s.

They have found comfort in each other’s friendship and in their books, a common touchstone.

Not the end, just an intriguing next chapter

Last month, they gathered at Flyleaf, a bookstore in Grosse Pointe, to celebrate their 20 years together, each woman bringing her favorite book. Among them were “A Prayer for Owen Meany” and “Daisy Jones and the Six,” and slipped in among the winners as a joke was one stinker they all hated - “The Red Bird of Christmas,” which Lafferty calls “a Hallmark movie times a million.”

But even a disliked book or a book they don’t all agree on makes for a fun discussion.

Twenty years later, with the nests empty, menopause upon them, grandchildren arriving and retirement looming, they are reliving the memories and looking forward to the next chapter of a beautiful sisterhood.

“Being able to read a variety of books together and to honestly share how we feel about a book and how that is applicable to our lives, and be open and honest and vulnerable and real has kept us together,” Opie said. “We are still loving each other’s stories and loving each other through it.”

Contact reporter Susan Bromley at [email protected]