Giant Steps | Ep. 257

Do you know what it means to “put your best foot forward”?

It could mean you present yourself in a positive way, so that you make a good impression. It could also mean you try your hardest to do something difficult.

In this week’s story, we meet a character whose life depends on “putting his best foot forward” – but only if he can keep someone else's foot off the ground!

Our tale is called “Giant Steps.” We found versions of this story from the Jewish community in the southwestern Asian nation of Iraq.

This episode was the first of two we recorded before a live audience of energetic kids and grown-ups at The Athenaeum Center for Thought and Culture in Chicago, Illinois. Joining host Rebecca Sheir on stage was a trio of Chicago-based actors: James Konicek, Kayla Pulley, and Terrance Lamonte, Jr. And playing live music on the timpani (learn more about these enormous kettledrums below) was Eric Shimelonis.

This episode was adapted for Circle Round by Rebecca Sheir. It was edited by Dean Russell. Original music and sound design is by Eric Shimelonis. Our artist is Sabina Hahn.

GROWN-UPS! PRINT THIS so everyone can color while listening. We’re also keeping an album so please share your picture on Facebook and Instagram, and tag it with #CircleRoundPodcast. To access all the coloring pages for past episodes click HERE. Our resident artist is Sabina Hahn and you can learn more about her HERE.

Now It’s Your Turn

You can “put your best foot forward” by making your own Fancy Footprint!

First, find some paper and trace the outline of your foot; your shoe can be on or off.

Next, grab some art supplies and turn your footprint into something new. It could be an object or creature, real or imagined, or you can just decorate your footprint and make it fancy!

Once you’re done with your Fancy Footprint, we’d love to see it! Ask a grown-up to snap a photo of you and your creation and email it to [email protected]. We may feature it in The Lion’s Roar, the monthly letter for fabulously fancy members of the Circle Round Club. Learn more and sign up today here!

Musical Spotlight: Timpani

The timpani (also known as the kettledrums) are likely some of the biggest drums you’ll ever see: a single timpano can weigh up to 140 pounds!

Today’s timpani players (or timpanists) use several drums of various sizes, all tuned to different pitches, from lower to higher. They play the drums with a special stick called a “timpani mallet.”

Eric Shimelonis chose the timpani to underscore this story because of their massive size – just like the giants whom the woodcutter encounters in his adventures!

You can also hear Eric Shimelonis playing the timpani in one of our early Circle Round stories, “The Tug of War.”

Script:

NARRATOR: There once lived a woodcutter with nothing more to his name than his tumbledown cottage, his trusty ax, and his pet goat, Petunia: a gentle, playful animal on whom the woodcutter relied for milk and cheese.

He also relied on Petunia for company, and brought her to work each day, so she could graze grass in the forest while he chopped wood.

One morning, as the woodcutter was chopping and Petunia was grazing, what should come swooping down through the trees… but a buzzard! The broad-winged, sharp-taloned bird of prey was clearly hunting some furry critter or another: a mouse, perhaps, or a rabbit.

Thing is, poor Petunia was certain the buzzard was hunting HER! She lifted her head, let out a bleat…

PETUNIA: (BLEAT!)

NARRATOR: …then went scampering away!

WOODCUTTER: Petunia! Where are you going, Petunia? Turn around and get back here!

NARRATOR: The terrified goat paid no heed. Instead of turning around, she just disappeared into the dense and tangled trees.

WOODCUTTER: Oh no! My dear friend! (realizing) And my dear food! If I don't get Petunia back, I'll have no cheese to eat! And no milk to drink!

NARRATOR: The woodcutter tossed down his ax and took off through the forest. He tore through brambles…

WOODCUTTER: Petunia!

NARRATOR: …he splashed across streams…

WOODCUTTER: Petunia!

NARRATOR: …he leaped over logs…

WOODCUTTER: Petunia!

NARRATOR: …but it was no use. His beloved goat was lost. And so, he realized, was he!

WOODCUTTER: Oh dear. I have no idea where I am right now. Or which way I must go to get back to my cottage! Did I come running from THIS way…? Or THAT way?

NARRATOR: The woodcutter meandered around, keeping his eyes peeled for a familiar landmark… but nothing was recognizable.

Eventually, he found himself at the forest’s edge. The moment he stepped into the open air, an extraordinary sight met his eyes. Stretched out before him were row upon row of blueberry bushes. But they were unlike any blueberry bushes he had ever seen.

WOODCUTTER: Check out how HUGE these bushes are! They’re easily twice my height! And their berries are the size of my head!

NARRATOR: Beyond the super-sized bushes was a super-sized house. The door was bigger than the woodcutter’s entire cottage, and the roof and chimney towered over the treetops.

WOODCUTTER: Who could possibly live in a house this giant? And grow blueberries this giant? If I didn’t know better, I’d say it had to be a… (gets interrupted)

GIANTESS: (finishing Woodcutter’s sentence) …a GIANT? (beat) Or, in MY case, a giant-ESS?

NARRATOR: The woodcutter spun around. Striding toward him on legs like tree trunks was, yes, a giantess. Her fingers were the size of bread loaves, and before he knew what was happening, she was wrapping those fingers around his body and lifting him into the air!

GIANTESS: Keep still, human. And keep quiet. You’re coming with me!

NARRATOR: The woodcutter quivered like a leaf as the giantess carried him into the house. She locked the door, then set him down on a table so long and wide, he could have played tennis on it… if his trembling hands could hold on to a racket.

GIANTESS: Okay human. You’d better explain yourself. What are you doing here?

NARRATOR: The woodcutter felt his throat go dry.

WOODCUTTER: (nervous) Ummm… well…? The truth is… I don’t know WHAT I’m doing here! I lost my goat… And then I lost my way… And now, I just want to go HOME. (beat) Though I suppose that’s out of the question. Given that you’re going to EAT me and all.

GIANTESS: EAT you????

NARRATOR: The giantess arched an eyebrow.

GIANTESS: You think I’m going to EAT you????

WOODCUTTER: Well… yes! Don’t giants eat humans?

GIANTESS: You BET they do! If a giant comes across a human like you, you will be TOAST. (beat) (lightening up) Or you’ll be ON toast. (beat) Maybe BETWEEN TWO PIECES of toast? Like a sandwich? (beat) Or in YOUR case… a MAN-wich? (laughter)

NARRATOR: The giantess bellowed with laughter. The trembling woodcutter didn’t have the heart, or stomach, to join in.

GIANTESS: What, you didn’t like that joke? How about THIS one then??? Giants love eating humans so much, they’re practically “HUMAN-itarians”! (laugh) Get it??? Like a “VEG-etarian”??? Only it’s “HUMAN-itarian”??? Because they snarf down so many humans!?? (laugh) Still no laugh, huh? Not even a smile. Do you not find my jokes funny????

WOODCUTTER: It’s just… well, I think I’m the wrong audience for your humor. Ya know? I’m not your ideal crowd. And besides, how can I possibly laugh when I’m about to be somebody’s lunch?

GIANTESS: Somebody’s lunch? Oh. No way. Not lunch. Lunch was hours ago. You’d be somebody’s dinner! (laugh) (sobering up) Lucky for you, you won't be MINE.

NARRATOR: The woodcutter felt a surge of relief… and confusion.

WOODCUTTER: But I thought you said giants are “human-itarians”!

GIANTESS: They are! But not ME. I gave up eating your kind years back, when my doctor told me my cholesterol was too high. It was “through the roof,” she said. And look at my house! You can see how high the roof is! (laugh) So anyway. She put me on this plant-based diet. No milk… No eggs… No humans. (beat) And you know what?

WOODCUTTER: What?

GIANTESS: I don't miss it! In fact, I’ve come to believe eating humans is downright BARBARIC. Just the THOUGHT of popping a person down my gullet makes me queasy!

WOODCUTTER: Makes ME queasy, too!

GIANTESS: But listen. My dietary habits are definitely the exception to the giant rule. Especially in this house. I share the place with my big brother. And when I say “big,” I mean BIG. You could fit a kiddie pool inside his stomach. And he guzzles down humans like there’s no tomorrow!

WOODCUTTER: Well… I guess for the humans, there IS no tomorrow!

GIANTESS: (laugh) Ha! So you DO make jokes. I like a human with a sense of humor. …Almost as much as my brother likes a human with a side of fries! (beat) Luckily, my savage sibling is out for the day. Which means we have plenty of time to get you out of here and –

GIANT: (calling through door) Sister? Sister! Are you home? The door is locked!

NARRATOR: The giantess froze. As did the woodcutter’s blood.

WOODCUTTER: (nervous stage whisper) I thought you said your brother was out for the day!

GIANTESS: (nervous stage whisper) He WAS! He must be back early! (beat) But don’t worry. I have a plan. (beat) (dramatic) And if it works… I promise. YOU will FIND your way home… and my BROTHER will LOSE his appetite!

[live score out]

[theme music in]

NARRATOR: What do you think the giantess has up her very long sleeve?

And will the woodcutter make it home…? Or become dinner?

We’ll find out, after a quick break.

[BREAK]

NARRATOR: I’m Rebecca Sheir and welcome back to Circle Round, live at The Athenaeum Center for Thought and Culture in Chicago, Illinois! Today our story is called “Giant Steps.”

Before the break, a woodcutter lost his goat… and his way… before finding… a giantess. To his relief, the giantess was kind… good-natured… and, most importantly, vegetarian.

So when her HUMAN-itarian brother showed up unexpectedly, the giantess devised a plan.

GIANTESS: Listen, human. I’m going to take you to my brother’s room. You’re going to hide beneath his bed. And when he falls asleep tonight, you’re going to steal one of his shoes. 

WOODCUTTER: Steal one of his shoes???? Why would I steal one of his shoes?

GIANTESS: Because they’re MAGIC! If my brother isn’t wearing his magic shoes… and he tries to stand up… he’ll sink right into the ground! He’s so gargantuan that the earth isn’t strong enough to support him. (beat) So if you hide one of his shoes, he’ll promise you ANYTHING to get it back. And he knows he has to KEEP that promise.

WOODCUTTER: How come?

GIANTESS: Because it’s part of the magic spell. One broken promise and BOOM! The magic of my brother’s shoes will be lost forever. (beat) But enough chit-chat; let’s get you out of this kitchen!

NARRATOR: The giantess scooped up the woodcutter and carried him to her brother’s room. Then she went back to the front door and swung it open.

GIANT: Sister! What took you so long? And why did you lock the door? We NEVER lock the door!

GIANTESS: (hedging, stalling) Yeah… I guess we don't, do we. But I was, uh, I was just putting something away. (beat) Anyhow… What brings you home so early?

GIANT: I thought I’d surprise you, sis! Figured we could have dinner together. I’d go hunt down some HUMANS and we could have ourselves a feast!

GIANTESS: How many times do I have to remind you, brother? I’m a vegetarian. I don’t eat humans.

GIANT: Right right right. You don’t eat humans. So how about a nice, steamy human SOUP? THAT counts as vegetarian, right?

GIANTESS: Wrong.

GIANT: Human JELLY?

GIANTESS: Wrong again.

GIANT: What about little humans?

GIANTESS: You mean children? No way!!!

GIANT: Oh come on, sis! Don't you remember how tasty humans are? They’re so succulent! So flavorful! And what a scrumptious aroma! Why, I can practically smell one right now! (sniffs) Actually… I CAN smell one right now! Is there a human in this house????

GIANTESS: A human??? In this house???? How could a human possibly find their way into this house? You must be really hungry if you're smelling humans.

GIANT: Hmm. You’re right. I AM hungry. TOO hungry to go out and do any hunting right now. Do we have anything in the kitchen?

GIANTESS: Actually, YES! We have an entire coop of bony, gristly CHICKENS for YOU... and veggie fried rice with pineapple and tangy marinated TOFU for ME! 

NARRATOR: After the siblings polished off their dinners, the giant went lumbering to his room. From the woodcutter’s position beneath the bed, he immediately understood what the giantess meant when she said her big brother was big! The giant was twice as tall as his sister…and twice as wide.

Plopping his behemoth behind on the mattress, the giant kicked off his magic shoes. Then he stretched his bulky body beneath the covers, and fell asleep.

GIANT: (ad-lib BIG SNORES!)

NARRATOR: The woodcutter waited a few minutes. Then he crawled over to one of the magic shoes. It was bigger than a trampoline, but lighter than he expected, and he scooted it down the hallway with ease. But the moment he reached the front door…

WOODCUTTER: Oh no!

NARRATOR: … his heart sank.

WOODCUTTER: The door handle! It’s too high for me to reach! I was going to hide the shoe outside, but how could I possibly – (cuts himself off) What was that?

NARRATOR: The woodcutter’s body tensed as plodding footsteps came thundering down the hall. But then…

GIANTESS: (stage whisper) Human!

NARRATOR: … he heaved a sigh of relief.

WOODCUTTER: Giantess! It’s you! I thought your brother had woken up!

GIANTESS: Nope! Didn't you hear him? That guy snores like an EARTHQUAKE. And he could SLEEP through one! (beat) I figured you’d need some help. Climb inside the shoe.

NARRATOR: The woodcutter did as he was told. The giantess grabbed the shoe, opened the door, then marched to a massive mound of dirt by the blueberry bushes. She set the shoe down and handed the woodcutter a spoon. Though to him, it looked more like a shovel!

GIANTESS: If you dig deep enough in this mound of dirt, it could be the perfect place to hide my brother’s shoe. I would help, but I should get back inside. Just in case my earthquake of a brother wakes up.

WOODCUTTER: Thank you, Giantess! I’m so grateful. For everything!

GIANTESS: You’re welcome! (beat) I have to tell you... it feels heaps better HELPING a human, than having a heaping HELPING of human! (laugh) Get it? A heaping helping? Like, a generous portion? …Of human?

WOODCUTTER: Yeah. I get it. But again. Wrong audience.

GIANTESS: Right. (beat) I’d better go. Good luck!

NARRATOR: The woodcutter waved his new friend goodbye, then climbed out of the shoe and began to dig. It was hard work, and for a moment he was tempted to fling his shovel aside and make a break for it. But with no idea how to get home through the dark, dense forest… or what frightening creatures awaited him there… he kept on digging.

He dug and he dug, making the hole deeper, and wider, until he was able to bury the shoe. By the time he was finished, the sun was rising. And inside the humongous house, the giant was rising, too!

GIANT: (big yawn, stretch, etc.)

NARRATOR: The first thing he did was sit on the edge of his bed and reach for his magic shoes. But to his alarm…

GIANT: … one of my shoes is MISSING!!! (beat) Sister? Sister!

GIANTESS: Yes?

NARRATOR: The giantess concealed a smile as she popped her head in the door.

GIANT: I can’t find my other shoe!!!! Have you seen my other shoe?????

GIANTESS: Your other shoe…?

NARRATOR: The giantess pretended to think.

GIANTESS: Hmmm. Didn’t you leave it under the bed last night? As you always do?

GIANT: I THOUGHT I did! But it isn’t here! I must find that shoe!!!

NARRATOR: The flustered giant stuck one foot into his one shoe and went hopping around the room.

GIANT: Where is it???

NARRATOR: Then he went hopping around the house.

GIANT: Where IS it???

NARRATOR: Then he went hopping around the yard.

GIANT: WHERE IS IT????? (beat) I would DO ANYTHING to have my shoe back!!!

WOODCUTTER: “You would do ANYTHING”...???????

NARRATOR: At the sight of the woodcutter, the giant’s eyes grew wider than dinner plates.

GIANT: Why yes! I would do ANYTHING! (beat) After gobbling you up for breakfast, of course!

WOODCUTTER: Oh I wouldn’t do that if I were you… Because I know where your shoe is! But I won't take you to it unless you make me a PROMISE. (beat) THREE promises, actually.

GIANT: Three promises…?

WOODCUTTER: Yes! And I know you have to KEEP those three promises if you want your magic shoes to work. (beat) So first: you must promise to help me get home.

NARRATOR: The giant paused, then gave his colossal shoulders a shrug.

GIANT: (huffy) Fine. Sure. I’ll help you get home. (beat) But all that traveling is bound to make me hungry. Even HUNGRIER than I already AM! And you look like a very tasty morsel!

WOODCUTTER: And that’s where the SECOND promise comes in! You must promise… that you won’t eat me.

GIANT: Won’t eat you…? Alright! I promise I won’t eat you. (beat) Instead, I’ll chow down on your NEIGHBORS!

WOODCUTTER: Uh uh uh!

NARRATOR: The woodcutter wagged his finger.

WOODCUTTER: I haven't told you the THIRD promise yet. The THIRD promise is that you don’t eat ANYONE! Ever again! Humans will be off the menu!

GIANT: Soooo… When you say humans are “off the menu”... how about a human SMOOTHIE?

WOODCUTTER: No!

GIANT: Human JUICE?

WOODCUTTER: Still no!

GIANT: Human JERKY? My sister just bought this new food dehydrator to make kale chips or whatever – (gets cut off)

WOODCUTTER: Absolutely NOT!

GIANT: (sigh) Okay. Fine. I won’t eat humans. Ever again.

WOODCUTTER: Promise?

GIANT: Promise!

NARRATOR: The woodcutter and giant got to work unearthing the shoe – which was no small feat, considering that the giant was still balancing on one foot! Once he had both shoes on and both feet back on the ground, he perched the woodcutter on his shoulder. Then together they set out through the forest.

Thanks to the giant's eagle-eye view, the woodcutter had no problem navigating the way to his tumbledown cottage, where… to his relief and delight… his beloved goat Petunia was waiting.

PETUNIA: (bleat!)

NARRATOR: The giant bade the woodcutter farewell, then headed back into the forest. And as he did, he had a spring in his step and a smile on his face.

You see, the giant had never done a good deed before. And now that he had his first taste of kindness, he discovered it was downright delicious.