All the FMLs

Pipe down

By Anonymous - 15/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my husband is threatening divorce because I loudly objected at his daughter's wedding and made a scene. His daughter is 19 and got married to a 40-year-old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21

You deserved it 42

Let me in!

By Anonymous - 15/05/2026 14:00 - United States - Centreville

Today, I went out on the porch to smoke a cigarette and then my two year-old son locked me out. I didn't have my cellphone so while I was waiting for my husband to get home, he pooped, smeared his poop all over the floor and glass door, then tried to "mop it." It was literally a shit show. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28

You deserved it 71

Great session! Same time next week!

By Sabre777 - This FML is from back in 2019 but it's good stuff

Today, while as a therapist, a client made an audible fart and pointed out that she had done so. Shortly after, she wrinkled her nose as she savored the odor. She began to discuss her significant trauma issues. Before I could respond, her fart wafted over to me, making any mature response pointless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 671

You deserved it 180

Anger management classes going well?

By Fuckrs - 15/05/2026 09:00 - United States - Secaucus

Today, not only did my deadbeat brother mooch off me for six months, wreck my car, and screw my wife, he just successfully sued me for the medical bills he incurred when I caught them and beat him within an inch of his life. Twelve fucking grand in debt. I should have just stabbed him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 180

You deserved it 62

Late bloomer

By T_T - 15/05/2026 12:30 - India - Kanakapura

Today, a sixth grader complained to me about her emotionally cheating ex and her current boyfriend. I haven't had a single partner yet. A 12 year-old has a VERY EXISTENT and better love life than I do. When I said this to her she said "Well, at least your parents love you." They didn't. I need therapy. And a life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 171

You deserved it 57

Foreshadowing

By CaptainSosuke - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I tripped over my own shoelace after explaining to my boyfriend that my shoes being untied were good luck for me. He then took that as the grand opportunity to tell me that we were breaking up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 009

You deserved it 8 593

Dreams

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 19:00 - United States - Boise

Today, I woke up from a dream where I was talking with my Pa, who raised me, about my life. He and I drank coffee and talked and he told me everything will be OK. I will never talk with him again; he passed almost 59 years ago and I never got to say goodbye or tell him how much I loved him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 241

You deserved it 44

Zonked out

By Anonymous - 15/05/2026 01:00 - Finland - Helsinki

Today, I got my ass kicked by my boss at work. Why? Because I missed my shift on Saturday, because I slept through my alarms and the phone calls from my co-workers, and I woke up three hours later in a state of panic. This is all because of a medicine I'm on for migraines. FML

I agree, your life sucks 222

You deserved it 69

Nailed it

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 13:00 - United States

Today, after my husband yelled at me for wasting money by getting my nails done, I decided to buy the supplies and watch YouTube to figure out how to do them myself. He then yelled at me for wasting money on the supplies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 238

You deserved it 104

Suspicious activity

By Loss prevention - 14/05/2026 14:00 - United States - Virginia Beach

Today, I caught a dude acting suspicious in the self checkout at Target and took him to the Loss Prevention office. Turns out he'd paid for everything, and he turned into such a Karen at being "wrongly detained" that I ended up giving him a gift card just to get rid of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64

You deserved it 478

Stuck with it

By juice723 - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Marblehead

Today, my friends started calling me "Soberman" because I recently gave up alcohol and have a Doberman. Normally, I wouldn't mind the nickname, but they call me Soberman everywhere. My new boss now thinks it's because I AM an alcoholic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 652

You deserved it 3 234

Who even are you?

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 08:00 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend didn't have a son that died in a car accident. He's never even had any kids. FML

I agree, your life sucks 339

You deserved it 46

Weird anniversary mood but OK

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 05:00 - United States - Northport

Today, it was me and my wife's anniversary. I spent it consoling her as she cried over a man she loved 20 years ago. They never even dated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 69

Enjoy yourself, it's later than you think

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 08:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my moms are driving me mad. My biological mom, a therapist, keeps telling me I need to try new things because life is short. My non-biological mom, a doctor, keeps telling me everything new I want to try has health risks that will shorten my life even further. FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 54

The butter up

By brokenhearted - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - Ireland - Dublin

Today, my boyfriend sent me so many nice texts that he made me fall in love with him that little bit more. It turns out he was sweetening me up before telling me he cheated on me the night before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 488

You deserved it 2 661

Won't You Be My Neighbor?

By Mike - 14/05/2026 03:00 - Norway - Oppdal

Today, after months of peace and quiet since January, a new family moved into the apartment below me ten minutes before I was about to go to sleep. They've been here for 30 minutes and already they're stomping and banging doors all over the place. FML

I agree, your life sucks 251

You deserved it 71

Cashier 4U

By Anonymous - 14/05/2026 00:00 - United States

Today, at a busy register, I greeted a customer, started scanning items, and only halfway through realized they were on their phone with earbuds in and had not actually been talking to me. I got flustered, scanned the same item twice, and had to call over a manager while the line behind them got longer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 234

You deserved it 105

Knock out

By don't rub it in bitch - 13/05/2026 16:00 - Canada - Montreal

Today, I saw a friend from college, who I'd cut ties with after her much older boyfriend convinced her to drop out of college and marry him. She looks amazing and has two beautiful kids, while I'm a struggling obese single mom. She said, "The hoe phase really worked out for you, I see." FML

I agree, your life sucks 145

You deserved it 402

Love is…

By manderz? - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United States - Beach Haven

Today, after having an amazing first date with my long time crush, we ended up going out to dinner. We shared a meal, and it was delicious! This would have been the ultimate dream come true... Except for the part about me throwing up in his car on the way back home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 762

You deserved it 1 171

Consolation Prize

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, a guy who I was low-key crushing on asked me out. I excitedly told my best friend, as I do when I have big news. She informed me that the same guy asked her out 15 minutes ago. He'd originally been into her and only came to me because she rejected him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 363

You deserved it 67

Genius, huh?

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 12:00 - Australia

Today, after pulling an all-nighter on an essay, I submitted it one minute before the deadline and felt like a genius. Later, I reopened the file and discovered I'd uploaded the rough draft instead of the final version. The last line ended with “fix this later,” which was not my finest academic work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 121

You deserved it 295

Mother's Day is sacred

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 02:00 - United States

Today, I woke up to a note from my wife, saying that since I spent Father's Day golfing, she booked herself a spa day, so I could take care of our 4 kids and the house like she does every day. She ignored every single one of my calls and didn't even tell me what spa she went to. What mother does that to her family? FML

I agree, your life sucks 93

You deserved it 1 312

Trippin'

By tammyg - This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I took Ambien for the first time. Not only did I not fall asleep, but I took my mother through a list of all the men I've slept with. I do not remember a thing, but apparently I was very thorough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 737

You deserved it 6 378

Don't give up

By Anonymous - 12/05/2026 20:00 - United States

Today, I told my husband that I didn't think our marriage was going to survive our stillbirth, and that we should get divorced. He said, "No way. We're going to marriage and grief counseling and not giving up on our marriage." He just doesn't understand that I blame myself so much and want to set him free. FML

I agree, your life sucks 324

You deserved it 274

Wonky birthday!

By Anonymous - 13/05/2026 00:00 - United Kingdom - Bournemouth

Today, halfway through assembling a toy kitchen for a birthday, I realized the instructions made no sense and half the screws looked identical. I still somehow finished it and felt triumphant until the kid opened the oven door, the whole thing tipped sideways, and I had to spend the rest of the party holding it together with one hand. FML

I agree, your life sucks 130

You deserved it 278

At this point, it's an addiction

By Anonymous - 12/05/2026 15:00 - United States

Today, my mom told me that she never wants to see me again because my family and I did not attend her wedding, which she wanted my youngest to be a flower girl to. I refused because this is her eighth marriage (that's right, 8) and she never learns. FML

I agree, your life sucks 366

You deserved it 69

Breaking news

By helenablitz - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I found out my boyfriend of two years has children. Not one, not two, but three. Not with one, two, but three women. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 411

You deserved it 5 181

Fungus

By Yak - 12/05/2026 09:00 - United States

Today, I walked in the bathroom and smelled a disgusting cheesy smell. I looked at the tub and my boyfriend was furiously scrubbing under his toenails with a nail brush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 267

You deserved it 70

Insane cake situation is insane

By Ethan - 12/05/2026 12:00 - United States - Fresno

Today, at a wedding reception, on a crowded dance floor, it was a perfect opportunity for a candid photo. I took one step back without looking and bumped straight into the cake table, then watched in slow motion as the entire cake tipped and slid off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 119

You deserved it 407

Love is love

By Anonymous - 12/05/2026 03:00 - United States - Indianapolis

Today, it's another day of being madly in love with a girl. We went on a date on Saturday and I’m so in love. I want to have her over to hang out but my parents would freak because I was raised in a devout Christian household. So much for my teenage love story… FML

I agree, your life sucks 288

You deserved it 128

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Trauma Accident Kids Embarrassing Work Money You're fired Teenagers Pranks Transportation Poopoo peepee NSFW Sex Intimacy Parenting Family Cheating Love Fight Miscellaneous Awkward Lonely Shopping AITA Make up Dreams Medication Liar Weird Weddings

The Top

Today, I had to fake enthusiasm when my girlfriend told me she's pregnant. She has a nasty streak and I was planning to break up with her, but if I left her now everyone would think I’m the bad guy. I actually think she’s capable of killing me if she gets angry enough. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 213

You deserved it 917

Today, I had a job interview. When I got there, the lady interviewing me shook my hand and said, 'Hello, I'm gay.' I found this strange and I didn't know what to say, so I stated, 'Aw, it's OK, I support you.' She looked pretty offended, and I realized why when I found out that her name was Gaye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 869

You deserved it 18 360

Today, my husband and I have been trying to buy a house and start a family together. Now I find out that he just spent $5000 on comic books. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 334

You deserved it 4 520

Today, right now, I can say one thing for certain: Despite not knowing exactly what it means to be conventionally attractive, I still know for a fact I'm the exact opposite of that. People have told me that I look homeless. I shudder to think of how I'd look if I were actually homeless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 379

You deserved it 136

Today, I got home at 2am. It was dark but I heard my fiancé in the kitchen, so I went and kissed her, and grabbed both ass cheeks. Normally this would turn her on, but she screamed and turned on the lights. It was my sister. I groped my sister's ass. Why was she in my house in the dark at 2am? FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 044

You deserved it 251

Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 290

You deserved it 7 666